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Posts by thinhtvdhtm
Joined: Sep 17, 2009
Last Post: Jan 29, 2010
Threads: 41
Posts: 97  

From: Viet Nam

Displayed posts: 138 / page 2 of 4
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thinhtvdhtm   
Oct 22, 2009
Writing Feedback / studying the past has little value. do u agree or not? why? [2]

i am preparing for ielts, i am really worried about my writing, could u help me check for my mistakes? thanks so much

To some people studying the past has little value in the modern world. Why do you think it is important to do so?
I wholeheartedly disagree with this opinion that studying the past has no value in modern society, because the development nowadays is as result of the accumulation of experience and knowledge in the past. Learning the things that happened in the past brings us many benefits in our life.

First of all, studying the past helps people avoid repeat mistakes that happened in the past. As we know, during the war world I and II, millions of people died and war destroyed everything in the world. When people learn about war in the past, they can see clearly that there was no benefit from war, and it even damaged the life, which help people avoid repeating mistakes which done in the past. Furthermore, people can understand the importance of peace and treasure it.

Moreover, people can improve their living standards through inventions in many fields which are based on the knowledge and experience accumulated from the past. For example, people could have produced electricity if there had been no inventions of electron line of Pharaday. Based on this invent, people now can create electricity to improve the life quality.

Last but not least, learning the past help people make plan for the future better as well as be able to see and understand practice better. Take the global economy crisis as an example, people in around the world have recently confronted with depression in economic field. Thanks to economists who showed us that there is a economic cycle, and people can know that the world economy is now in the bottom of its cycle. Through understanding this cycle, people can perceive this issue and make conscious decisions, policies to cope with this problem as well as create plan for the economies in the future.

To sum up, it is really worth studying the past. Achievements which humankind have acquire in modern society are based on the accumulation of knowledge and experience from the past. Learning the past not only improve humankind's living standard, but also help people make smart plan for the future.
thinhtvdhtm   
Oct 21, 2009
Writing Feedback / life in prison is better punishment than death penalty [5]

good morning EF_Sean
i think when a person kill another, it is inhumane.

Why didn't she put them up for adoption? Or ask a friend to look after them? Also, wouldn't this woman be able to mount an insanity defense? That is, this isn't the sort of case that would normally provoke the death penalty anyway.

because, she decided to do that when she was in bad condition, she could make any conscious decision as well as the consequence of her decision.
thinhtvdhtm   
Oct 21, 2009
Writing Feedback / How people can gain job satisfaction?/ Factors contributing to job satisfaction [5]

i am preparing for ielts, howeve my writing is not good, please, check for me as much as possible, thanks so much

As most people spend a major part of their adult life at work, job satisfaction is an important element of individual wellbeing.
What factors contribute to job satisfaction?
How realistic is the expectation of job satisfaction for all workers?

In modern society, people are becoming busier; they always try to develop themselves as well as acquire achievement in their careers. And satisfaction in the career is one of the most important elements of individual wellbeing. How people can gain job satisfaction and whether all workers can be satisfied with their work is controversial. In this essay, I will analyze several factors among a number of factors which contribute to job satisfaction and the reality of working satisfaction for all workers.

People can be satisfied about their work in many different ways. Personally, I think that opportunity to develop their capabilities is one of the most essential factors which influence on satisfaction in career. People will be more satisfied when they have chances to show their abilities as well as to master and improve their talents. Furthermore, salary is also an important factor affecting on satisfaction in work. No matter how high position people are in their organization, they cannot be satisfied if their incomes are not enough for their life and their family. Satisfied material demands is one of the most essential factors contributing to get working satisfaction. Last but not least, people are more likely to be satisfied about their jobs when they work with passion; because, enjoyment at work comes with satisfaction.

