This is my personal SOP for ph.d program.
I want you to look through and correct my grammar errors and organization.
Thanks a lot.
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I relatively was living and abundant lives and affluent lives thanks to our parents who had very respectful and well-paid jobs: my father was a chief in the branch of the Korea Housing Bank. He was in lending the mortgage products and managing the risks on the securities. My father frequently told me how the real estate market was on the move. I have vaguely wanted to learn the real estate market and become a real estate person. We had to square the debts by disposing the whole of our fortune and subsequently had to move to a small and shabby place.
In 1997, the Korea Housing Bank had fiscal exigencies and went bankrupt in the International Monetary Fund (IMF) regime, and thereby my family also faced a crucial crisis. My family had to live far apart for three years. The separation between the families is really heart-breaking. In addition, when the Korea Housing Bank went bankrupt, the financial system of other firms invested in by my father also was paralyzed. The bank's financial crisis eventually forced my father to stand-by working as a chief and he had no choice but to try to persuade many investors of the bank in order to stabilize our family's finance.
He, however, never gave up his job and knew what he had to do. He not only contracted with other companies about funding but also continued to amplified depositors of the bank. I delivered pizza and worked gas station. I kept saving money in my family's savings account to help my parents. After a few years of united family efforts, the family members, who had been living separately, decided to live together again and we were able to move into a new and better place. I would forever remember the emotional sensations and happiness we felt and shared at this moment. After all, my father became a chief again in the Kukmin Bank, which is merged with Korea Housing Bank. At this time, I was convinced that I would like to achieve my goal: to learn the real estate finance and become a financial expert.
I majored in real estate at Konkuk University in Seoul, which has the best real estate program in Korea during my undergraduate studies and I now pursue a doctoral degree at University of Michigan, Ann Arbor. Given the chance, I hope to show to my future classmates of your school the perseverance and passion that I have learned from my family and a different real estate financial market in Korea.
Irelatively was living and abundant lives and affluent lives thanks to ourparents who had very respectful and well-paid jobs:
---> If you start with 'I,' keep using the first person, don't change to third suddenly: "thanks to
my parents."
---> "I was living a relatively abundant and affluent life..."
---> "parents," "well-paid jobs."
My father was a chief (what do you mean by chief?) in the branch of the Korea Housing Bank. He was in lending the mortgage products and managing the risks on the securities. (This sentence is very confusing... I'm not sure I know what you mean.) My father frequently told me that the real estate market was on the move. Consequently, I have been vaguely interested in learning about the real estate market in order to become a real estate person. Unfortunately, my family fell into debt.We hadTo square the debts we had to use our (small?) fortune and subsequently had to move into a small and shabby place subsequently .
