Our country needs more efficient economic policies - Masters in Economics

Hello.
I'd like to apply for the master's course in a certain university,
but my English is a little bit poor, so I am not sure that my cover letter is sufficient.
Could you check my cover letter what is wrong or bad?
Please, help me.

Cover letter;Master's Program in Economic Policy

Hello.
yesterday, I gave some advice from people.
so I corrected my cover letter.
Please check my words.

Dear Sir or Madam

I would like to apply for the Master's Program in Economic Policy at the University of QQQ. I have been an activist in local NGO and left-wing political party in South Korea for almost ten years. And I hold two bachelor's degrees in law and economics.

While I have worked in both NGO and left-wing political party, I realized that many economic policies are irrational, and fail to benefit the poor people of my country. This realization promoted me to study economics at the Korea Open University in hope of making my contribution one day to formulate more practical and efficient economic policies for my country. Consequently, I achieved good results in Macroeconomics and International economics during my study.

The reason I have chosen your course is that I would like to learn economics from a different perspective and environment in the centre of Europe, with South Korea relatively. Especially, I am interested in both the International and Development Economics and Economic Policies in your specialized electives. And the career prospect that you will provide is likely to be a great opportunity for me to work in the international dimension after holding a Master's degree.

My future plan is to be able to work in the international organizations. After I can have many different experiences in there, I can come back to home country to work in public sector to increase the quality of people's life.

As a result, I hope my application will be accepted and I am looking forward to study in the QQQ.

Sincerely yours.

what do you mean of after during??
I think your essay is comprehensive but it's better to be more formal and academic. you also don't need to state all those details about your future plan, instead focus more on your skills and interests.

If you know about any project of that supervisor which is related to your work or your field of interest that you intend to attend, talking about that will raise your chance

...capitalize the party to have prominance to it.


During my invovement with the NGO and politics, I realized that many economic policies, though not irrational, fail to benefit the poor people of our country.


This realization promoted me to study economics at the Korea Open University in hope of making my contribution one day to formulate more practical and efficient economic policies for our country.

thank you, dido and dumi