In fact, some people work in some fields without enjoyment; consequently, it really difficult for all workers can be satisfied in their working life time. Even though they know well that they do not suit to that work, they still work for; because, they do not have any other choice. Taking my cousin for an example, he is working for a limited company. He often says to me that he hate working for a bad boss like his boss now; however, he still work there due to high salary.

In conclusion, to achieve working satisfaction is an important part of working life time for every one. However, how to be satisfied depends on each person's view. Nowadays, there are many factors contribute to job satisfaction, and it really hard for all employees to be satisfied about their jobs.
thinhtvdhtm   
Oct 21, 2009
Writing Feedback / Contrast viewpoints of the author and the lecturer about using cell phone [4]

The author states that cell phones not only make our life more comfortable, but also causes accidents by neglecting drivers. The lecturer, in contrast, argues that using cell phones when driving is not the only one reason createscreating accidents. She says that we should have a look at the fact
thinhtvdhtm   
Oct 18, 2009
Writing Feedback / life in prison is better punishment than death penalty [5]

i am preparing for ielts, my writing is bad, could u hepl me check for grammar, sentence structures and ideas, thanks so much

By punishing murderers with death penalty, society is also guilt of committing murder. Therefore, life in prison is a better punishment for murderers.
To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement


In the 18 century BC, death penalty was used at first time, and at that time, people listed detail how a person could be put to death if she or he did not obey the rules. Until now, this kind of punishment is still used in most of countries in the world. Some people think that this kind of punishment is too inhumane, so government should abolish the capital punishment. Personally, I definitely agree with this opinion for several reasons below.

First of all, there is no one has the right to take other one's life away. People are born by God, and God is only person who has this right. Human beings should not kill human beings. Even if criminals have committed horrible crimes, the government does not have the right to execute them. Taking those people into prison is a good solution; because this is a deserved punishment for their crimes and this kind of punishment is much more humane than capital punishment. This type of punishment is strong enough to make scare in criminals' minds.

Furthermore, most criminals have committed crimes when they cannot control themselves or they cannot think about the consequences of their own actions. In fact, many people have committed crimes when they are angry. For example, I read a story about a woman who killed her children by herself. She did love her children, however her husband left her and lived with other woman and did not care of his wife and children. She though that she would kill herself, she wondered that who would look after her children when she was away, and she decided to dump down river with her children. Unfortunately, she was saved, while her children died by herself. It will be inhumane if government uses death penalty for her.

However, other people believe that using capital punishment ensures safety for societies. In fact, we can see that the number of crimes is rising in some countries although many criminals are punished by death penalty and this kind of punishment cannot stop crimes.

In conclusion, I strongly believe that death penalty cannot bring safety for societies like people want. This punishment is not only an inhumane one, but also cannot prevent committing of criminals. Life time imprisonment is a better alternative for capital punishment.
thinhtvdhtm   
Oct 18, 2009
Writing Feedback / [TOEFL] All students should be required to study art and music in secondary school. [13]

i like the second paragraph,
about the third para, are u sure?
i read the topic sentence , i misunderstood that u are writing about benefits from art
i think when children learn at, they have to study, are u sure they are relax
some children who dont learn this subject, they still can use music to relax
thinhtvdhtm   
Oct 17, 2009
Writing Feedback / brain drain and solutions for this problem [5]

hi yin, firstly, many thanks t. you are the first person check for my essay very detail. thanks again.
in this writing, the second paragraph i give my opinion as well as support my view that i disagree with the view that rich countries are robbing poor countries of essential personnel because that is a natural phenomenon.

in the third paragraph, i answer the question whether or not rich countries should pay for poor countries for this movement.

the next, i propose my solution

i was not really comfortable with this essay, however, i think it is quite clearly, isnt it?

anyway, thank so much yin

yin, i have posted some essays in recent days, could u check them for me, thanks so much
have a nice day
thinhtvdhtm   
Oct 16, 2009
Writing Feedback / brain drain and solutions for this problem [5]

good morning Moderators, i have posted several my essays. however, i have not received any feedback from you. although there have some members' comments, i am not sure about their comments. personally, i think it is much better if i can get 1 or 2 comments from u, isnt it?

