bubbleboo
Dec 23, 2020
Undergraduate / UWATERLOO - HELP AIF FOR MECH ENG, MATH, CS [5]
I feel like you should elaborate on why this program will help YOU, why it ties into YOUR goals and ambitions. For example, you talked about Co-op but didn't really elaborate on how or why it would help you. You're showing that you've done a lot of research about your program and Waterloo (which is great) but it's not really talking about you or your goals. Also the last sentence doesn't really make sense to me. Other than that, I think your paragraph is good, you just need to connect your points and take out some unnecessary info. Lastly, I feel like this question shouldn't really be answered on a research based way. Talk more about yourself and your goals. You can show that you've done research on the Engineering section of the AIF.
The Engineering IDEAs Clinic, the Sedra Design Centre, and its Rocketry Team are of specific interest to me; the opportunity provided by these playgrounds validates that Mechanical Engineering at Waterloo is the next step in accomplishing my goals.
This sentence is another example where you could elaborate on or even take out and talk about in the Engineering section
I feel like you should elaborate on why this program will help YOU, why it ties into YOUR goals and ambitions. For example, you talked about Co-op but didn't really elaborate on how or why it would help you. You're showing that you've done a lot of research about your program and Waterloo (which is great) but it's not really talking about you or your goals. Also the last sentence doesn't really make sense to me. Other than that, I think your paragraph is good, you just need to connect your points and take out some unnecessary info. Lastly, I feel like this question shouldn't really be answered on a research based way. Talk more about yourself and your goals. You can show that you've done research on the Engineering section of the AIF.
The Engineering IDEAs Clinic, the Sedra Design Centre, and its Rocketry Team are of specific interest to me; the opportunity provided by these playgrounds validates that Mechanical Engineering at Waterloo is the next step in accomplishing my goals.
This sentence is another example where you could elaborate on or even take out and talk about in the Engineering section