Dear Members
I would be highly grateful if you can provide me feedback on the content of my SOP for admission into a PhD program in OB/HR management.
Following is my SOP
Academicians wield enormous influence in their field, those in business management have opportunity to influence both educational and corporate sector and thus have an impact on society itself. As a researcher their talent for solving intractable problems and ability to think outside the confines of existing knowledge often results in paradigm shift and as a teacher they have the power to both mould and influence future generations. This is the kind of life I envisage for myself. The idea to pursue doctoral studies has evolved with various research experiences I had till date.
I first became aware of my passion for research during the seven months of my dissertation. The day results for my Master's degree were announced, I was thrilled to find that I was awarded Commendation for my research thesis. My mind drifted back to the time I had presented first draft of my proposal to the team of supervisors and course director on the topic "Investigating the effectiveness of Neuro -Linguistic Programming (NLP) in implementation of Total Quality Management (TQM)" .The research intended to analyze employee related challenges which hinder implementation of TQM and whether NLP can help to overcome the said barriers. Considering the scope and level of research I was cautioned that conducting research on this topic posed two serious challenges. First, there was absence of substantial scientific evidence on effectiveness of NLP. Secondly empirical studies regarding utility of NLP within the field of business management were almost nonexistent.
My supervisors were justified in expressing their apprehension because my inability to defend the dissertation would have been fatal to my prospects of completing the degree. I was asked to re-examine my motivation to conduct research on the said topic. After some brain storming sessions with my supervisor and interactions with Ashok Subramanian, (An International NLP trainer) whose research paper and case study on NLP to promote effective Implementation of ISO 9000 was the foundation of my thesis, I realized, that basic tenets of NLP are aligned with my own personal belief and experience that, human excellence is not a matter of chance but it is a matter of choice. This realization gave me a personal motivation to probe whether NLP as a tool can help organizations create an environment that facilitates such choices to improve employee performance in the organization.
My interest, in interplay of various factors within an organization that influence employee performance stems from my personal experiences of living and working in a labor intensive developing economy like India. The global competition, fast rate of technological adaptation has made it clear that superior work force skills and employee performance will go a long way in determining firm's competitiveness and profitability. In my undergraduate research assignment I determined relationship between HR practices and Employee performance and retention in small enterprises in India. As pointed out by Haneman et al (2000) and Haneman and Berkley (1999) the scarcity of literature on impact of HR practices in small enterprises, necessitated me to perform participant observation and analysis of past recruitment records at the firms chosen for the sake of study.
While bearing in mind the significant differences in the economic and social context within which business operate in India and England my study builds upon the evidence presented by Bacon et al (1996) indicating positive impact of defined HR systems on small businesses in England.
Through analysis of past recruitment records and interviews with employees I was able to establish that ad-hoc and informal nature of HR practices results in low employee retention. I outlined four important factors which resulted in ad-hoc nature of HR practices in small enterprises in India. The most prominent reason was that shortage of resources/capital and abundance of labor makes employers increasingly reluctant to invest in training and development initiatives or to have formalized procedure to recruit and manage their work force. Keeping in my mind that many studies(ex: Reid et al 2000)have pointed out that having stringent HR systems may not be viable for a small enterprise this study suggested adopting three key dimensions out of seven identified by J.Pfeffer (Human Equation,1998) . Three factors which were suggested were 1) Having well defined job descriptions and recruitment procedures for the purpose of selective hiring.2) Developing In-house training with one time investment to combat the skill gap. 3) Decentralization of decision making through self managed teams.
The pinnacle of this study came when one of the organizations where I had conducted the study, actually sought the recommendations I had made in my report. My recommendations regarding recruitment and training were successfully implemented and I scored 90% in my research project.
I applied and was accepted to study MSc. in HRM at UCE (Birmingham). The rigorous nature of the program introduced me to the various aspects of HRM and helped me develop holistic perspective of entire business management process through courses like finance, strategic management, and marketing. In each of which I completed individual or group assignments. I also performed an individual study and presentation on Organizational Change Management. For the purpose of presentation, I chose to study two departments within the university which were undergoing a merger. I interacted with the University management acquaint myself with the indented process of completing the merger. Studying this change process and its implications on employees proved extremely valuable during my master's thesis in understanding why major change process like TQM implementation often fails.
