Could you help me editing and proof reading my statement of purpose for MSc Petroleum Engineering at Aberdeen University please? Thanks
Ever since I can remember, I have always enjoyed making thing and learning about the world. As I have grown older, I have realised I am constantly asking myself the same questions, how do things work, why do they do what they do, and how can I do things better. In my opinion, these are some of the fundamental questions constantly asked by engineers, and this is one of the reasons, I have decided to study towards a chemical engineering degree at the University of Manchester. To realise my life-long goal of becoming a professional petroleum engineer, I hope to be considered for a place on the MSc Petroleum Engineering Programme at the University of Aberdeen.
My interest in this area was first aroused during my undergraduate studies where I sought out every opportunity that I could lay my hands on to learn about the role of chemical engineers in the oil and gas industry. Studying Introduction to petroleum engineering module gave me a strong foundation of the field of petroleum production and a systemic understanding of the surface operations. Furthermore, Refinery and Petrochemical Production module has given me a comprehensive understanding of steps, technologies and economics that comprise a modern refinery and the immediate downstream petrochemical processing complex. In both of these modules, I have managed to maintain very high marks (90% and 70% respectively) and earned the respect of my professors and colleagues. My initial interest was further propelled after visiting Offshore Europe 2015 in Aberdeen where the theme of the conference was: inspiring and encouraging next generation of talent into the industry to secure future success. Together with the sheer amount of innovations and technologies displayed in the exhibition, have both reinforced my intense interest for the industry.
Nothing excites me more than the thought of focusing my energy on topics like Reservoir Simulation, Well Testing and Completion Technologies and Enhanced Oil Recovery which will all broaden my knowledge and understanding of the topic as a whole. I am particularly keen to study at the school of engineering in the University of Aberdeen because it is the only School of General Engineering in Scotland, making it a unique place for postgraduate student to gain insight across the whole range of oil and gas industry. The university's enviable international reputation across it is research portfolio together with its strong tradition of success attracts such a variety of students and I believe it will be a stimulating environment in which to study at master's level. Aberdeen university also provides excellent working and recreational facilities for graduate students which demonstrates your commitment to the graduate student body.
My fascination with the richness in the field of petroleum engineering has encouraged me to join the Society of Petroleum Engineers and IChemE's special interest group for oil and gas to learn about the technical knowledge concerning the exploration, development and production of oil and gas resources. I want to be part of new age where petroleum engineers are at the forefront constantly pushing boundaries of technology to solve today's toughest operational and commercial challenges. And joining your highly-esteemed programme and working with the guidance of your devoted faculty will give me the necessary tools to realise my life-long of becoming a professional petroleum engineer.
Hi, your first paragraph seems very general and cliche'. Maybe talk about something more specific that got you interested in chemical engineering? And could you add more detail about why you want to shift from chemical to petroleum engineering? Here are some other suggestions:
I have always enjoyed making thing[s ] and learning about the world.
the same questions[:] how do things work[?] why do they do what they do[?] and how can I do things better[?] In my opinion,
and this is one of the reasons, {no comma here} I have decided to study towards
considered for a place [in] the MSc Petroleum Engineering Programme
Studying [the] Introduction to [P[etroleum [E]ngineering module gave me a strong foundation [in] the field of petroleum production
comprehensive understanding of [the] steps, technologies and economics that comprise a modern refinery
theme of the conference was:{use comma instead of colon and put capitalize the title of the conference and put it in quotation marks} inspiring and encouraging [the] next generation of talent into the industry to secure future success.
Together with the sheer [number] of innovations and technologies displayed in the exhibition, [both have] {although I'm not sure what both refers to here} reinforced my intense interest for the industry.
making it a unique place for postgraduate student[s ] to gain insight across the whole range of [the] oil and gas industry. The university's enviable international reputation across [its] research portfolio together with its strong tradition of success attracts such a variety of students [so that] I believe it will be a stimulating environment in which to study at [the] master's level. Aberdeen [U]niversity
My fascination with the richness [of] the field of petroleum engineering has encouraged me
I want to be part of [a ]new age where petroleum engineers are at the forefront constantly pushing [the] boundaries of technology
