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Masters admission - Letter of motivation - Management


lclinse 1 / -  
Jun 10, 2020   #1
Hi, I am applying for the Master of Management program. Please feel free to leave your feedback. A big thanks!

Master of Management program application



The world is changing at an unprecedented speed, and businesses once led the market may find themselves obsolete within only a few years. I still remembered how excited I was when browsing the DVDs at Blockbuster when I was little, but now people can enjoy movies just by opening Netflix. In addition to the rise of the OTT industry, what interests me is how these companies attract their customers. I hope to explore in-depth how technologies such as big data or algorithms are applied with business strategies to reach their customers effectively. I am also passionate about how people's behavior will be affected by these strategies. Therefore, thriving in a competitive company with preeminent business acumen would best enable me to achieve this goal. This idea also prompted me to pursue the MSc in Management at the University.

Firstly, applying for your prestigious program would be an exceptional opportunity for me to improve my decision-making skills as well as business management knowledge via courses and case studies. My extracurricular involvement with AIESEC allowed me to learn about a prominent organization's vision and strategies and develop leadership. For example, I experienced frustrations when I was first elected as the team leader. I found it challenging to align team goals with members' expectations since they have different voices. During the midterm exams, when there was a trade-off between coursework and project effort, their commitment to the projects also varied. Fortunately, after communicating with each individual and understanding their concerns, I came up with a solution. I set a group calendar to clarify the roles of each member. Then, we agreed on approaches to problem-solving by cooperation. It was not perfect, but with these actions, our team became more engaged, and we were proud to accomplish the projects together. Through this experience, I realized the power of leadership while tackling constant challenges.

Moreover, I learned that the school community presents students with strong career support. My previous experience at Robert Walters has offered me the possibility to learn market insights directly from the insiders. I expect to share my awareness of the job market in Taiwan with my classmates, which may benefit those aiming for entrepreneurship or those seeking a career in the technology field. For instance, unlike Kodak, the camera manufacturer Polaroid survived in the market through the surging demand for live broadcasting. They even plan to expand their workforce to launch a new product line.

Finally, the campus' positive environment for innovation can increase my chances of entering a prominent business with a hyper-growth model. This varied array of values may broaden my horizons to undertake multiple tasks with different parties in the future. To augment the scope of my mindset in business management and to engage in the vibe of a prosperous global society, I believe that the best choice is to have an education overseas. Simultaneously, I look forward to learning and sharing my skill set during my MSc in Management study at the University.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,835 4783  
Jun 10, 2020   #2
There is no clear motivation in your essay. That is because you aimed to present a personal statement as opposed to a motivational letter. The motivational letter should contain some specific information and topics. These should be the driving factors behind your interest in pursuing this course. It should not just be about the organization. You need to prove that there is a reason for your desire to improve your skills through advanced study. If this is for the Erasmus Mundus scholarship, all the more your essay needs to be precise in terms of content.

You have to provide the motivation immediately, within the first paragraph. Then from there, build on the idea as to how the scholarship can help you achieve this motivation. After providing that information, you should explain why it is important for you to become well educated in this area. Then, explain how you will apply these lessons in the future. In the event that you are writing for EM, you should also indicate how, because of the opportunities given to you by the scholarship, you will be motivated to further promote the scholarship in your country and how you would be an active participant in the network, based on the motivations that will be developed or further enhanced during your studies. If possible offer examples of the motivations you may develop during that time.


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