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Ryerson undergraduate admission essay writing. (reasons, details)


sakibniaz 2 / 9  
Jan 16, 2009   #1
Hello Everyone!!
I am applying in Ryerson to enroll in Business Management. I have to prepare one or two page document for choosing Business Management program based on the following:

"outline the reasons you decided to apply for this program, as well as details and factors relevant to the review of your application"

I really don't know how to start, somebody please help me!!!!!!!!!

Thanx
zowzow 10 / 175  
Jan 16, 2009   #2
find some sort of a major influence or a incident that led you to choose the major of your choice. Was it someone that you knew? something that happened during school? think carefully about your life and how you decided to major in business management.

for the details and factors relevant... i guess it means talk about any sort of experience you have had in this area? like internships etc

good luck
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
Jan 16, 2009   #3
Good advice! Start by grabbing the reader's attention. Say something unexpected. Then, use two sentences to explain an importat insight that has compelled you to enter this particular progra at this school. Why does it absolutely have to be this school? Why is this school perfect for you? Show that you have a detailed plan for your success.

:)
OP sakibniaz 2 / 9  
Jan 17, 2009   #4
For the first part, do I have to write about my interest in business management program or the Business Management program in Ryerson? PLs clarify this, I am very confused about this issue.

Can u tell me what they actually meant by 'details and factors relevant to the review of your application'?
EF_Sean 6 / 3,491  
Jan 17, 2009   #5
You might find it helpful to research Ryerson's Business Management program a bit. Find out from their website what aspects of the program the university is particularly proud of. That way, you just have to come up with reasons for wanting to attend that connect to those aspects of the program, and you'll be well on your way to having a first draft.
alisa 3 / 21  
Jan 17, 2009   #6
great school to go to. If you get in the residence sucks.
OP sakibniaz 2 / 9  
Jan 20, 2009   #7
Finally, I composed an essay related to the above topic mentioned. Please proofread, check for grammatical errors, punctuation errors, etc and please leave your comment.
OP sakibniaz 2 / 9  
Jan 21, 2009   #8
I am applying in Ryerson to enroll in Business Management. I have to prepare one or two page document for choosing Business Management program based on the following:

"outline the reasons you decided to apply for this program, as well as details and factors relevant to the review of your application"
menamilad /  
Jan 21, 2009   #9
you need to focus more on the impact of business on you... instead of the fame& money you'll harvest.. p.s. the conclusion should be like what are your plans after graduation and how will you spend your time at college...etc..

you need to show them how INCREDIBLE you are..
good luck :)
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
Jan 21, 2009   #10
I was spellbound by the business world ever since I was a teenager. On my way to school every morning, I noticed numerous staff members working in RMG industries rushing to their place. Subsequently My grandpa explained that those industries are owned by businessmen and that many people will not find a job if businessmen would not take initiative in setting up such enormous organizations. Hearing this, I was ...

In addition to studies, I am engaged in a couple of activities to broaden my horizon and gaining a competitive edge in my business career. Firstly I registered in Acid Survivors Foundation to participate in voluntary activities.
menamilad /  
Jan 21, 2009   #11
i did the same thing in my personal statement for pharmacy..yes you should mention your grandfather again in the conclusion
for example : i will make him proud of my... bla bla bl

good luck :)
OP sakibniaz 2 / 9  
Jan 21, 2009   #12
Finally, I composed a final draft. Please proofread and give your final comments.

I was captivated by the business world ever since I was a teenager. On my way to school every morning, I carefully watched numerous garment industries' staff members rushing to their workplace. Observing my attention, grandpa explained that those industries are owned by businessmen and that many people will not find a job if businessmen would not take initiative in setting up such enormous organizations. Hearing this, I was immensely motivated to get involved in business not only to earn profit but also to serve the society by providing employment in order to alleviate hunger and poverty from the economy. One day, my dad, witnessing my growing curiosity, took me inside a garment industry. I was totally astonished looking at the teamwork and collaboration of the workers combined with state-of-art equipments allowing them to produce goods in a very short time. This enhanced my interest in business even further and directed me to study business-related subjects like economics and accounting. From then onwards, I was fascinated watching business news channels and reading business columns in the newspapers and magazines.

In addition to studies, I have been engaged in a couple of activities to broaden my horizon and gain a competitive edge in my business career. I registered in Acid Survivors Foundation in their various projects. The important things that I learned there are completing tasks before the deadline and business ethics. People looked at me and complimented my resolutions and obedience. Furthermore, I started learning French because I have seen that people have to interact with others from different nationalities as the business progresses. Therefore, speaking various languages, apart from English, in truly beneficial. As I am planning to set up a business company in Canada, understanding the French language will equip me well to diversify and target a greater segment of the customers whose mother tongue is French.

Finally, I choose Ryerson to pursue my undergraduate program because I am concerned about my studies as well as my professional future. Ryerson has distinctive undergraduate program that blends theory with real-world experience, and in such a program I will be able to transform into a business marvel. Other than this, a degree from Ryerson will facilitate my acquisition of a professional position after I graduate, because, statistically speaking, more than 94% of Ryerson's students are employed six months after graduation. Even though my grandpa is no more alive, I still remember his wise sayings of which the popular one is 'Do not limit yourself. Many people limit themselves to what they think they can do. You can go as far as your mind lets you. What you believe, remember, you can achieve.' Bearing this in mind, I live with the hope of untangling critical business issues in the future.
onindo 5 / 20  
Jan 21, 2009   #13
Woh dude you worked in ASF?? so did I !! Hey you're a Scholastican. So am I!!!

This was a good essay. I don't think any change is needed.

And since you're applying for Business, Why don't you apply to York? I'll be applying there..it'll be good to have a couple of my schoolmates there with me.
EF_Sean 6 / 3,491  
Jan 21, 2009   #14
Some minor grammatical fixes:

"many people would not find a job if businessmen did not take initiative in setting up such enormous organizations."

"Even though my grandpa is no longer alive"

"I still remember his wise sayings, of which his favorite was "


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