Sorry took so long to get back to you. I hd a test I had to study for :)
My experience spans over 10 years as a legal professional from being an academician at National Law University, Jodhpur - one of the best law school, to being an in-house counsel in Reserve Bank of India - country's Central Bank and Monetary Authorty. In this professional journey I have had the opportunity of learning about the theoretical aspects of law as well as how legal prescription can shape public policy especially in banking and financial sector.
I love what your are sayng in the paragrah, very impressive, but it sounds/reads like your trying to impress the reader. It's not a very strong opening, but it's not bad. It is my experience that trying to sound impressive with jargon & squeezing in a lot of information that may not be needed, does not always impress. you may need some re-wording/working here. it's ok to be simple:
ex: I have over ten years of experience as a legal professional starting from by years as a student at The National Law University, Jodhpur, to being an in-
house counsel in Reserve Bank of India.In my professional journey...
In modern times law and management has become
.... not sure if it just uploaded this way, but this should be the start of your new paragraph. On this display it looks like it's a part of your first paragraph, but reading it, it feels like it should be the start of a new thought/direction in the piece.
ok everything else looks great I love the order, I love what your saying. I like the flow and how you broke it into sections (i) (ii) (iii) etc..
until...
Hence, PGPX is the best programme
...
this should be the start of a new paragrah. It also feels like your mocking me the reader, by starting off with Hence, almost like your saying "Duh can't you see why I like this program,did I have to spell it out to you with my bullet points?" It is also very slightly similar to your bullet point (iii) I had to read this a few times because I thought you had typed the same thing twice. I understand that you are just trying to reinterate your point. Perhaps you can combine the two{(iii)-the end} and make your current bullet point (iii) part of your conclusion.
Also, you focus a lot on what the program can do for you, maybe use a new bullet point (iii) to say something about what you can bring to the program. My mother, when I was young, made us go to these high schools where you had to audition and go through an interview process to get in. I will never forget on my little brothers interview he was asked why they should let him in. He talked about what he could learn and get out of the school, but then he said I think that your school could also learn a lot of new things from me as well (or something along those lines). He got in and the admissions are still talking about how this little 8th grade kid impressed them by saying that one sentence, because all they ever here I get this and I get that, but never I have something to offer you in return. You have over 10yrs experience let them know what you have to bring to the table.
Hope this helps. These are only suggestions. You don't have to follow them, if you don't agree. Overall I thought it was very good!
-Raya