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My Biographical Essay for QuestBridge: my vision will become my reality

3 - hahaha, not even a little? Don't use this structure. This is what they call "the passive...

Scholarshipsunkistgirl - Sep 19, 2010EF_Kevin - Sep 21, 2010
compare the american and somalia wedding edit this essay

NEW - I when to one of my friend wedding and I was see the different American and Somalia wedding. I...

Writing Feedbacksadia456 - Sep 21, 2010 -
UNC Essay - How I Express My Inner World

7 - Hello Addison!! I agree with Mark. Your writing is excellent and quite poetic! However, this is an...

Undergraduatesrockrae - Sep 17, 2010ershad193 - Sep 21, 2010
Prompt: What is the best advice you have ever recieved?

2 - At the end, you write: By following this advice, those ideas that were... And it makes me think, "What...

Undergraduatepintianz - Sep 19, 2010EF_Kevin - Sep 21, 2010
I am... (abstract/concrete/truthful ideas and statements) poem

4 - I agree that for this poem you need to consider what is abstract and what is concrete... however I...

PoetryAvioz - Sep 16, 2010xynare - Sep 21, 2010
Williams Essay (any environment that is particularly significant to you)

7 - Without your heritage, you would still be something. :-) The glimpse outside the window now shows that...

Undergraduateseannkim190 - Sep 1, 2010EF_Kevin - Sep 21, 2010
Georgia Tech -what will you do if you have to delay college for one year?

2 - Very good idea! This is an impressive thought. How old are you? I think this would also make...

Undergraduatehminluo - Sep 19, 2010EF_Kevin - Sep 21, 2010
Thesis for the Count of Monte Cristo by Alexander Dumas?

9 - I have to ask the question: did you read the book? If not, then there are other alternatives,...

Book Reportsemiloony - Mar 9, 2009mea505 - Sep 21, 2010
7 Year BS/MD Application Essay/Common App

7 - A nice thing to add to this would be a paragraph about the articles you have already read, some...

Undergraduaterasberritanjelo - Sep 7, 2010EF_Kevin - Sep 21, 2010
Everyone would benefit from taking more exercise do you agree?

13 - Hi Tina, I was waiting for Kevin to chime in with respect to your essay -- and he...

Writing Feedbackn_tina59 - Sep 19, 2010mea505 - Sep 21, 2010
The teachers should be adequately compensated for their hard labor, skills, commitment and sacrifice

3 - Either use a period or a colon. It is better to use a period, but a colon is not...

Writing Feedbackdil - Sep 19, 2010EF_Kevin - Sep 21, 2010
Pursuit of knowledge: analysis of doctor faustus and frankenstein

2 - It might be nicer to use a pronoun he or she rather than "it" at the beginning of the...

Undergraduateginny2345 - Sep 19, 2010EF_Kevin - Sep 21, 2010
Friend for Life: writing class

7 - Friend are important for our life I have 2 friend very close to me One is kitty another...

Writing Feedbacktanhung106 - Sep 12, 2010KellyBarbirgirl - Sep 21, 2010
A teacher is the one who guides the child how to live a successful life; Parents

2 - Hi, I think your essay has lot of good points. I like it. Please take a look at the...

Writing FeedbackGeorgesebastian - Sep 21, 2010dil - Sep 21, 2010
The ability to think: Common Application. Elaborate on one Activity.

13 - Hi! I am offering the following suggestions to your final draft: every victory, every match, and every...

UndergraduateShadow93 - Aug 7, 2010mea505 - Sep 21, 2010
Fellowship Essay for PhD program-how do you plan to help Egypt?

20 - Yes, indeed! Your essay looks great! Other than the change that I recommended, there is nothing at all wrong...

Scholarshipabbasadel - Aug 6, 2010mea505 - Sep 21, 2010
'techniques and tips in graphics'- Graphic Design Admissions 150 words

2 - sounds great- but I think at the beginning you should be more specific about who your referring to...

Undergraduateyumyum242 - Sep 21, 2010niklev - Sep 21, 2010
"The Dive" - Common Application Swimming Essay

9 - Hey all, once again, thank you for your comments, they've been amazing! So for this revised version, I cut...

UndergraduateYihao - Sep 8, 2010Yihao - Sep 21, 2010
"I am a loaf of bread" - Unique Personal Essay: Wanted

5 - Yep, great job here... great variation of sentence length, and it is just such a cool metaphor. The word...

Writing Feedbackmneale324 - Sep 14, 2010EF_Kevin - Sep 21, 2010
Memorable people that influenced you (my grandmother) - Cbest writing

3 - During our life time we all have encountered some memorable people that influenced .In fact,I grew up in a...

Writing Feedbackconcord123 - Sep 18, 2010EF_Kevin - Sep 20, 2010
MIT - Computers: Department that interests you the most (100 words)

6 - Computers have always intrigued me, and the developments in the last decade show that sky is the limit for...

Undergraduatebbdy123123 - Sep 16, 2010EF_Kevin - Sep 20, 2010
"Through My Lens" Common App Essay

3 - good sentence... I like the tone you set with your sentence structure. Quote marks would be good...

Undergraduatephilip717 - Sep 18, 2010EF_Kevin - Sep 20, 2010
Questions about writing an essay on 'someone who has made an impact on your life'

3 - Yes! It fits, but if you start talking about diversity it might or might not fit. The thing...

UndergraduateBlackCanary - Sep 18, 2010EF_Kevin - Sep 20, 2010
The co-workers should believe in fellowship. Some important characteristics of a co-worker - Toefl

5 - Therefore he always left office sharp on time without giving any consideration to whether the work had been finished...

Writing Feedbacksuve - Sep 18, 2010EF_Kevin - Sep 20, 2010
FSU Essay: Spirited Character Makes a True Seminole

4 - wow, very interesting! That must have been a cool experience. Hmmmm... it seems like this is an...

UndergraduateNRiusech - Sep 18, 2010EF_Kevin - Sep 20, 2010
Isn't it worth to try to find out what more things wait for us on the other side

4 - Thanks, Shannon Martin & Kevin. I made careless mistakes. Thank you for your advice. It has been great...

Writing Feedbackbrlee82 - Sep 18, 2010brlee82 - Sep 20, 2010
How/When did you become interested in writing? Pratt Institute Undergrad Admiss Essay

4 - Watch out for the typo here: ...by father would suggest. Try it this way: What a strange and...

Undergraduatezmint - Sep 18, 2010EF_Kevin - Sep 20, 2010
Common App Short Essay: Center Stage

4 - oh! beautiful. This is a beautiful sentence. I like. It is as though the world as I...

Undergraduatequakergirl93 - Sep 18, 2010EF_Kevin - Sep 20, 2010
"My pragmatic perspective" - Rice Admission Essay

5 - Thank you both so much! Very Solid input, I really appreciate it....

Undergraduatesambo595 - Sep 15, 2010sambo595 - Sep 20, 2010
"fascinated with building things- Vires, Artes, Mores are reflected in your life how?

5 - that makes senses Donrocks and thank you for your input EF Kevin....

Undergraduatekoreanbobcat - Sep 14, 2010koreanbobcat - Sep 20, 2010
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