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'tropical rainforests of Venezuela' - Statement for PhD in Astrobiology


natinhos 1 / 2  
Jan 23, 2012   #1
Hi! I am currently applying for a PhD in astrobiology which requires a strong background of chemistry. I was asked to write a personal statement/essay and I want your opinion, because in Portugal we are not used to write this type of documents! I am especially afraid about my english and if I am expressing myself properly! Thanks in advance!

"
Living in the tropical rainforests of Venezuela made me an observer and explorer. I remember being particularly amazed by animals and the sloth that lived in my garden's avocado tree really knew how to grab my attention, leaving me wondering about its odd behavior and lazy lifestyle. With the transition from a small agriculture village brimming with natives and nature to Lisbon I shifted my interest in animals mainly to science and music. From that moment on, my major interest is learning and finding explanation for things.

Despite my broad range of interests and aptitudes I realized that chemistry was the right subject for me to study at university owing to its fascinating ubiquity. I would not subscribe that everything is chemistry, but I believe that it is the science that can best fulfill my main interest: explain things. Through chemistry it is possible to explain that the sloth's lazy lifestyle is caused by a slow metabolism or make life changing discoveries such as plastics or life-saving pharmaceuticals.

My university education consists of a BSc in chemistry and a MSc in Biotechnology. With these two programs I learned the major concepts of chemistry, biology and engineering. I also understood the value of interdisciplinary. My scientific background makes me feel versatile, easily adaptable to new scientific challenges as I demonstrated in the second year of my MSc in Biotechnology.

I wrote my research dissertation about the development of drug delivery systems using microfibers composed of gelatin and ionic liquids based on active pharmaceutical ingredients. I remember that my chemistry background was essential to: understand concepts of materials sciences; understand how high ionic liquid concentrations hampered fiber production process owing to high conductivity values; and how the ionic liquids' molecular structures enabled me to perform UV-Vis quantification assays without interference from the polymeric matrix. I decided to write my dissertation in English in order to develop my language skills. I also wrote a paper based on the results and is currently submitted for publication.

While in my BSc and MSc programs I also did part-time work and other activities that allowed me to develop my time management and social skills. I helped with the divulgation of chemistry in open days which included laboratory demonstrations to prospective students. Additionally, I did voluntary work whether it was organizing foodbank's warehouses during food collection campaigns or participate in informative campaigns about AIDS and prevention methods. For almost two years I worked in retail stores and supermarkets.

For leisure I enjoy playing electric guitar, cycling, swimming and reading. Travel is another passion of mine. Between my BSc and MSc programs I decided to travel independently for a year. The most relevant experience from that period was my Ramadan month in North Africa. I fasted for a month like an arab and wandered in the Sahara for weeks. The whole experience was truly remarkable.

My current research interest is focused in developing new methods for the detection and quantification of nitrogen bases and derivates, with especial focus on xanthine, hypoxanthine and uric acid. I have been awarded a scholarship for the development and characterization of enzymatic biosensors to perform an in situ evaluation of fish freshness. This project demands me to perform several tasks, including ionic liquid synthesis, structural analysis and evaluation of the electrochemical behavior of nitrogen bases, enzymes and electrodes modified with polymeric matrixes.

My first contact with astrobiology was through a conference given by Dr. XXXXXX in Lisbon during my BSc. Since then I have been following the subject with interest and I had especial pleasure reading his paper published in 2008 about the organic content of the XXXXX meteorite and the carbon isotopic measurements. The presence of organic molecules in meteorites and the suggestion that our DNA and RNA building blocks can have an exogenous origin enraptures me. I think it is enthralling to think that chemistry can rewrite history or truly explain for the first time the way we see life and its origin in our planet.

My short-time goal is to enroll in a PhD program of a major research center, so I can be stimulated towards constant learning and excellence. The idea of studying an exciting subject, learning new things and the possibility of contributing for the elucidation of the origin of life in our solar system is certainly appealing for my personal and professional development. Plus, the idea of working with Dr. XXXXX, the fact that I am already familiar with molecules that can be found in meteorites, studying in a world top university like XXXXXX and living in a city like XXXXX are clearly strong incentives.

I am confident that my multidisciplinary background, the experience that I am acquiring in analytical methods, my adaptability and autonomy suit me well for the astrobiology projects that I am applying to. Moreover, I believe that I can gain a lot from a possible experience in an exciting project at XXXXXX in terms of curriculum and future prospects in the academic world. However, the most important motivation is the chance of learning and apply my chemistry knowledge to an area that is, literally, out of this world!"
Jennyflower81 - / 690 96  
Jan 23, 2012   #2
Here are some changes that I can suggest:

I remember being particularly amazed by animals and the sloth that lived in my garden's avocado tree, who really knew how to grab my attention, leaving me wondering about its odd behavior and lazy lifestyle.

With the transition from a small agriculture village brimming with natives and nature to Lisbon I shifted my interest in animals mainly to science and music. From that moment on, my major interest is learning and finding explanation for things.

You could say: "I made the transition from a small agriculturefarming village brimming with natives and nature, to Lisbon, where I shifted my interests to science and music. From that moment on, my major interest is learning and finding explanations for things.

Also, ending the sentence in "for things" is a bit vague, you may want to end this sentence and paragraph with a bolder statement.

Despite my broad range of interests and aptitudes, I realized that chemistry was the rightbest subject for me to study at university,owingdue to its fascinating ubiquity. I would not subscribeclaim that everything is chemistry, but I believe that it is the science that can best fulfill my main interest: explain things.

Through chemistry, it is possible to explain that the sloth's lazy lifestyle is caused by a slow metabolism, or make life changingcrucial discoveries such as plastics or life-saving pharmaceuticals.
OP natinhos 1 / 2  
Jan 24, 2012   #3
Thank you! I am afraid that the first part is precisely a bit vague, but that was precisely my objective back then. That's why I give the two examples in the next paragraph. Is the rest of the statement any good?
Jennyflower81 - / 690 96  
Jan 24, 2012   #4
You are correct-- this is a major theme in your essay, and you follow through with it nicely. I only suggest that you may want to choose different words in that statement, but what you are saying is fine. You have written a very interesting and intelligent paper. I am sure the college will be lucky to have a student as enthusiastic as you :)

These sentences really provide the root of your desire to learn/study Chemistry... so focus on these, and make sure they stand out for the reader.

From that moment on, my major interest is learning and finding explanation for things.

I would not subscribe that everything is chemistry, but I believe that it is the science that can best fulfill my main interest: explain things.

I think it is enthralling to think that chemistry can rewrite history or truly explain for the first time the way we see life and its origin in our planet.

(I scratched out "I think" here because it sounds redundant)
OP natinhos 1 / 2  
Jan 24, 2012   #5
Thank you very, very much!


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