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Reciting a poem backwards. Lehigh. You've just reached your one million hit on your youtube video.


alexgzm 5 / 17 9  
Dec 25, 2016   #1
Hey everyone, I hope you could help me with some comments and constructive criticism for this Lehigh supplemental essay, I tried talking about a weird talent I have to make it more personal. The essay should be 150-250 words.

Thanks!

MY TALENT



Eht oediv dluow eb fo em gniticer a meop sdrawkcab.
The video would be of me reciting a poem backwards.

I acquired this quirky talent when I was around 8 years old and started playing a game in my head where I would look for license plates in which the three letters of the plate added had the same value as the three numbers added. With this game I developed the ability to change the letter's order in a word, which somehow led to me being able to flip over any word in my head as soon as I hear or read it.

At first I would practice in my head and didn't show this skill anyone because at the age of 8, I thought a strange talent like that would condemn me as a freak. But later on I realized its actually traits like this that make a person unique and instead of trying to hide them, we should foster them because they add up to one's singularity.

Now I like to challenge myself with the help of my friends so that I keep improving this quirkiness, my biggest challenge so far has been reciting a Jorge Luis Borge's poem backwards in Spanish class. I can only do this correctly in Spanish but I've been working on my backwards English as well.

Youtube is full of weird and amazing talents which is why I believe mine would be a good addition to the repertoire.
mualla 19 / 92 28  
Dec 25, 2016   #2
Hi Alexgzm,

Very interesting talent! I don't know if it comes as a skill with birth or that is it learned?

The first thing I noticed is you have very long sentences that can be cut into 2 or 3 short sentences:

Example: I acquired this quirky talent when I was around 8 years old and started playing a game in my head where I would look for license plates in which the three letters of the plate added had the same value as the three numbers added.

You may correct this sentence: "But later on I realized its actually traits like this that make a person unique and instead of trying to hide them, we should foster them because they add up to one's singularity."

as

But later on, I realized that traits like this make a person unique; therefore instead of trying to hide them, I should foster them because they add up to one's skills.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,797 4780  
Dec 25, 2016   #3
Alex, you have a misunderstanding of the prompt requirement. Although you posted an incomplete version of the prompt (Please post the complete version as soon as you can), from experience with the others here who have responded to a similar prompt, what you are being asked to discuss is the kind of public persona that you are willing to share with the student campus and your professors. What unique quality or trait will you have shared with them via Youtube? In your version, you have not uploaded any video yet and you have yet to actually start your Youtube channel. In the version of the prompt, the video is already up and has gone viral. What were the qualities of your video or your video performance that contributed to it turning viral? That is the discussion that the reviewer is interested to know about. What quirky talent do you have that would make you an asset to the university as the next Youtube sensation?
OP alexgzm 5 / 17 9  
Dec 26, 2016   #4
@Holt

You're right, I only posted half of the prompt, the entire prompt is: You've just reached your one millionth hit on your YouTube video. What is the video about?

I understand what you're trying to say, could you help me give that tone to my essay but maintaining the same performance. What you're saying is that I should explain sort of why the video became viral and how can that relate to Lehigh?

Thanks for all your help and also thank you a lot @mualla

@Holt

I did changes to the essays according to the comments made and I think it got the desired tone, but still, I would love some more suggestions and comments on it:

Eht oediv swohs em gniticer a meop sdrawkcab.
The video shows me reciting a poem backwards.

I acquired this quirky talent 10 years ago. I used to play a game in my head that consisted in looking for license plates where the letters added had the same value as the numbers added. This game led to me being able to flip over any word in my head just by hearing or reading it.

...
nandasharma 14 / 53 9  
Dec 26, 2016   #5
@alexgzm
It's still not about your talent that you learned when you're little. The prompt is directly asking you about how you utilize the Youtube service. Imagine you made a video about something that was productive for a lot of people/students, not just something about your freaky talent. Think much deeper and state what would you use as your video content that impacted several lives. Then, repost your essay agian.

Best.
OP alexgzm 5 / 17 9  
Dec 26, 2016   #6
Hey, @nandasharma

I get what you mean and I believe you're right, the reason I did it that way was because I read in a college essay help page called CollegeVine that Lehigh was literally "begging" to take out my weird side with this essay and that I should show them something that they could never know about if it weren't from this essay, they even gave the example of an essay of someone who did its essay of a video of him dancing when he was little to an embarrassing song; that's why I went with such a weird knack.

But I realize you are also right with your points of what they're asking me, so I'm really in a middle point of if I should change the essay completely or not.

@Holt @nandasharma
I changed again the essay now trying to follow the idea of how my videos would enrich the community or how they could help. Here it is:

Eht oediv swohs em gniticer a meop sdrawkcab. (Invert it)

I acquired this quirky talent 10 years ago. I used to play a game in my head that consisted in looking for license plates where the letters added had the same value as the numbers added. This game led to me being able to flip over any word in my head just by hearing or reading it.

A year ago I opened a channel where I present poems backwards to promote poetry to young generations, who seem to have forgotten about it. I also explained techniques to improve backwards speaking. With this, viewers can broaden their knowledge of poetry and gain practice on an unusual skill. A non-traditional way of learning.

At first viewers don't understand the poem because it's backwards, meanwhile I record everything with an app that inverts audio. When I finish reciting the poem, I play the reverse audio so the actual poem is heard, give a small analysis of it, and show how to improve fluent backwards speaking.

My last video went viral because I recited my favorite poem from Jorge Luis Borges, "Poema de los Dones". It's about how going blind was both a gift and a punishment, Borges couldn't read anymore, but thanks to this he created most of his literature. The idea that beautiful literature came out from something so gloomy, related perfectly to my videos where poems come out from weird sounds of backwards speaking.

Passions with a unique touch create success.

Hope you can help!
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,797 4780  
Dec 26, 2016   #7
Alex, when you discuss this talent of yours, it is important that the reader understand the kind of audience that your video, based upon this talent is meant for. What is the demographic involved here? Explain how you developed this fan base and then, only after that, can you present the video that went viral for you. That way, the talent and how it developed becomes less important than the actual point of the essay which is "What is the video about?"

In response to the prompt, you actually gave an answer on 2 fronts. The first is "The video is about my talent of speaking backwards." The other is the explanation about who wrote the poem and why it made for an interesting video to present on Youtube. If this is an actual thing that happened, please make sure to mention the number of views, likes, and positive comments that you got. It will help show that there is a real interest in this kind of work. Don't forget to provide the url to your channel in the section that will allow you do that. Just so they can see the talent for themselves.


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