Please evaluate my essay...
from Bangladesh to Hungary
Letter of intent
Dear Sir/Madam
With this letter, I might want to express my enthusiasm for learning at Budapest University of Technology and Economics as a master's student. Electrical Engineering-in the era one of the most promising and intriguing areas of research is exactly what I am interested and passionate about. My career objective is to be an active researcher and skilled professional in the plan of Electrical Machines, Electric Conversion Systems, Control and Automation, Electric Power frameworks just as Embedded Systems. A master's degree in Budapest University of Technology and Economics will be an authentic step towards accomplishing my target.
I steadily acknowledge that inquisitive and exploitative temper prompts reliable learning process. As an Electrical Engineer, I scan for graduate assessment to refine my understanding and aptitudes in my zones of interest. I believe Higher preparing aptitudes will help me with finding a beneficial calling similarly as fortify my imaginative personality.
All through my scholarly life I have consistently been at or close to the highest point of my group. I completed my essential, optional and higher auxiliary board assessments with a decent evaluation. I have finished my Bachelor of Science in Electrical and Electronic Engineering from Leading University which is one of the eminent Universities in Bangladesh. During my undergrad study subjects like Energy Conversion, Power System, Power Plant Engineering, Digital Electronics, PC systems, Signals and direct frameworks, VLSI, Control frameworks have been my favorite subjects. The electronic chip has constantly interested me. My undergrad thesis was "Plan and Implementation of Wireless Patient Monitoring System" which I achieved effectively as the gathering chief. The key goal of building up my thesis was to caution therapeutic warning about present wellbeing state of patient by means of remote. Here I utilized remote module with the goal that I could screen the wellbeing state of a patient from separation end to the specialist.
After finished my graduation I associated with a Local Consultant of Bangladesh Rural Electrification Board which is a significant power conveyance organization in Bangladesh. I have been laboring for a long time and performed Sub-station Layout Design, Voltage drop study, System misfortune study, Power factor study, Sectionalizing study, Proposal of new sub-station, Augmentation of sub-station, Updating of operational single line graph, ESMF (Environmental and Social Management Framework) reports for lines and sub-stations, GIS( Geographical data system) for lines and sub-stations. I have obtained profundity information about influence transmission and circulation framework just as major electrical parts.
My interest is now to work on embedded information systems, communication systems, control systems, electrical engineering systems, process automation and informatics, telecommunication and industrial communication, which is mentioned in the university's Master's Program in Electrical Engineering course. I accept the program won't just sharpen my aptitudes and empower me to create master information that will assist me with overcoming difficulties yet will likewise give more extensive acknowledgment of the power segment. In addition, by joining a global network at Budapest University of Technology and Economics, I will pick up intercultural fitness and better comprehension of the world overall.
Bangladesh has a probability to progress towards increasing the demand of Electrical Energy as it's a developing country. Bangladesh is quite unable to compete with the present world technological advancement status. We need to confront the forthcoming difficulties. We are relaxing and contending with the worldwide individual in each regard. It is unwise to waste a single moment to prepare to meet the upcoming global challenges. There has significantly needed competent manpower in my country. I want to envisage myself as a skillful person and my aim is to do something for my country with my work and brain.
I am mindful Universities in Hungary offer incredible breadth and support for Intellectual and scholarly improvement. The procedure of specialized progression is quick in Hungary. So as to keep myself refreshed with most recent specialized advances I am quick to get MS degree in Hungary.
Finally, I feel that life is constant learning process and that I am assured that I even have the talents and therefore the qualifications that meet the necessities for the masters in Electrical Engineering. I am bound that my passion,ambition and disposition to figure onerous can facilitate Maine to become a booming Engineer.
Saifur Rahman Opu@Saifur Rahman
Hi there. Welcome to the site! I will evaluate your writing.
Aside from what has already been said, the first parts of your essay still need to be compartmentalized, especially in reference to that first paragraph. While I understand that you were trying to insert as much information as necessary in this part, you were still unable to fully flesh out the reasons why this is a program that you are supposed to look after.
The second paragraph is also a bit confusing when it comes to the assessing the application materials. The insertion especially of the last sentence here appears to be a rather baffling insertion in the text. You could have cut it out from the moment you mentioned that you're an electrical engineer - as that would have been a lot more easier to digest for your evaluators.
Be cautious of your: punctuation, capitalization, and the general flow of text. I noticed that you still need to hammer down on creating more technically and academically correct texts.
Overall, work on the organization as well. Try to create a template before you proceed to just writing because this will help you minimize excessive and unnecessary language.
