Hey guys I want to apply for a master program at Masdar Institute, please help me with any comment
Thank you so much.
Statement of Objectives
The conservation of nature is an obligation of humanity, but how to achieve the conservation of it? From my point of view we should start to change the way that we generate energy but not just stay with laboratory experiments, it is important to implement the result of these on a global scale for that purpose people prepared to assume this challenge is needed. In this essay I manifest different reasons and ideas that express why I want to accept this challenge, which are: how I see the world today, what are my professional objectives, in what areas to address my graduate studies to meet them, how to help the world form my workplace. In addition, how my undergraduate studies and work experience prepared me in order to success in the master program and finally why Masdar Institute of Technology is the best choice to continue my graduate studies.
First, since the industrial revolution ways to obtaining energy were sought, these were focused on the burning of fossil fuels, over the years the impact of these sources had on the environment was evident whereby the world has thought of using renewable energy sources which are effective, efficient and can meet the energy demands of today's world.
Moreover, as part of a generation that channels all its resources in favor of the conservation and sustainability of the planet, I have considered as professional goals, to contribute with my knowledge and experience in the development of new ways to generate and control energy in the world. To promote the use of tools those allow the creation of energy sources with minimal environmental impact thus neglecting the consumption of fossil fuels sources. To instruct new generations in the necessity to nature conservation and provide sufficient mechanisms to encourage them in research and implementation of these friendly environment technologies.
For the purpose of fulfill my career goals I want to address my studies in two important fields of power engineering. First deepen the investigation of power converters thereby I can face compatibility problems between sources and loads effectively in the power control. Second learn smart grid systems in order to modernize and manage the processes of generation, transportation, distribution and commercialization of energy acquiring tools which allow me to design energy models in order to cover the needs of society.
Once I completed my postgraduate studies I plan to return to my home country and start a company whose main objective will be promote the use of sustainable sources and technologies, for this the first step will be help to build clean energy sources such as: hydroelectric plants, solar farms, wind turbines, etc. when Ecuador have energy independence from fossil fuels, create and develop an infrastructure of private and public transportation to support the reduction of CO2 emissions, thus conserving the world's most biodiverse located in Ecuador, also encourage the application of management in electrical networks to thereby optimize energy resources.
Furthermore, one of the most challenging moments of my student life was when I was doing my undergraduate thesis, because I investigated complex identification theories of systems and I also implemented power converters with sophisticated control techniques, which ones did arose in me a thirst for knowledge about them due to the fact power converters were an essential part of my graduation project. Moreover, during the time I have exercised my engineering profession I realized the problems facing my country for example: the little technological development, insufficient energy generation systems, in addition to the extraction and marketing of oil as the basis for national economy, for these reasons I want to remedy these deficiencies, improve the standard of living in Ecuador as well as conservation of the nature with the help that I can obtain studying the graduate program in Electrical Power Engineering.
Additionally, when I have started looking for a university where to continue my graduate studies I found in Masdar Institute of Technology a program that suited my professional an academic goals, also one of the things that caught my attention was the unique approach to renewable and sustainable energy which has the institute. Additionally I want to study at the United Arab Emirates to know their culture and acquire the knowledge of how a society that based its economy on oil change its way of thinking and now is one of the leading nations in contributing to the conservation of the environment.
In conclusion, the world is in the constant search for new ways to obtain energy in order to satisfy its needs. However, these alternatives must be renewable and sustainable for the pursuit of development a planet where future generations can live without pollution. As far as I am concerned, how I can help the fulfillment of this aim as a professional is to research and develop the cutting edge technologies such as power converters and smart grid, which help in the creation of efficient infrastructure in public and private transportation as well as the generation and distribution of energy. Moreover, my excellent academic performance along my undergraduate career with an appropriate work experience make me feel prepared to use all the tools and knowledge that can give me the Masdar Institute towards accomplish my professional goals and thus be an active part of this generation that wants a sustainable world.
First, since the industrial revolution ways to obtaining energy
First, since the industrial revolution ways to obtaining energy were sought, these were ...==>better if you make it becomes some sentences, because it is too long to be one sentence
Hi Irvin, I must say, at a glance, this particular letter is way to long for a letter to the institution with a sole purpose of getting in for a masters degree. Most of the essays I have read, on the same agenda, is written in a way that is direct, precise, straight to the point and with all the necessary, vital and detailed information on the topic that works best for the applicant.
Now, don't get me wrong, I read your letter and it is clearly elaborative, full details are evident to the essay, however, most of the information you provided is not necessary to this application.
Remember, as you are applying for the masters program, the admission staff already knows your eagerness to the subject at hand, they already know that you have the passion and dedication to the craft, stating the obvious, sometimes helps but most of the time, excessive information can lead to devastating results, so you have to be very careful.
What I suggest is you revise the essay, introduction should be a brief background, the body, this can be 2 paragraphs, details of your academic ambition, lastly, the conclusion, draw your future self, what will you gain out of this masters program.
There you have it Irvin, I hope to review the revision soon
