I think that first paragraph should have one more sentence added to it. Give it one more sentence to make the main idea of the essay completely clear in the reader's mind.
I believe that industrial engineering studies lead to improvement and finding optimizations solutions for our society problems.
I think you can take out "I believe" and just start the sentence like this:
Industrial engineering studies...
But isn't that an obvious sentence? Of course this is what industrial engineering does. So... I do not think you should use the sentence to say what industrial engineering does. Use the sentence to say something specific about what you would like to accomplish as an industrial engineer.
The last two paragraphs are very professionally written, but they are vague. You say you hope they receive you favorably, but that is obvious... I am interested in this part: "With fruitful achievements, I will return to make my due contributions to my motherland, XXXX, whose industry is in urgent need of development." You should revise the ending of this essay so that it tells more about how you might contribute to society in your home country and also in the other countries you affect.
You have a very professional, impressive style!