Hi everyone!
Please read through my statement if you have the time - I would appreciate any feedback...did the begining pull you in?...did the middle hold your interest?...also, i think my research interest section sounds a tad confusing...please let me know if you can understand it.
Thank you so very much in advance; I just joined a few days ago and will certainly help out in anyway i can :)
The statement of purpose prompt is as follows:
"indicate your reasons for undertaking graduate study. In addition, please describe your qualifications for the academic program and your objectives in undertaking this program. Applicants to the doctoral program should outline their research interests and how they would complement those of the faculty."
I blew on the wooden surface twice before taking a step back to study my handiwork. It struck me that three years had passed since I had last ventured into the depths of a recently empty closet, to carve my initials into the wood. With this simple act, I finally said my goodbye to Japan and prepared my ten year old-self for the wonders of Egypt.
As my family moved to a different country every few years, comparing cultural and societal customs became instinctive for me. It started off as an amateurish attempt to understand my new environment and to avoid any bumbling faux pas in a new school. However, during my first year in college, I came to the realization that this childhood survival strategy of mine had transformed into a passion.
My first psychology class in college was taken on a mere whim, however it opened up a world of intrigue. From Gestalt principles to identity development, I was unmistakably hooked. Through this course, I was introduced to the idea of gender and identity being socially constructed and culturally specific. This theory fascinated me, as I often found myself applying it to my own cross-cultural upbringing in patriarchical societies. I began to question how one would navigate the development of an identity influenced by the assimilation of multiple cultures.
As a result of subsequent Psychology classes, I began to incorporate a multi-cultural and gendered approach to my undergraduate course work and practical experiences. For my Women in World History term paper, I decided to interview a recently immigrated young Bangladeshi woman. I focused on the woman's formation of ethnic and gender identity over the years and the importance she placed on these two categories in her self-definition. The interview also included how living in the United States had contributed to her sense of self. This assignment brought forth questions, such as the influence of attempting to integrate multiple cultural identities on one's affective mood state.
I also undertook an internship with an NGO in New Delhi, India. My work focused on the mental health needs of low-income women migrating into the city due to employment opportunities. I addressed questions such as the extent of depression in recent female miragnts due to living in an unfamiliar cultural environment. As a part of my internship, I spent time in various New Delhi slums interviewing women on whether they felt out of sync with their peers back home after working and living in the city.
My rigorous undergraduate courses coupled with stimulating internships, have provided me with the necessary analytical tools to succeed in a demanding graduate program. Due to my background in Biology, Chemistry and Psychology, I was expected to carry out both qualitative and quantitative analysis during internships - from utilizing statistical programs, to identifying themes in interviews. Over the past year, I have spent time aiding in the recovery of a family member, due to which I could not work. However, in spite of this, I made time to take computer classes in SAS and SPSS in order to ensure that I remain prepared for graduate school.
My objective in desiring to undertake graduate studies is to develop a solid background in social psychology and gender studies research. I was delighted to learn of the Joint Master of Arts Degree in Psychology and Women's and Gender Studies offered to doctoral students at X University. This would provide me with a concrete foundation in both the disciplines I find equally intriguing. I am eager for a deeper understanding of how to conduct psychological research with a gendered perspective. Furthermore, the integrated approach of the Social-Developmental PhD program will allow for a more satisfying and diverse experience, due to the possibility of incorporating a life-span developmental approach to social psychology scholarship.
My research interest stems from my work with migrant women and the mental health issues many face. I would like to modify the research question addressed during my internship, in order to apply it to American-born Asian adolescents who have lived a highly mobile, trans-cultural life. Specifically, I am interested in examining the risk of depression in early adolescence at the time of repatriation to the United States. I would additionally like to explore the development of ethnic identity in adolescents who have grown up outside their passport country.
I feel that my research interests correspond with those of Dr. Sally Wright, as she is dedicated to examining gender differences in depression through a developmental perspective. Dr. Wright has conducted studies on the relationship between increased depression risk and the onset of puberty in girls. Due to my interest in working with early adolescents and depression, I feel that Dr. Wright's research background fits well with my objectives.
Upon receiving my doctorate, my goal is to continue research related to the influence of cross-cultural experiences in identity formation and risks of depression due to a new environment. I would eventually like to obtain a position either in academia or with an NGO in order to carry on with this work. X University would offer me the enriching opportunity to develop my skills both as a Social Psychologist as well as a Women's and Gender Studies student. I am tremendously excited to combine these two disciplines and explore the different ways in which they can be integrated into research.
My diverse background has instilled in me a passion to fearlessly explore the unknown and I believe, X University, with its multi-faceted approach to research would be the perfect institution for me to explore the areas of psychological research that I find captivating.
I blew on the wooden surface twice and then stepped back to study my handiwork.
...prepared my ten year-old self for the wonders of Egypt. ---> now, this sentence should do more than just introduce the idea of going to Egypt. It should give the theme of the essay, so that the main idea of your essay lingers in the reader's mind at the end of that first paragraph.
I am tremendously excited to combine these two...---> I think you can do better than 'tremendously excited' !!
This stuff, too -- this is sort of meaningless high speech: My diverse background has instilled in me a passion to fearlessly explore the unknown and... The trick is to give one solid impression, something distinct. As this is now, i is a little like your life's story; I suggest going back to the beginning and giving the essay a THEME so that each paragraph tells your story in light of a certain theme. That way, the essay will convey a powerful message through its theme while you tell your story.
Thanks for the advice, Keven - I was a little iffy myself about the autobiographical feel of the essay.
I'll try to work in a theme and then re-post.
You guys are doing a great job here! Especially helping non-native speakers; very commendable stuff!
Iranian psychology student in MA; Scholarship to US
Hello friends
I am an iranian psychology student in MA ,I'm planning to get a scholarship in social psychology in the USA universities . how should I do for that ? what can increase my chance to get it? please answer and help me .
Thanks in advance
Hi Hossein,
Firstly, you should increase your English and maybe try to get Toefl or GRE.
You also go to the Education USA website to find more information about schools, location to find out their offers and requirements which suitable with your background and your ability.
Goodluck!
hi , thanks for your guidance , I'm increasing my language abilities ,I will take an IELTS test nearly I hope to do it
Thanks a lot
