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The lack of discipline in universities is a serious problem today


Oscar Tam 2 / 3 2  
Feb 24, 2018   #1
Writing topic: Discipline is an ever increasing problem in modern schools. Some people think that discipline should be the responsibility of teachers, while others think that this is the role of parents.

Discuss both sides and give your opinion.


schools discipline is non-existent



Currently, there are many news about the non-comply discipline which came from universities in Hong Kong. The discipline problems of our Hong Kong students should be seriously concerned by the Hong Kong society. However, the responsibility in terms of discipline should be focusing on the parents either their schools' teachers that also be a question.

Most simply concept to think about the problem above I would like to say that the Hong Kong students were originally as same as the white papers and easily absorbed the standard of discipline from different media. Two most related media to them were their teachers and parents when they are at their young age. The discipline can be adopted whether in their lifestyle which related to their parents or the rules of their school that related to their teachers. Most of them mentioned above should be the same level of importance. So how can we say the responsibility of discipline should be unbalance to a bias for any one side of them? It is not fair.

The role model of discipline should be cooperatively created by both parents and teachers. When their children are still young, they can teach them how to enjoy their lunch and dinner with polite manners, such as a buffet either self-service hot pot, discipline is very important to respect other customers. Even though they are waiting for the buses or minibusses, they also need to queue into a row with discipline. In the classes whatever primary school, secondary school as well as the university, they also are required to respect other classmates if those are listening to their teachers or lecturers. Shouting and eating strongly smelled foods in the classroom is a behavior with disrespectful to others. The lifestyle either the teaching class can actually change the discipline standard in minds of our students. Therefore, teachers and parents should be responsible to foster the high standard of discipline to their students and children respectively., no one should ignore it. Otherwise, the misunderstanding concept would be growth in their mind and affect their future.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,767 4771  
Feb 25, 2018   #2
Long, you will not get a passing grade for this essay. The main reason for the failure of your essay is that you show a lack of understanding of the prompt requirements. While this is an opinion paper. It is not solely a personal opinion paper. The prompt required you to discuss both points of view, as indicated in the original prompt topic, prior to your discussion of your personal point of view. Since you solely discussed your personal point of view throughout the paper, you failed to properly represent the TA section of the scoring consideration. Since the TA accounts for a large percentage of the scoring, since it is used to judge your ability to understand and execute English instructions, your failure to properly represent the prompt paraphrase and the actual discussion in your essay will result in a failing score for this essay.

The essay is also improperly formatted as it has only 3 paragraphs when the requirement is 5 paragraphs. You posed questions in the essay which you were not able to properly respond to as a developed part of your essay. Your slant of discussion is nowhere near the required discussion. Therefore, there is no way that this essay can garner a passing score. Read the other essay samples at this forum for the Task 2 test. Familiarize yourself with the different prompts and response styles using the work of others as your guide. You should see improvement in your work once you do that.


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