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Motivational essay: how to conjugate idealism and career goals, Japan?


BlackCapDay 1 / 1  
Jan 23, 2011   #1
Hi! I'm applying to a Japanese university, but it's the first time I write a motivational essay...so please feel free to comment, correct...and copy, if you like it!

Thank you!

instructions:
Write an essay on your motivation for applying to xxx. Please include answers to each of the following questions.
1) How do you expect the education at xxx to contribute to expanding the scope of your personal career and/or goals?
2) How do you think the education at xxx will enhance your possible contribution to solving the problems of your country or the world?

Dear Sir or Madam,
My name is xxx, I am an Italian citizen, and I would like to apply for the Master program in Peace Studies as I want to work in a global environment to make an impact on our society.

My majors at xxx University were Japanese and East-Asia Legal Systems and Economics. I graduated in March 2010 with a total score of 110CumLaude presenting a thesis on the right to strike in Japan. University courses highlighted the linkage among legal environments, economic settings, cultural/social trends and political history in Asia, drawing attention to particular countries which have suffered , and are still suffering, poverty, injustices and misuse of power.

Japan related topics, of course, were abundant and I was on the courses of Japanese History (centered on its role in Asia from the origins up to the current time), Religion and Philosophy in Japan, as well as Classical Japanese Language. However, since school isn't the only way to educate oneself, I read regularly international newspapers and magazines (such as The Economist,

朝日新聞, The Phnom Pen Post, The Washington Post), and I've subscribed to human rights centered organizations to participate to activities and petitions. I'm avoiding using Italian sources owing to the fact that they are deeply affected by censorship and do not focus on foreign issues.

Conversely, studying at xxx I would have the possibility to learn from a different perspective and meet people from around the world ready to exchange opinions and life experiences in order to start an experiment of mutual understanding and help. I'm sure that studying at an environment that is similar to me and enables to confront with people who, in spite of culture differences, shares my ideals and goals would help me to develop my skills at best and create a precious network, a resource for my future work and life. I want to be part of it. Moreover, thanks to xxx's problem-solving approach I would learn how to find solutions to help troubled countries improving their conditions after wars or natural disasters (Cambodia, Haiti, Brazil..), as well as to prevent developed countries (such as Italy) from losing democracy and economic stability.

There are many other reasons why I think xxx is the right place for me.
First because I find very attractive IPSP's attention to individuals' security enhancement and, most of all, to historical and institutional impediments that prevent individuals from realizing their potential capabilities. Many times I've felt that Italian schooling system crisis was stopping me from achieving my goals (first of all, having the possibility to go to university), so I really care about that.

Second,xxx provides that very knowledge I'm looking for on pivotal subjects, such as Globalization, Development, Human Rights and Global Justice. I need to acquire a better understanding of this themes to be able to achieve my career goals: undertake projects aimed at enhancing local access to justice, promoting a wider understanding of human rights and human resource development. In other words, I plan to build a more comprehensive and valuable knowledge thanks to xxx's

courses, on the one hand strengthening and broadening the basis, on the other hand specializing in the fields linked to my future career.
Third, internships listed at xxx's website strongly appeal me (most of all GLOCOM, Greenpeace, IMF, International Peace Bureau, UN Center for Regional Development Nagoya, United Nations University, UN Habitat, and UNIDO) and I'm keen to engage in one of them, since I'm sure it will train my practical skills like no other. By doing so, I plan to start creating a background based on experience, not only on theory. Moreover, considering the fact that xxx has a lot of links with ONGs, Institutions, Banks and so forth, surely it could give me the chance to be part of one of them . I would not be satisfied until I will be working in practical terms. In fact, the career path I'm planning consists in experiencing field work first, in order to achieve anunderstanding in depth of human rights (violations) matters. Then, I would like to organize and monitor new projects as a project manager. Finally, I am determined in changing Italian schooling system, stopping nepotism and creating economic supporting devices to skilled scholars. I'm confident with the fact that I'm going to get ahead gradually, but fast, achieving each one of my goals.

