Posts by krempetkov

krempetkov

Nov 23, 2016

Writing Feedback / Essay about an opinion regarding traditional festivals [2]

First, i believe It is better to separate the paragraphs - Don't combine the conclusion and your 3-rd paragraph.

... traditions and customs playED a quintessential role in life.

...a special event happened in their own history. - This doesn't sound well to me, i struggle to understand what do you mean.

... Also, the festival creates a sense of belongingness ...

...No longer ~~do they~~people rely heavily on these traditional events to ~~feel that belongingness~~to show their appreciation to their conuntires/roots.

I do not completely agree that most people perceive the festivals, as an opportunity to enjoy themselves/have fun/have a good time.

Young generation may not remember the original story behind the festival, but they still appreciate what festivals bring to them. - Stay in plural form - ...stories behind the festivals.

Overall, i think your essay is quite good.

krempetkov

Nov 22, 2016

Writing Feedback / Solutions and cause of the loss of bio-deversity [3]

Influence of human beings on the world's ecosystem is leading to the extinction of species and loss of bio-diversity.

What are the primary causes of loss of bio-diversity?

What solutions can you suggest?

The diversity of bio-organisms and animal species is an essential part of our nature and environment. Nowadays, because of the human's influence on the world's ecosystems, many animals and plants are facing extinction. Proceses like deforestation and the Climate changes are the main causers of the lost of bio-diversity. With that said, it is still not late for the humanity to take actions and find a solution, which can tackle this problem.

Since the beginning of the 20-th century, we live in the era of industrialization. As we continue to burn fossil and polute the environment, many animals will to loose their natural habitats. For example, due to the rising tempreatures at the North Pole, caused by the Global Warming, the ice there continues to melt and makes it impossible for the white bear to survive. Furthermore, nowadays many animals struggle to adapt in this fast changing environment created by the human's actions.

On the other hand, the recent improvements in most of the technological areas provide us with numerous oppotunities to solve the problem. If we as a kind, succeed in creating a renewable and clean energy, we can definitely take control of the climate changes. Moreover, we can diminish the problem with the deforestation and even begin to plant more trees, with which we can preserve the natural animal habitats. In addition to this, everybody can start to recycle their wasted products and use the internet to check the news instead of buying newspapers, which can save a lot of energy and stop the mass cuts of trees.

In conclusion, i think that the humanity still have a chance to save and rescue many animal species of extinction. But in order to do that, we should transform our societies into more enviromentally friendly and cautions one's