"... so just bear with me" - Stanford letter to roommate

Dear Roommate,

There's no better time than the present to start apologizing for the future, so here goes. I'm sorry about my family. My father will try too hard to befriend you, and trust me, I don't expect you to remember the names of my parents, step-parents, four younger stepsiblings, and three older brothers. You should probably remember my dog Tucker's name though, since photos of him will be plastered all over our walls. I'm terribly sorry for my awful memory. I will lose my keys and get locked out at the most inconvenient times, and you will grumblingly (and graciously!) let me in. Also, I'm sorry about the Swedish fish that you'll find casually scattered all over our dorm. Eventually, after finding Swedish fish in random pages of your textbooks, under your pillow, and inside your shoes, you will accept their presence. I just really hope you're not allergic to them. I apologize for my insane piles of books that will transform our dorm into a library. You can borrow any you like, and I'm a rare reader who doesn't mind dog-earring the pages! Oh, roommate, let me warn you now, I have a strange incapacity to take the "am/pm" setting into consideration. I'm so sorry for all the times I distract your routine with my Spice Girls wake up song. It must be terrible for you. I'm sorry if my Salvador Dali paintings seem like walking nightmares. Granted, they take some getting used to, but I bet that by the end of this year, you will love his weird chicken-like elephants and enflamed giraffes just as much as I do! If I lose that bet, we can discuss some sort of revenge on me. Dear roommate, I am sorry that I will insist upon telling you my dream right after we wake up. Sometimes they're really weird and involve characters from Harry Potter, so just bear with me. (I don't know how to end it succinctly because I can't go over in characters!)

hi maggie
i read your essay but do you want say sorry to roommate before getting with him/her or you have roommate and you want say sorry about inconvenience time with your roommate because you used will means future but the event seems that are happened i think it is better don't repeat i am sorry you can say i am sorry for,... and write your reason

good luck:)

Hi Maggie

This is funny and lovely - at first. However, the repeations of "I'm sorry, I apologize..." may need to be reduced.

Hmmm... you seem to be the most interesting person in the world...

I was opening up a bunch of tabs with essays to look at, and this title caught my eye. I skipped ahead to correct it, but it does not need any correction.

The first sentence really interested me.

we can discuss some sort of revenge on me. ---hahahahaha!!

Mark, I had to google to see if enflamed is okay, and apparently it is, though it seems like it would not be. Your corrections always good... at this part, though, I prefer it without the added word "if" ---can borrow any you like, and ----- and I have to say, I like the word grumblingly. Every essay should have at least one intuitioningly made-up word.

:-)

Wow Maggie!!

This is great stuff! Very witty and very funny!
If I were you, I wouldn't change a word. There isn't a single sentence which failed to capture my attention. This really is one of the best essays I've seen on this site. :)

Hi Maggie,

This is what I like to see! I like to see students re-post their essays on this site, as you have done. And, you made the corrections that were needed and took those suggestions that you thought were appropriate and incorporated them into your essay. You are a wonderful writer, and like Ershad has said, you are also very witty! It is a very amusing essay, and it captures the reader's attention, right off the bat. I certainly would not change a thing with the essay. Job well done!

Mark

:)

This is such a great idea! I wouldn't change anything, and if you feel the end is kind of abrupt, maybe you could add a PS at the end