Hello, please give me feedback on my essay and do I need to do any changes.I am applying for Master in Technical Management.
Statement of goals and objectives (one page max.!). Tell us where you see your future.
Introduction: Career Goal
Increasingly, Technological organizations rely for their success on individuals who can successfully mange technical teams. Managers must learn to understand the technology context in which decisions are made, whilst engineers increasingly need a range of management skills. The 'communication gap' between engineers and managers must be closed if they are to work effectively together as team members with a common goal. Thus, my future career goal is to be a technical manager in leading Construction Company and manage complex technical projects.
Objective:
To achieve my career goals, I intend to gain an understanding of issues which are inextricably linked to the technical world, such as project management, Quality Management, Innovation management, global management, and strategic management.
Achievements, Projects and Work Experience
I have been working with Al Nasr Contracting Company, one of the most reputed multi-disciplinary contractor in UAE, handling several prestigious projects, for nearly three years as Mechanical engineer-Projects. During the financial crisis when the projects had dried up and several companies in market were ready to work at low cost. The situation provided lot of challenges for our company. In order to survive the competition we had to provide quality service at competitive prices.
It was during this time we got the tender of waste water treatment plant. The project was very complex and we had no previous experience of such project. I was given the responsibility for estimating for the tender and later to complete the project.
The biggest challenge we faced was how do we maintain the highest quality at competitive price? Three things which I contributed that not only helped win the project, but also complete the project on time with reduced cost. First, I outlined clearly the scope and details of work, understood the complete process design and the technical details of the sewage treatment plant. Second, suggested the company management to subcontract some work for which we didn't have in-house expertise, thus improving quality and reducing cost. Furthermore, managing subcontractor's work and making sure they adhere to the client requirements. Third, I set goals for us to attain at various points in the project and kept our work on track. My efforts were appreciated by the management and I was promoted to senior mechanical engineer-projects.
In addition to my present experience, In my previous job with Grupo Antolin, a Spanish MNC leading in manufacturing of automotive interior's, I had successfully designed a sun visor for Mahindra, India's one of the largest automobile manufacturer, this experience had helped me understand the complete design and development of a product.
Now I feel I have reached a stage in my career where I am ready to move into a leadership position and realized the need to refine my management skills. I want to back my solid engineering experience gathered over the years with valuable insight into the broader management context of engineering. So that I have the capability to accept broader and more responsible roles (both technical and managerial) within an atmosphere of continual change. Post studies I intend to come back to UAE and join a large Construction Company as a technical manager.
I have selected to study in Germany because it one of the largest exporters of mechanical equipments, presence of several reputed engineering companies, and an economy thriving on engineering industry so a master in Germany will expose me to the present and future management practices utilized in the engineering industry specially the mechanical engineering industry.
"...Increasingly, Technological organizations for their success rely on individuals who can successfully manage technical teams..."
It can be more clear if you fix the sentence like this.
If the objective of this essay is just "Tell us where you see your future", then it is okay and almost there is no problem. But it is not then you should modify with the following points:
- Your essay is not bad a bit superficial. You can add some specific features of the university which you want to apply for M.S. Also you can write about the teachers whom you are interested in their research areas.
- And you can tell about yourself more - your workings, certificates, skills. It is important for admission.
The last thing is that do not apply for all of the universities with same SOP. That is why you should give more specific points.
Good luck!
Do not capitalize technological:
Increasingly, Technological technological organizations...
Thus, my future career goal is to be a technical manager in leading Construction Company and manage complex technical projects.
Again, do not capitalize unnecessarily: In addition to my present experience, In in my previous job with Grupo Antolin, a Spanish ...
Now I feel I have reached a stage in my career where I am ready to move into a leadership position, and I realize the need to refine...
I think you might enjoy Jim Collins' discussion of technology's role in his book: Good to Great
:-) Very impressive!!
