Loyola Statement of Purpose for Graduate School in Biostatistics

I am not the strongest writer and could use some help from proofreaders. Let me have it. Be critical. I'm not sure if my story is weak, awkward, or boring. Is the mention of the program in the last paragraph clunky? How can I smooth that out. What is this submission missing, if anything? This is a first draft and my punctuation is probably horrible. Thanks to whomever takes a look.

from games to a biostatistics field

I have always been a gamer. Card games, board games, and especially video games are all under that umbrella. Back in college I would play League of Legends the most. It is a strategy game with over one hundred unique characters. As I climbed my way through the ranked ladder I spent many off hours researching the best strategies, the best item purchases, and the best characters. My favorite website for all of this took the game data from thousands of matches and complied into nice and neat packages of information. The impact that this first impression of statistics had on me was more profound than I realized.

My friends favorite game, Smash Bros., had no such website. I took it upon myself to try and create my own information. I painstakingly went through every major tournament bracket for the past year and tallied all the results for every character in the game. It felt extraordinary to be able to produce my own numbers and share it with the Reddit community. It was a simple chart of win rates and play rates for each character. If only I had the knowledge and tools I could have done so much more! Even now I'm looking to do a similar project for a favorite board game. Only this time I won't have any preexisting information I can pull the data from.

From that initial game I developed a deep appreciation of large data. I know that it can be applied almost anywhere to describe so many phenomena. I wish to be able to extend my game knowledge with newly learned principles.

However, life is not all fun and games. This year my family was struck by the tragedies of cancer. It is devastating to lose someone you love. I am no doctor, chemist, or biologist but I am good with numbers. My goal is to create and hone my skills to be a powerful asset in the biostatistics field. I believe this is my chance to do my part for the world and enable the scientists out there with the best possible results from their hard work. If I can aid in the development of a new drug or treatment that saves other families from the disasters of cancer then I will be satisfied.

What I lack in formal academics of statistics I more than make up for in drive and passion. I know that my strong background in mathematics will be a great foundation for Loyola to further build upon the theory and principles of statistics. While my prior experience with coding will enable clean execution for modeling. I have read and written data but what is between the lines is what I'm after.

Statistic programs are common. It is only through Loyola that I know I will have a quality education to achieve my dream. Between STAT 436 and STAT 437 offering exactly the information I will need to succeed in a biostatistics field, their is also a capstone class take the theory and put it to practice. That kind of practical experience will be the most impactful piece of the program. It is because of these tools and excellent teaching staff that Loyola is my first choice for the future.

Brad, what you wrote is a personal statement, not a statement of purpose. For the statement of purpose, since you do not have the academic background with which to convince the reviewer of your ability to complete this course, you must rely on a tremendously strong professional background in the field for this presentation. Change the entire essay.

In order to bring attention to the fact that your background in statistics was developed through actual application, discuss how you ended up in this line of work instead. Show your employment history that will strengthen your professional training in the field. Then segue into the biostatics career choice. Why this career? What makes you think that you can succeed in this field even without an academic background in it? The answer? Present your purpose for higher study. That is not really present in your current essay since, like I said, this is a personal essay rather than a purpose essay.

Think about what your career goal is. That will be the reason that you want to pursue this course. Then talk about the potential you have as a student attending this university. Aside from the classes, what other offerings does the university have that can help you become a notable professional in the field? Think beyond the capstone studies. How can the university help you achieve that goal? That is the purpose for having chosen this university in particular.