i am looking toward u
thinhtvdhtm   
Oct 16, 2009
Writing Feedback / brain drain and solutions for this problem [5]

i am preparing for ielts. however, my writing skill is very bad, could u help me point out my mistakes, thanks so much
More and more qualified people are moving from poor to rich countries to fill vacancies in specialist areas like engineering, computing and medicine. Some people believe that encouraging the movement of such people, rich countries are stealing from poor countries. Others feel that this is a part of the natural movement of workers around the world.

What are your views?
Do u think rich countries should pay poor countries for this movement.
Solutions to discourage this movement?


Recently, there has been a trend that people who are qualified are moving from poor nations to rich nation for more opportunities to develop and have a better life. Some people think that through this movement, rich countries are robbing poor countries of essential personnel like doctors, scientists and so on. Personally, I entirely disagree with those people.

To begin with, I believe that this movement is a natural phenomenon. People always desire to have more chance to develop themselves as well as acquire a better life; thus, qualified people moving to rich countries have opportunities to develop in their fields that they cannot do in poor countries. In developed countries, they have many advances about technology and they can make a good working environment for those people. For example, an information technology engineer cannot develop his self and create more technological products in poor countries due to lack of technology development. If he still works in poor country, he will have no chance to develop his ideas as well as use his talents. In contrast, when he moves into developed countries, he has more chance to apply their knowledge into practice as well as gain a much better life.

However, rich countries have many benefits from this movement; therefore, those countries should compensate to poor countries where qualified people are trained and educated. Poor countries often have to spend lots of money on educating and training those people, while they cannot receive any benefits from those people.

To discourage this movement, it will be more successful when there is co-operation between rich and poor countries. Poor countries should create a good working condition for their essential personnel as well as benefit for them such as large salaries, position in society and other benefits. In addition, developed countries should invest more money in poor countries; instead of moving to rich countries, they can work in their own countries with good working environment as that in rich countries.

In a word, this movement seems to be natural. If this phenomenon continues, the gap between rich and poor nations will be wider than now. Discouraging this movement is a good way for poor countries to reduce gap.
thinhtvdhtm   
Oct 15, 2009
Writing Feedback / giving more chance for women can cause some problem?what are your views? [3]

i am preparing for ielts, my writing is very bad, could u help me check this essay, thank so much

Task 2. Nowadays, there are more opportunities for women than there were in the past. Some people think this situation has caused more problems than it has solved. What are your views on this?

There is no doubt that in modern society, women have more chance to develop themselves, and there are also no any differences in the treatment between men and women. However, some people hold the opinion that this situation has resulted in more problems than it has solved. Personally, I partly disagree with those people; in this essay, I will give my reasons to support my views.

To begin with, giving more opportunities for women nowadays can not only help them develop their abilities, but also improve their contribution to society. In the past, most women had no chance to develop themselves, and they were treated unfairly. However, in most countries in the world now women have more opportunities like men have. Women and men are welcome to attend university to improve develop themselves. As a result, there are more and more female professionals in all fields such as research scientists, biography, geography, politics, which means that women have large contributions to society as well as the process develop of human beings. For example, a female professional in technology can create new products and apply those products to improve our living standard. A female politician can contribute to govern their country as well as make policies to develop their country.

However, some people consider that this situation can cause some problems; those people believe that when women have chance to gain their own achievement, they are attracted by success, famousness and forget their duty: look after their families. Some children are not well-behaved and those people blame this mistake on women. It is sure that motherhood is as important as fatherhood; thus, why looking family is duty only for women, is it unfair? I strongly believe that men should share this duty and take responsibility for looking children together.

