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The background of my dissertation - ISO

Bahareh PhD 1 / 3  
Jan 18, 2017   #1

Directives and Policies - ISO

ISO introduces a list of RCBs (Registered Certification Bodies) for certification procedure as authorized certification organisations. These CBs help organisations to determine the extension to which there already is conformity with the ISO 27001 and further actions required for successful certification, as a preliminary examination. Afterwards, the necessary measures for the ISO 27001 conformity should be defined in a preparation project. External experts are required for a certification process, for the essential level of knowledge and experience in the field of InfoSec as well as ISO 27001 implementation requirements. Initially, the RCB check all the documents, such as security policy and process description. The main audit follows this preparation phase with carrying out a detailed examination during an on-site visit lasting several days. This phase consist of several steps. For instance, interviewing all responsible employees to examine their understanding of the security policy. Subsequently, employees describe processes, present details and procedures, explain process documentation as well as discuss known weaknesses and improvement measures initiated.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 13,728 4511  
Jan 18, 2017   #2
Bahareh, I am not clear as to what the background you are writing is about. Sure it is about ISO RCB's, but what is your point in deciding to write about this? There are a number of considerations that should be presented in your background paper. Information such as the background and connection between the history of the topic you have chosen, its importance in your current industry, and the relevance / importance of your research in terms of improving the industry. The background you have presented is still a draft and has a long way to go before it can become an actual background for your dissertation proposal. This only introduces the background of the ISO and RCB functions. It doesn't clearly represent your central topic for research.
OP Bahareh PhD 1 / 3  
Jan 18, 2017   #3
Dear Holt,
It is one paragraph of my background chapter about an ISO standard and certification bodies. I would like my grammar and word choices to be checked.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 13,728 4511  
Jan 19, 2017   #4
Bahareh, are you supposed to present only a single paragraph for the background information? The reason I ask is because the background information should be divided into 3 paragraphs, based upon the 3 types of information that you present in the discussion. You should be able to perfectly develop the explanations that way. Right now, the explanation is rushed, seems to be incomplete, and requires more development. The grammar itself is alright and is acceptable in most academic circles. There are some profession specific terms used which add to the authoritative voice of what you are telling the reader. Considering the overall presentation of the essay though, I would have to say that this is potentially a usable format in terms of grammar and content, provided everything needs to be presented in only one paragraph.
OP Bahareh PhD 1 / 3  
Jan 19, 2017   #5
Dear Holt,
I need to submit my dissertation in March, and as I thought I cannot put the whole chapter for correction in this forum, I thought it would be a better idea to only put some paragraphs here that I am not sure about wording, grammar..

Of course, I have to submit a dissertation of 150 pages, with several chapters, and each chapter not less than 10 pages..
I can maybe send you each section consist of several paragraphs, but then it will be a part of my dissertation at the end.
I need more specific comment maybe I can rewrite some sentences to improve clarity, or choose better words to express my mind..
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 13,728 4511  
Jan 19, 2017   #6
Okay. I have analyzed your work once again and I believe there are 2 points where you can present an improvement in your work. Since this is a background paper, I believe that it is important for you to explain your understanding as to why the RCB is required for ISO certification. Does it have any subsidiary bodies? Indicate what industries usually require their certification and approval. Additional summarized information about the need to double check their security policies and process description. Grammar-wise, the essay is not bad. Your paragraph is understandable and does not contain any words that might be misconstrued by the reader. It is ready for use as is. Or, you can improve some of it using the parts that I noticed could use a little more work above. The title of the paragraph is clearly explained once you read the paragraph. No worries there. This is a pretty solid essay in its original form, even without the suggestions I made since you will be submitting this to a professor who is highly familiar with the topic you are presenting as your dissertation topic.
OP Bahareh PhD 1 / 3  
Jan 19, 2017   #7
Thanks a lot. I really appreciate your time and help.

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