|Community Service-Teaching and Chinese calligraphy -HELP ON Extra-cirrcular
2 - Good afternoon. I think the community service topic affords you more possibilities to display multiple facets of your...
UndergraduatefabxxEF_Team5 - Oct 31, 2008
|"only winning over myself, will I win over the world." - Admissions Essay
Undergraduateagus3264EF_Team5 - Oct 31, 2008
|taking challenging courses in school - evaluate my FSU Admission Essay?
2 - Good afternoon. A few mechanical suggestions. "Who's" should be "whose." Remove the comma after "high school." Also, avoid...
UndergraduatebryambautistaEF_Team5 - Oct 31, 2008
|From visiting my two brothers at UCF I determined that UCF is the perfect school for me.
2 - Good afternoon. One of my brothers worked on campus for UCF. After visiting them, I noticed many...
UndergraduateJoshrulesEF_Team5 - Oct 31, 2008
|Competitions, National Honors Society, NYU school - supplemental essays
Undergraduatenyczxgemiinyczxgemii - Oct 30, 2008
|[Argument]The residents of San Perdito should vote Montoya out of office
3 - I really appriate your help. Please point out in details what I can do to improve my essay. Are...
Writing Feedbackfranklampardenfranklamparden - Oct 30, 2008
|Important activity+motivation for making application-UT Honors Short Essays
NEW - I have two essays that I have completed and I want to make sure each are grammatically correct and...
|'My dad says not to give up' - Role Model Essay
6 - I made corrections, and explained more some ideas, i don't know if know it flows. As you form...
Undergraduatekatika2008katika2008 - Oct 30, 2008
|Global society, maximization of benefits - UT Honors program essay
3 - Thanks for your input! I always have had trouble ending essays. Your help is very appreciated....
Undergraduatebullybully - Oct 30, 2008
|Calculus & Diversity - Common App Essay
3 - Thank you so much for your quick response! I will go fix that. Also, somehow this sentence seems...
UndergraduateDamselflyDamselfly - Oct 30, 2008
|Penn autobiography; Adults and children are nearly two entirely separate species
2 - Good afternoon. Mechanically, when you start something with quotation marks, make sure you finish it. For instance, what...
Undergraduatex3racha3lEF_Team5 - Oct 30, 2008
|Drawing inspiration from Depression - Common App Essay
2 - Good afternoon. Mechanically, avoid using contractions in formal academic writing; they are inappropriate and many instructors will count...
UndergraduatemattvroegEF_Team5 - Oct 30, 2008
|to spend summer in New Zealand - Common App essay
2 - Good afternoon. Mechanically, a couple of things. First, avoid contractions in formal academic writing; they are inappropriate...
UndergraduatespinningjennyEF_Team5 - Oct 30, 2008
|In the hospitable bed, UF Essay: Meaningful Experience
2 - Good afternoon. The only thing I noticed about this piece was a contraction- "I'd." Make sure you avoid...
UndergraduateObie55EF_Team5 - Oct 30, 2008
|I will always seek the goodness around me - UF Essay
2 - Good afternoon. While this is a very well crafted introspective piece, I'm not sure it answers the prompt....
Undergraduatebitofvanilla91EF_Team5 - Oct 30, 2008
|My very first Youth and Government meeting - Common App Essay 250+
2 - Good afternoon. Just a few mechanical suggestions. First, when "referring" to something, make sure you are using...
Undergraduatecavemenrppl2EF_Team5 - Oct 30, 2008
|a class taught by a historic figure-living or dead - Writing sample
2 - Good afternoon. First, remember punctuation at the end of every sentence. Second, do you mean "stooped," or...
UndergraduatemickeygirlEF_Team5 - Oct 30, 2008
|Legend / Subtitles... description of images in texts.
2 - Good afternoon. Generally they are called "captions." "Together," "with," "in addition to," or "alongside" could also work....
Grammar, UsagesaragrunhagenEF_Team5 - Oct 30, 2008
|question about application requirement
2 - Good afternoon. The prompt asks you to put forth an original idea and support it, so it seems...
Graduatefx3zEF_Team5 - Oct 30, 2008
|"Why Carnegie Mellon University"
2 - Good afternoon. A few things. First, make sure you are only capitalizing proper nouns and the first...
UndergraduatecloudoneEF_Team5 - Oct 30, 2008
|To become a youth leader at my church - meaningful accomplishment in my life. UF Admission Essay
UndergraduateSturz15EF_Team5 - Oct 30, 2008
|fulfilling life because of Color - UF essay
2 - Good afternoon. A couple of suggestions. First "team mate" is one word: "teammate." Also, the conclusion is a...
UndergraduatelizcampEF_Team5 - Oct 30, 2008
|My passion towards History - UMich Essays.
2 - Good afternoon. First, mechanics for the first piece: "But somehow, I found myself caught up in teaching...
UndergraduateJaneyEF_Team5 - Oct 30, 2008
|Gardner's theory of multiple intelligences - Persuasive essay on why music should be in school
Writing FeedbackchazbellEF_Team5 - Oct 30, 2008
|My parents continually pushed me to be the very best - MIT Admissions Essay
NEW - Describe the world you come from, for example your family, clubs, school, community or town. How has the world...
|'International Human Rights Projects' - short answer for UPenn
NEW - Prompt: Penn offers its undergraduates an eminent faculty and a wealth of research opportunities. Use the space below to...
|I will accept any of the disadvantages - Personal statement
NEW - I'm applying to Seattle University and I need to write a min 250 words of essay. The question is...
|A passage about some measures to protect endangered animals
Writing FeedbacksweetbitterroseEF_Team5 - Oct 29, 2008
|Recommend change to our next president - Penn State #3 Essay
2 - Good evening. My first concern with this essay is that of missing citation. You have quite a few...
Undergraduatejusanglee91EF_Team5 - Oct 29, 2008
|developing life threatening disease - Penn State #2 Essay
Undergraduatejusanglee91EF_Team5 - Oct 29, 2008