To sum up, giving more chances for women helps them develop and acquire their achievements in the life as well as brings more benefit from women's achievements.
thinhtvdhtm   
Oct 15, 2009
Writing Feedback / Toefl essay:: Studying abroad, advantages and disadvantages. [8]

Furthermore, your costs most likely are higher and your income is less than in your country: are you sure? for example, a American go to a developing country for study? your statement is wrong, isnt it?

moreover, u dont say about advantages
thinhtvdhtm   
Oct 13, 2009
Writing Feedback / government should spend as much money as possible on developing technology [3]

please check for my grammar, sentence structure and ideas. i try to read several times but i cannot find out my mistakes, thanks so much for your comments

Some people think that governments should spend as much money as possible on developing or buying computer technology. Other people disagree and think that this money should be spend more on basis needs. Which opinion do you agree with? Use specific details and reasons to support your answer

Nowadays, we cannot deny that development in technological field called golden field has made our lives become better than ever before; therefore, some people consider that government should invest as much money as possible in developing and buying computer technology. Personally, I obviously disagree with those people for several reasons which will be analyzed in this essay.

To begin with, without a high qualified labor force, developing and buying computer technology seem to be in little use, so government should spend more money for improving education system. It is certain that a country cannot develop as well as create high technology if they do not educate and train about information technology engineering. In fact, some countries choose other way to develop technology: buying soft ware as well as equipment from developed countries. However, no matter how developed those products are, if labor force are not educated and trained well, they seem to be little useful.

Furthermore, humankind has confronted with many problems such as diseases, disasters which need to be solved as soon as possible. Government should spend more money to improve health systems in order to upgrade living standard. They should use money to train more health workers as well as supply medicines free for poor people, especially in mountainous and remote areas; there is lack of health workers, medicines and equipment for treatment. In addition, the changes in global climate result in more disaster occur; thus, government should spend more money to take some measures such as reproduce forests to prevent severe damage by disasters like floods, erosions and droughts. Moreover, pollution is an urgent problem needed to be solved. Government should invest money to improve public transportation service to reduce waste from vehicles, and for researching to find alternative like green energy.

In conclusion, although development technology help people have better lives, I believe that it will be better when government spends more money to meet basis needs in the life.
thinhtvdhtm   
Oct 13, 2009
Writing Feedback / cause of use the internet and solutions [3]

thanks mocixuan so much, your advices are very useful, thanks so much again, how do y think about this essay?
pl check for me, thanks so much
thinhtvdhtm   
Oct 13, 2009
Writing Feedback / face to face communication is better than others such as mail, phone... [6]

please check for my essay, i have read several times, but it seem difficult for me to point our my own mistakes, please help me, thanks so much

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Face-to-face communication is better than other types of communication, such as letters, email, or telephone calls. Use specific reasons and details to support your answer.

In modern society, with the rapid development of technology, people have more choices ways to communicate each other such as face to face, letters, emails, or telephones. However, I believe that face to face communication is much better than others, and in this essay, I will analyze some advantages of this kind of communication to support my opinion.

First of all, when people communicate each other in person, they can get responses immediately without misunderstanding. During conversation, people can not only hear responses from others, also see how they are feeling; people can guest what will take place next, how conversation is on, which is very important to have a successful talk. For example, in criminal inspection, face to face communication can know whether or not suspects are telling the truth through the way suspects answer questions, their facial, behaviors and eyes sight.

In addition, using face to face communication helps people express their feelings, ideas much better. Instead of using word only when people choose letters, emails or phone for communication, people can use eye contact, verbal language in order to show their opinions. Scientists show that more than seventy percent people use body or verbal language in communicating; thus, it very important for people use actions to express views.

Last but not least, conversations seem to be longer when people communicate in person. And of course, the more people talk together, the stronger and better relation they have. Take my friend for example. He is an insurance consultant, and he is very busy with his work; however, whenever his customers need advices, he always meets them in person never through phones, emails no matter how important customers they are. He believe that will make relationship with customers stronger and it is a key factor for success in his field.

