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SOP for Master in Data Science; I aspire to teach and research at a university/research center

eosopoku 1 / 2  
May 10, 2021   #1
SOP for MSc - Data Science

Hello Guys,

I am applying for MSc in Data Science. Please review my SOP for me. Thanks in advance!


I want to pursue a Master in Data Science (DS) because I aspire to teach and research at a university/research center in my home country and possibly, abroad. My research interests include cloud computing, wireless sensor networks, and computer networks. Apart from my aptitude, data mining and virtualization have emerged as a tool for massive transformations in agriculture, health, smart cities, and data management. Hence, an MS in DS is the springboard towards realizing this aim as it can expand my contributions in a larger scope. This resonates with the reason I have decided to apply for the master programme at City University of New York (CUNY) as it gives young researchers the platform to build upon their knowledge, skillsets, and research fields and have a positive impact on the world.

I received my Bachelor's degree in Computer Science and Engineering from the University of Mines and Technology, Ghana. My final project was in Sensor Networks, specifically, Human Presence Detection. My strong interest in systems and networks led me to pursue a Master's degree in Computer Science with a specialization in Systems, Networks, and Services at the École Nationale d'Ingénieurs de Tunis, Université de Tunis El Manar, Tunisia. I conducted my research in cloud computing focusing on resource management and power consumption and successfully published an article on it. I have four (4) publications in the areas of cloud computing. Thus, I am equipped with the basic knowledge needed to pursue further studies.

Currently, I am an ICT/IT tutor teaching courses like Networks, Impact of IT on society, Systems Life Cycle, Safety and Security to mention a few. I am an active member of the school's Robotics Club assisting students in coding and assembling devices for the team. Prior to this, I worked as an IT Officer for the Department of Urban Roads, Quaza Solutions, and the National Commission for Civic Education. I also volunteered for International Service - UKAid, championing the campaign for girl-child education in the Northern Region of Ghana. I emerged as the best "All-around volunteer" in my cohort. I am a strong implementer already familiar with some software development technologies and tools such as Java, C/C++, MATLAB, NS3, and Omnet++.

The City University of New York is such a world-class technical university with global recognition in research, education, innovation and scientific advice. An MS in DS is an assured match for my career development and aspiration as it prepares students for the professional experience; to be global technology experts through community engagement. I am fascinated by the extensive curriculum, the small class size that allows one to develop a relationship with professors and the industry, which helps in the assimilation of the programme of study.

As most institutions and companies are moving their data to the clouds, analysing and presenting such big datasets in a meaningful way is of keen interest. Hence, pursuing this programme will equip me with the needed skills for such operations. I am interested in the research works of Professors Ping Ji, Soon Ae Chun; Associate Professors Michael Grossberg, Mayank Goswami and Ashwin Satyanarayana. It would be a great opportunity to study under their tutelage to widen my prospects.

I am mindful of the fact that the Department of Data Science expects elevated standards from its students. I trust that my motivation and the foreknowledge of where I come from will help me to fulfil those expectations. I am anxiously awaiting a long and fruitful partnership with the department to acquire further training and share new ideas with other researchers. I have the skills and aspirations and now seek the enabling environment to move towards my goals, and CUNY is the right choice.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 12,672 4113  
May 11, 2021   #2
in my home country and possibly, abroad.

You are over reaching. focus on your home country instead. Your ambition to leave your home country will not be considered in the discussion. Rather, focus ona purpose related to you home country cover.

My research interests ... and data management.

So what is theactual study focus in relation to the course and purpose ? stop casting a wide net. It makes your statements lack focus and direction.

This resonates with ... on the world.

This not a real purpose. It sounds like you just want to study this course abroad for no particular / specific reason except to get out of your current country.

I have four (4) publications

Name the publications, volume, and date of issue. The reviewers will want to verify this statement.

Your decision to study at C U N Y needs to be specific to your academic and career goals. This is too general and lacks the ability to convince thereviewer that you are goingto be a serious student. specifics are most important in a statement of purpose.

This is a highly problematic presentation due to the general discussions presented. It will not allow you to get past the screening round.
OP eosopoku 1 / 2  
May 16, 2021   #3

Thanks for your comment. I will effect the changes as suggested.
OP eosopoku 1 / 2  
May 16, 2021   #4

Thanks for your comment. I will effect the changes as suggested.

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