This is my PS for law school (I hope!). I had written it with a specific school in mind, but have edited both their name and my city out. Any advice/critique would be helpful, and I would be more than happy to return the favor. It follows the "why this school? why this program" question. Thanks! :)
I was born into a perpetuating cycle of abuse. My mother beat her children the same way all the mothers in her family had been beating their children for centuries. To cope, like the many mothers before her, she turned to drugs and alcohol. While her mother had committed suicide when my mother was nine, my mother was an emotional wasteland by the time she met and married my father. My father, only half way through an 18-year career with the military, was constantly stationed in the Philippines and rarely spent time within our nation's borders, let alone our house. It would be easy to say that my family is a crystal cut mold from the absentee father and drug-addicted mother stereotype; however I am living proof that there is more to a person than simply what meets the eye.
With no real parental figure, I became an instant guardian and role model the day my brother was born. I began to want to be the role model our parents could not- and would not- be, and struggled to prove to my brother on a daily basis that he could be anything he wanted regardless of what went on in our stilted home. While I can admit now that my childhood philosophies may have been naïve, my past has greatly shaped the person I have become. Of all the things I have learned, the two most important are that children (much like college students) can survive on nothing but peanut butter and perseverance, and people are stopped only by their self-limitations. It is only when one feels they cannot succeed that they truly begin to fail.
I may not be a perfect 4.0 student, but I consider myself to be successful. I have just completed the most challenging and rewarding two years of my life. In the last 730 days I have gotten married, given birth to my beautiful daughter, and been diagnosed with cancer-all the while becoming the first person in my family to graduate from college. I recognize that life is not easy- even the greatest of successes are achieved only after immeasurable amounts of work. I cannot express the tenacity with which I have lunged after parenting and oncology, but I assure you that this is a drive seconded only by my academic endeavors.
While I was still working towards my Associate of Science in Criminal Justice, I completed an externship at the [______] Center for the Homeless. I've now been working there three years and while I greatly enjoy what I do, it has opened my eyes to a great inequality in the social justice system. What began merely as an afterschool filler has become a lifelong passion. My career at the Center has instilled within me the idea that there are greater issues in the world than just homelessness and matrilineal abuse. While taking a Spanish II course, I ran into a language barrier trying to explain where I work and what I do. The word "homeless" does not translate into the Spanish language, as was discovered by my professor who was born and raised in Uruguay.
The discontent of this translation barrier caused me to wonder what other social issues don't translate into other cultures. I do mean to imply that homelessness does not exist in other countries only that in many third world countries, the government lacks the adequate resources to cover what we deem as essential: homelessness and prevention, basic healthcare, food and housing assistance, as well as human rights. Many of the things the United States has deemed as "necessary" quite simply don't translate on a language level, a cultural level, or a governmental level.
I am pursing a Master's Degree in International Law because with it I plan to practice as an attorney in the embassy system. I hope to help implement, promote, and protect human rights laws in third world countries. I feel that all people- both inside and outside our nation's borders- have a right to social equality regardless of socio-economic standards. [______]'s program in International Law will challenge my beliefs and set me apart from my peers. It will give me the diverse platform I need in order to be successful in my field. If I can manage a life full of challenges, both temporary and permanent, there is nothing in my 1L courses at [______] that I cannot face. I look forward to the challenge, the diversity, and the preparation for my field that an education from [______] would bring.
a perpetuating cycle of abuse
If it is perpetuating, it is perpetuating something. But actually, you mean that it is being perpetuated.
I was born into a perpetuated cycle of abuse.
or
I was born into a self-perpetuating cycle of abuse.
My mother beat
... the two most important are that children (much like college students) can survive on nothing but peanut butter and perseverance, and that people are stopped only by their self-limitations. --- I like this part a lot.
I do
not mean to imply that homelessness does not exist in other co
untries -- only that in many third world countries the government lacks the adequate...
nice ending. good luck1 I'm sure this will be well-received. It might be a good idea to balance that negative material at the beginning with some positive material. For example, in order to seem like you are not completely disillusioned with adults after your rough childhood, you can tell a little about a teacher whose influence sent you in the direction of studying law. I think this will help to balance the negative parts at the beginning of this very well-written essay.