To sum up, I believe that no matter how developed means of communication they are, face to face is still the most important and effective way for communication.
thinhtvdhtm   
Oct 13, 2009
Writing Feedback / cause of use the internet and solutions [3]

please check for my grammar, sentence structures, and so on. thanks so much

The widespread use of the internet has brought many problems. What do you think are the main problems associated with the use of the web? What solutions can you suggest?

We cannot deny that the internet is one of the most powerful means of communication in the history of humankind. The internet has made our planet become a better place for living; however, it also comes at a price. In this essay, I will analyze the main problems of using the web as well as propose my own solutions to those problems.

First of all, using the internet has some negative effects on young children. Instead of playing some games or sports activities outside in the past, young children now often spend most their free time on playing games on or suffering webs. Scientists show that using computers long time will have bad influence on people's eyes, backbones and make brains become strained. This can cause other problems such as obesity.

In addition, using the web influences in negative way on relationships among members in family. In the past, people used to spend their free time with their families; they had chance to chat and share emotion together, which enhances relationships among members. However, in modern society, people seem prefer spending spare time for suffering the internet to talking to others. Naturally, the more time people spend on the internet, the less time they have for talking to their friends, families, and some time they lose social communication.

Finally, some webs show information which is not accurate, exaggerated or suitable for users. Especially, when people read information about personal life of famous people, writers often overstate about them, even they write some things wrong. Some webs contain information, clips which are not appropriate for users, especially for children such sex or violent webs. When children read and watch them, they will be affected in bad ways.

To prevent those negative effects from using the internet, personally, I think that parents play main role in eliminating bad influences on their children. They should limit time using the internet as well as the number of webs for their children. Simultaneously, parents should give advices and directions for their children about use the internet, and encourage their children to participate in outdoor activities. Moreover, adults should spend their time for suffering the internet appropriately; they should spend time for communicating with friends, family.

In conclusion, although using
the internet brings some disadvantages, we can reduce those effects to minimum if we use web in a positive way.
thinhtvdhtm   
Oct 13, 2009
Writing Feedback / Toefl Independ Essay : where to learn a new language. [3]

Although there are some advantages to of learning a foreign language in its original country, I firmly believe that people who learn a foreign language in the country in which it is spoken have a deeper understanding of different language skills than those who learn the same languages in their own countries.
thinhtvdhtm   
Oct 13, 2009
Writing Feedback / TOEFL essay "modern technology" [7]

While the development of the modern technology
In the respects of study, some people believe the high developed technology has made the learning more quickly and people have the ability to achieve more information, while the other people disagree with this point. In my opinion, the modern technology does help students learn more information and learn it more quickly to some extent, but the disadvantages of the modern technology also can not be

i think u should notice the way use "the"
thinhtvdhtm   
Oct 12, 2009
Writing Feedback / using computer influence on young children [5]

pl check for my grammar, sentence structures, thanks so much

Using a computer every day can have more negative than positive effects on young children. Do you agree or disagree?

In modern society, computers are used in many different fields such as health, education, business, and they have also become more familiar to everyone. However, the question of whether or not there are more benefits than drawbacks for young children using a computer everyday is controversial. Personally, I obviously believe that these advantages outweigh disadvantages.

To begin with, using a computer everyday helps children can learn and upgrade their skill in using computers. When they are good using computer, they can get high marks in subjects involved using computers. They also can use some applications for education on their computer. Moreover, after finishing school, they go to working environment, they can meet requirements about this skill.

In addition, young children can learn more other things when they use computers everyday. Some of them often use computer for reading news, magazine on the internet, which help them improve reading skill as well as knowledge about the surrounding world. Some children say that they can travel all over the world from their armchairs with a computer.