I'm determined in spending my time at IUJ in the most rewarding way, confronting myself with other students, learning from the courses and deepening my knowledge by self study and research. The courses that impressed me the most when I surfed the IPSP page are International Conflict Resolution, International Peace and Security, Human Rights and Global Justice. Also among the electives, Public International Law, International Humanitarian Law and International Law on Recourse to Force particularly appeal me, since I want to develop my background in law further. I want to delve into the leading actors' role in the world order, so I'm interested in courses focused on ASEAN, UN, American, Japanese and Chinese Foreign Policy. Alongside, through courses like International Migration and Cross-cultural Communication/Management, I would like learn how to help people of different cultures and languages to go beyond cultural barriers giving birth to collaboration rather than war and discrimination. About Japan, I like Peace, War and the Development of Modern Japan, Japanese Political Economy and Religion Society and Culture in Japan. Courses from IRP and IDP that I would like to cross-register into are History of International relations, International Economic Systems and Order, Chinese Economy, Contemporary Political and Economic Regionalism. I don't expect to be on all the above mentioned courses, but, being incredibly determined, surely I will do my best to be the best.

There are few research themes I would like to delve into, in particular community training on legal matters, agricultural improvements, access to justice facilities, minorities in China, land grab phenomenon in South-East Asia, reconstruction after conflicts and natural disasters, small scale economic solutions to improve living standards (such as microcredit in India) and the fight against corruption in legal and policy making environment. Especially, I would like to write my thesis on community training programs developed until today in East-Asia primarily on legal matters. The majority of East-Asian countries has been affected, or is still affected, by civil wars and conflicts. As a consequence, a spreading corruption reigns among politicians, public functionaries and businessmen leading to daily human rights violations. Mainly, the victims are poor rural/urban

communities, whose members often ignore their own rights and do not have the possibility to get access to legal procedures to obtain justice. Cambodia is significant example: people are constantly evicted from their lands by illegal means, such as blackmail and violence, and then transferred into slums far from any kind of service. A variety of ONGs and other subjects are trying to train people, giving them the possibility to act legally against misuse of power. My thesis, in particular, after analyzing the birth, evolutions and results of community training programs worldwide, will concentrate on South East Asia area, then, will outline a new integrated training program.

Thanks to xxx's IPSProgram not only will I be capable of adapting to the ever changing global society, but I will also excel at it due to my strong preference for problem solving and analysis. It will also provide me with the right background to promote new sources of wider information and a more meritocratic and democratic education. I do believe education is the basis of freedom, and there is no peace and cooperation without freedom.

Thank you for your time and consideration.
Sincerely,
S.F.
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
Jan 25, 2011   #2
You have a great message, and I hope you will find the way to express it in the first paragraph. If you give too much info in the first paragraph, the reader's attention will be divided by the time you express your message. I think you should tell the reader who you REALLY are right away:

My name is xxx, I am an Italian citizen, and I would like to apply for This is not who you really are.
This is who you really are:
I do believe education is the basis of freedom, and there is no peace and cooperation without freedom. ---This is what you are all about, your motivation for doing this. Talk about this in the beginning so that the reader will appreciate your cause, your motivation. :-)

want to work in a global environment to make an impact on our society. This is not specific enough to be meaningful. It is what anyone entering your field would say. You should say something to distinguish yourself... continue the theme of using education to create peace and improving the world. Keep that strong theme throughout the whole essay.
Tomomi 4 / 15  
Jan 25, 2011   #3
Welcome to Japan.
Your essay is very impressive and different. You seem to be very interested in Asian cultures as well as economics.
When you come here, at first, you will probably experience culture-shock, but I am sure you will get over it.
I will cross my fingers for your admission to Japanese University.

Tomomi
OP BlackCapDay 1 / 1  
Jan 27, 2011   #4
Thank you Kevin, actually you solved the major doubt I had about "priorities"...I didn't realized that I can show them who I am by a simple sentence like that...you know, when you're full of doubts you always look for the most difficult solution...instead of the most true and plane. THANK YOU!!! :))))

Hi Tomomi, thank you, you're so kind...I wish you to fulfill your dreams, too. Japan is a great place to live in...I've studied Japanese in Kyoto for 3 months and, yes, it's been a culture-shock. However, after a couple of week I felt at home...so I'm confident, no fear about it!
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
Jan 27, 2011   #5
major doubt I had about "priorities"

Excellent, that is a good way to think about it. Priorities are important in writing and in all communication, because every additional piece of info divides the listener's attention.

:-)


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