Dear Sir or Madam,
Herewith I am writing to express my interest in applying for a master's degree in International Relation. I believe my experiences and my educational background would enable me to become competitive candidate as a great student on University of XXX and make a great contribution at the campus.
Being a diplomat is a big dream for me. When I was start internship at Ministry of Foreign Affairs Republic of Indonesia, I knew that I will be part of it. My life was changed, I want to be a diplomat. As I thought, a diplomat is the key representative for a country in abroad. Their decision will be affect to their country, whether that good or not. That is so powerful. Since then, I try to keep update with international issues. This passion has been strength when I began wrote my undergraduate thesis, Hallyu as a Soft Power in South Korean's Tourism Promotion. I found this subject is really interest, powerful. I can make a change with this, soft power.
I have graduated from University XXX, Faculty of XXX and got bachelor degree in Korean Studies. My academic performance has been good. I believe my education background is an advantage for me. I learnt Korean Language, Culture, Social, History, and their Politics. Basically, I know about politics in general. Thus, my knowledge about the others studies (culture, social and history) will help me to understand about international relation study is, because this subject not only learns about politics, they related each others.
Since I was in University, I am actively joined in some faculty based organization, campus event, local and international event. In last year I was joined as volunteer in Conference on Foreign Policy 2015 conducted by Foreign Policy Community Indonesia. On this event, many politician, ambassador, and public figure join as speaker. Mr. Moazzam Malik, United Kingdom Ambassador to Indonesia, ASEAN and Timor Leste is the one who came to this event as a speaker. Such an honor to met him. Another experience is, as a volunteer in Europe on Screen 2014. That was great experience. I met new friends from another background, met film lovers. This event is sort of Europe's soft diplomacy. In this way, Indonesians, will know and interest with European's culture, and it is not possible slowly fall in love with them, just like me.
To develop my leadership, I have been a supervisor to Student Cooperation of Faculty of XXX, Universitas XXX. I managed for Public Relations's Division. I evaluated their work and discussed with Head of this divison about their problem, and try to solve that problem together. Before that, I have been a staff for Developement Student Resources, Student Excecutive Board of Faculty XXX, Universitas XXX.. I made some event for a whole Student Excecutive Board tim to build up and tighten our relation. With good relation, we can work together well with harmonious.
I also concern with education. I have been joined with some social activities to teach street children in Depok and Manggarai. From them I learnt about life, not everyone have a good life as much as me, make me realize that I have to be grateful for everything.
In my leisure time usually I read some books, do dancing or traveling. I love all of them. When I was in high school, I joined Saman dance club, Indonesian traditional dance from Aceh. For almost 2 years I performing and going to competition. I am very proud that I can learn this dance. When I have a chance to study abroad, I can introduce one of Indonesian culture to my community.
The reason I take master and choose this subject is, I want to contribute to my beloved country, and I choose to be a diplomat who will concerns on culture and education, specifically. Also, I intend to share my knowledge and my expertise by becoming a guest lecturer in my alma mater, University XXX or in University of XXX. Share my knowledge to Indonesian next generation, plant my hope to them to make Indonesia better than ever.
I believe study in the United Kingdom and University of XXX will developing my leadership ability, bring influential and excellent network, having international experience, and internationally recognized degree. Those advantages will give me more opportunities in the future to be influential person in Indonesia. After all the research, I know that University of XXX is where I want to build my great life and great career.
When I was start internship at Ministry of Foreign Affairs Republic of Indonesia,
correction : when i was in internship program at...
I knew that I will be part of it
correction : i knew that i would be a part of it
My life was changed, I want to be a diplomat
for this sentence, i think you should use the same tense (simple past).
whether that good or not
less verb. correction : whether that is good or not.
Their decision will be affect to their country
you should use bare infinitive.
Since then, I try to keep update with international issues
i think, it'd better to use past form, because you use since then, so it will be followed by past form.
i found so many grammatical errors, especially for verb tenses.
