Reflect on an idea or experience that has been important to your intellectual development:
Science saved my life. It is with the growth of science and medicine that I could live normally to this day. As an infant, I was stricken with bacterial meningitis, a rare and life-threatening brain and spinal cord disease. Typically caused by penicillin-resistant organisms, bacterial meningitis has terminated many lives of both young and the elderly. Although there is a range of symptoms for this disease, I personally experienced intense vomiting, altered mental status, and back and neck stiffness. To treat this horrid disease, I received spinal taps, inserting of needle in the lower spine to withdraw cerebrospinal fluid, daily for almost three months to check for pressure and levels of white blood cells and bacteria. Although I went through this as a three-year-old, I am still thankful for the development of science that saved my life. Had I been born even a decade earlier, I may have surrendered to this fatal disease and would not have had a chance to go to school, play music, or live a normal life. It fascinates me how science is always changing. With daily new discoveries, science is a field in constant motion. While I do not recall any of my past struggle with this disease, the more I research the disease that almost conquered me the more I am thankful for my present life. My inquiry about my past disease opened my eyes to other deadly diseases around the world. For instance, I found out that Alzheimer's disease, a brain disease suffered by my own grandfather, strikes 50% of those who passed their eightieth birthday. It is becoming increasingly more impactful on the society. I want to fight for prevention of diseases all over the world to stop unnecessary deaths and disabilities. I truly feel that I have been given a second chance at my life to contribute something to the world. Just like the doctor that rescued my life, I am determined to become lifesaving physician.
Please feel free to give me truthful criticism and advice :D
Thanks!
Your experience is very inspiring and this was very well written! I think you could reflect on it more though. Since you have over 100 words left until you reach the word limit, you should expand on how this disease has affected you.
In my class I recently learned about lumbar punctures and since you want to be a physician and you are using the scientific names for almost everything else, maybe you can write lumbar punctures instead of spinal taps to make things balanced. That is just my two cents though.
Overall, good job and good luck! It would be great if you could take a look at my essay!
the overall essay is very moving and upliftng. however, you only describe how science saved you and inspired you. The question needs you to explore more about your intellectual development. Therefore, I think you should add something about the relation between your disease and intellectual development. Maybe my idea is not deep or typical.
good luck to you.
