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SOP for Masters in CS "An attempt to impress"

Srirama 1 / 4  
Oct 28, 2011   #1
I have always wondered how creativity and intuition come together in the implementation of ideas. An idea can be a powerful motivator; a solution to many problems.I wish to broaden my scope for ideas and apply them intuitively.Innovations challenge the norm,simplify design, offer better solutions to everyday problems and change the way things work. Computer Science, by its very nature is built on the power of such ideas. Computers provide a platform to convert abstract thought processes to concrete form. Therein lies the power of computers. My primary research interest lies in Machine Learning and Networking (especially Cloud Computing). These are the main reasons why I intend to pursue a Masters degree in Computer Science.

During my Undergraduate years, I often noticed more emphasis on theory rather than practical learning or research. It was then that I approached the "Technology Information, Forecasting and Assessment Council" (TIFAC) of our campus, which had garnered attention as being one of the best research organizations in India. I was immediately struck by the possibilities of various real world applications. I was selected to be a part of the team for a project titled "Predictive Texting in Tamil (Indian Regional Language)". I learned how the T9 algorithm worked and how optimization of keystrokes could be done when typing words. We then made a list of frequently used Tamil words and created an algorithm that predicted actual Tamil texts. This was then made into a model and submitted to "Tamil Virtual University" which is designed to be a fast access to education in rural areas, in view of social benefits. The project challenged me to delve deeper into understanding how systems work intuitively.I then began to wonder about the implications of "smart" systems. I recognized that computers were my tools of choice to contribute to the society in a meaningful way.

Driven to contribute more, I created a project on native file sharing in message boards that would allow members to directly share files instead of using attachments in their posts. A global sharing mechanism that can be accessed by genuine users provided a more direct vantage point for the like-minded. I'm proud to say that this project bagged "The Best Project" during our College project fair. My programming skills grew multi-fold and It was this confidence boost that made me consider graduate school.

I decided to enhance the project and prepared a paper titled "Optimization of Knowledge Sharing through Multi-Forum using Cloud Computing Architecture" under the guidance of Prof. N Sankar Ram. The crux of the paper revolved around having a unified login into multiple message boards, and using a cognitive learning agent that would generate threads according to user's preferences. This paper has been selected for presentation at the International Conference on Software and Computing Technology (ICSCT 2011), Singapore.

Inspiration strikes one in the most unimaginable ways. It was during a Skype conference call that I noticed the high jitter in people's voices. I approached Prof. Vijaya Chamundeshwari with an idea to establish dynamic routing of calls in VoIP using cloud-computing architecture by switching between high waiting routers .Under her guidance I co-authored a paper titled "VoIP Call Quality Optimization using Cloud Computing" which was accepted at the International Conference of Computer Applications at Pondicherry, India.

Apart from my academics, I am a prominent member of the math club.Here we organize many workshops demonstrating the essence of mathematics in Computer Science.I was also elected the academic coordinator of my department and helped to prepare, train teams for various technical events like debugging and application development. I had also assumed the role of a coordinator for our prestigious National level Technical Symposium.

I have always endeavored to maintain a balance between studies and co-curricular activities. Focusing on the tasks at hand and proper time management has resulted in an 8.8 GPA; which is among the top 5% of my department. I have also been recognized for the same and awarded certificates of excellence.

After graduating, I would like to work in companies that pioneer in cloud based services to understand the security concerns about "data in the cloud", and set up my own company based on secure cloud solutions in the future.

University of California Santa Barbara is an ethnically diverse university which is a center of excellence for computer learning with student friendly faculty and which stands at the forefront of research in cloud computing. My research interests match with the present research at the RACE lab. I am really interested in learning about cloud computing implementations made by Eucalyptus and AppScale at your University by Prof Chandra Krintz. Since cloud computing is the future, I would love to work on such projects which will motivate me to explore and confront the unknown.I would like to continuously learn and reinvent myself, and a Masters Degree from the University of California Santa Barbara would be a stepping-stone towards achieving that goal.
Rajiv 55 / 400  
Nov 2, 2011   #2
As you have put it, a reader will try to answer the prompt embedded in the title -- does the essay impress ?

That might be what you're trying to achieve, but I do not think it's what you want answered here.

Your writing is fairly good, I am surprised you do not always provide one space after a period ?

The question I have is, are you looking for technical inputs and is that how you're trying to impress; with your interest and knowledge in the subject?

If your concepts are gibberish and only put across eloquently, it will be impressive to the lay reader, which most here are on this subject; but that would be misleading to you, as the evaluator certainly will judge you negatively for any bull-shit you try to pass as content.
OP Srirama 1 / 4  
Nov 2, 2011   #3
Rajiv,you seem to have to got me wrong.
I agree the title is misleading.
I wanted to generally know if it's good enough.
Or any changes need to be made.
I do not want "Technical Inputs".
The title I had put through was without thought.
It's not an essay prompt,It was just a thought of mine.
Still I would like your opinion.
Thank you
Rajiv 55 / 400  
Nov 3, 2011   #4
I don't know if I see any difference between creativity and intuition. I expected you to show how this is.

The next sentence is fine, but not the one after... I wish to broaden..this seems to have little connection with what you've said before or after.

Innovations challenge the norm ... this is fine, but not .. Computer Science by its very nature... by its very nature!
.. how? Isn't everything built on the power of ideas?

Again, the next sentence is alright, but theres an abruptness when you jump to ..My primary research..

Unless the first paragraph itself is clear, why will anyone bother with the rest?
OP Srirama 1 / 4  
Nov 3, 2011   #5
An idea is a powerful motivator; it is often a solution to many problems.Computers have allowed almost every viable idea to develop into a critical success. I wish to broaden my scope for ideas and apply them intuitively.The world of technology is evolving with the influx of ever more innovative ideas.I seek to be a contributor of such ideas.This is one of the reasons I intend to pursue a master's degree in computer science.

This alone should suffice then?
Rajiv 55 / 400  
Nov 3, 2011   #6
I am sorry, but to my mind this is hardly impressive. The other paragraphs actually have more flow, being easier to read. The intro para is not doing the job it should, that is collect the reader's mind and launch him into the rest of the essay.

The original first sentence is quite catchy. You were not able to justify what you said there. I personally dislike all this-

I wish to broaden my scope for ideas and apply them intuitively.The world of technology is evolving with the influx of ever more innovative ideas.I seek to be a contributor of such ideas.

.. what original idea have you expressed, or expressed in an original manner? Your creativity should work here as well, shouldn't it?

You come up with a good first paragraph and I'll edit the rest of the essay for you!
OP Srirama 1 / 4  
Nov 3, 2011   #7
ok thank you for your inputs :)

My writing skills definitely leave a lot to be desired.
How is this for an intro?

Computing as a service has grown to include an amalgamation of many varied technologies. An apt example would be that of the Amazon Silk Browser. Combining multiple emerging technologies, it has revolutionized the notion of web browsing and the speed that dictates it. Focusing on the convergence of path breaking computing technologies like cloud computing, I would like to delve further into such areas and be a part of a new computing era. I believe that a Master's in Computer Science would be an ideal precursor to a career in research of the same.
Rajiv 55 / 400  
Nov 3, 2011   #8
.. would be an ideal precursor to a career in [this] research of the same .

You've made a good impression on me Sriram !
OP Srirama 1 / 4  
Nov 3, 2011   #9
Thanks a lot :)
It matters so much to me.
I hope the rest of the essay looks alright.
Thank you for all your help :)

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