Through various workshops carried in HR Lab I became more focused and interested in issues pertaining to Human Resource Development (HRD). Research assignments like "Analyzing the impact of social and cultural factors on Work Practices in India (On the basis of Geert Hoefstede's 5diemesions)" helped me develop critical thought processes along with ability to analyze conflicting views in order to reach a valid conclusion. I thoroughly enjoyed each of these projects; the learning I had through these research studies and prepared me conduct research for my dissertation.
My Master's thesis explored the efficacy of NLP techniques in implementation of TQM and introduced me to the challenge of qualitative analysis. The topic of research was such that it transcended into the realms of organizational work psychology at the same time drawing liberally from strategic management and TQM research and literature. I enjoyed applying interdisciplinary approach to analyze different viewpoints focusing upon central research problem. In order to gain critical understanding of NLP this study evaluated the view point of those who are skeptic regarding existence of NLP. Sharpley (1984 and 1987) and Elich et al (1985) reviewed fairly extensive laboratory research on "Preferred Representation System (PRS)"which is a sub -part of NLP and pointed out lack of consistency in support of PRS. However, this study on the basis of Grinder and Bandler (1975), Dilts and Bonissore (1993) and Sinclair (1992) points out that entire concept of NLP cannot be reduced to analyzing effectiveness of PRS, while, it is Modeling and Meta Programming which is at the core of NLP. By analyzing the information collected from personal interviews of NLP trainers/practitioners like Michael Beale and Sue Knight (one of the key consultant and trainer pioneering the use of NLP in business) and interviewing organizations which had implemented NLP techniques I was ultimately able to demonstrate the extent and scope to which NLP techniques can contribute in the development of human resources.
The seven months of this research study was the most exhilarating time of my life. I discovered an earnest desire to learn and generate new ideas .The thrill of discovery, mastery and focused sense of purpose encouraged me to overcome the inherent challenges (that of lack of empirical research on NLP) of the study. Interactions with key NLP proponents and senior managers and employees at various organizations helped me develop a wholesome perspective on TQM and on practical scope of NLP.
In order to acquaint myself with subtle nuances of academic research and writing, I volunteered as editor for National Accounting Review Journal, published by University of Technology, Mara, Malaysia. This provided me wonderful opportunity to explore and learn about empirical research in an area outside the scope of my interest. My responsibilities included checking and maintaining grammatical consistency throughout the research paper and ensuring meaningful conclusions by amending language based ambiguities. I was also required to ensure that the referencing and bibliography is done according to the Harvard referencing method.
At this point of time I had realized that I wanted to forge my career in research and teaching. However I felt need for strong functional and operational knowledge base before I committed myself to the field of academics. While research experience developed my analytical skills, my work experience in capacity of HR manager and Center Head provided me with strong functional knowledge. Finally after one year of teaching undergraduate students and assisting senior professors I am ready to commit myself to the long but fruitful process of earning a PhD.
My professional as well as academic experience till date has given me ample of opportunity to explore organizational factors which have an impact on employee performance. At XYZ university, I hope to conduct research on how various HR practices can have strategic impact in developing employee competencies and capabilities. I am also interested in exploring issues pertaining to work life balance and would like to explore the scope and extent to which such initiatives are practically feasible especially in context of developing countries like India. The fact that XYZ university encourages students to take electives from other schools like School of Educational Studies, School of Politics and Economics and School of Management, accentuates the importance it places on developing interdisciplinary knowledge and approach in its future scholars. In the current scenario University's stress on interdisciplinary training reflects its futuristic and progressive outlook, thus it is bound to provide me with required expertise and resources to facilitate quality research in my chosen field.
Number agreement:
Academicians wield enormous influence in their field fields. Th ose in ...
this is a nice sentence: This is the kind of life I envision for myself.
Alright, I am very impressed with the way you outline details of your thought processes, particularly concerning the dissertation, because that really proves to the reader that you have undergone rigorous academic training. You are a pro. And you write very well, too, so I want to take you to the next level by talking about brevity. You have more words than necessary. There are a lot of examples:
My professional as well as academic experience till date has have given me ample of opportunity to explore ...
So I think you should go back and kill 1 or 2 sentences in each paragraph. Seriously, kill whole sentences; kill the ones that express an idea you can easily mention in another sentence with the addition of a word or two. Pack the good stuff tightly.
Imagine if you could express all this info in just a paragraph. That is not possible, but if it was possible, it would be a hell of a paragraph. Aspire to that sort of intensity.
Use a semi-colon:
In the current scenario University's stress on interdisciplinary training reflects its futuristic and progressive outlook; thus ...
