Hello everyone,I am a fresher here.Now I want to apply for a graduate program.This is the draft of my PS .I hope to be revised by you intelligent people.Thanks sincerely.
Tracing back when I was a little girl, growing up in a doctor's family spontaneously gave me a desire to be a doctor like my father, who has a highly reputation in patients. But life will not always goes under my control and it forces us to form adaptations in a totally unfamiliar ecosystem like animals behave in the mysterious natural world. Three years academic training in logistics field stimulates a strong desire sprout in my heart that I will go on this road in my further study. I chose supply chain and logistics to be my future research area in this field because I felt the importance when I went to some industries during my trainings and internships. The consideration in supply chain and logistics, apart from cargo services or courier services, is at minimum level and yet to be promoted because it is one of the few sources of eliminating spare activities that could lead any industry to its path of success.
I am always told by my teachers that the drastic competition among modern enterprises is not concentrated on the company's core resource itself but has diverted into the competition of supply chain management. There is a proverbial saying in the business field that there is no permanent friends, only permanent interest. Cooperation and competition are evolved into a dynamic cycle among the modern enterprises based on the supply chain management. Recently years, China has been taken under the flashlight by other countries because of the surprising achievement in economy. But the growth of this country's economy has not unleashed its zoom effect on the evolution of the single company as well as most of them are at a standstill with a traditional competition theory. I will devote myself to this field to change the awkward situation and fulfill the commitment for myself.
Is this essay a personal history statement or a statement of purpose?
For your grammar, I cannot help since I am Chinese too:( but I do spot some conspicuous mistakes, for instance the first sentence....
For the content, however, I have a suggestion that you focus more on what you have done as opposed to what you think and comment. For one thing, such things don't catch eyes; for another, they may seem cliche in the eyes of those specialists in your field.
Hope that help:)
You mentioned the importance you felt about the supply chain and logistics during your training and internship, will you consider to describe some specific situation you have experienced? I hope it helps. Good luck on your application!
Thanks for you all.I have submitted my application.I am more than happy to have your favor during this process!