However, some people consider that it is not good for children use computers everyday. They think that children often use computers for playing game, which has negative effects on children. We can deny that using computer for a long time, it is not good for eyes, backbones. Nevertheless, I think that when children play games, they can learn some things not only for entertainment. When they play game, they have to brainstorm to make plans, strategies in order to reach approaches, which help them become more creative. For me for an example, I loved racing car on my computer when I was young. When I played, I had to analyze which part of the race was good for me to run fast without accident. Also, I had to think how I combined with my partners to win others teams.

In conclusion, I strongly believe that using computer everyday brings more benefits than drawbacks for young children. The most important aspect is that what children use computers for and how they use them.
thinhtvdhtm   
Oct 12, 2009
Writing Feedback / Toefl essay---Technology has made the world a better place to live. [16]

chnology,in another word,the i nvention aiming at developing the society. Recently an accumulating number of people put their emphasis on the hot topic if technology makes our world a better place to live. A fair proportion of people contend that it is true that the development of technology affects us in the positive ways,such as p
thinhtvdhtm   
Oct 11, 2009
Writing Feedback / Sports professionals are genius like others professional & need to be paid well [4]

hi Zoe, thanks so much for your comment. i agree with your opinion that the sports industry generates billions of dollars each year. however, i do not agree that it is easy to become a good doctor. moreover, there are 6 kinds for intelligence.sports professionals are bodily intelligence.

anyway, i have just rewrite, pl check for me, thanks so much~!
thinhtvdhtm   
Oct 11, 2009
Writing Feedback / Sports professionals are genius like others professional & need to be paid well [4]

Test 2 cambridge 6

Successful sports professionals can earn a great deal more money than people in other important professions. Some people think this is fully justified while others think it is unfair.

Discuss both these views and give your own view,

In the modern society, sports has become more popular than ever before; as a result, there have been more and more young people decide to have a career in sports with desire to become a successful and famous professionals in sport and to be able to earn money. However, some people consider it unfair that sports professionals can earn much more money than others in others professions. In this essay, I will discuss both side of this issue.

On the on side, some people believe that professionals in some important fields deserve to get more money than in sports, and they have showed several reasons to approve their own opinions. For example, a technology professional can improve the life with their inventions and new high technological applications. A health professional can help their patients the way to achieve good health, get a better life, while sports professionals cannot do the same things.

On the other side, professionals in sport obviously deserve to have things what they are now able to have. First of all, sports professionals are people who are talents at sports, and the difference from others important professionals is kind of intelligence: a scientist who is intelligent at logic; a musician who is intelligent at music, and sports professional who is intelligent at sports. In addition, like other professionals, sports professionals also have to learn, practice to be able to become famous and earn lots of money. They also have to go to sports school, practice every day, experience many difficulties. In some sports, they even have to take high risk dangers. Moreover, their jobs also contribute to make the life better because sports is one of the most popular ways to relax for people.

In conclusion, I strongly believe that sports professionals are genius like others professional, and they deserve to be respected and be able to earn a great money.
thinhtvdhtm   
Oct 11, 2009
Writing Feedback / increase in sale reflect the power of advertisement not for real need [3]

i am preparing for ielts, pl check for me,and give me your comments, suggestions for my essay,thanks so much

Today, the high sales of popular customer goods reflect the power of advertisement and not the real needs for the society in which they are sold.

To what extent do you agree or disagree?


In the modern society, there is no doubt that commercial advertisement is the most powerful advertised tool for producers to bring their products to customers. Thus, some people hold an opinion that the increase in sales of some popular goods reflects the development of advertisement not for the rise in the real consumption demands. In this essay, I will analyze both sides of this issue.

On the one side, some people in the modern society decide to buy products not only for their own needs. In my own country, there are plenty of commercial advertisements on TV which are performed by famous people. When TV shows those advertisements, famous people's fans who are passional about their idols are more likely to buy that products without consideration about prices and quality of them. These people buy products not for their real demand; they buy that products because of their idols. In addition, there has also appeared a group of people who are rich, famous and want to show their wealthy to communities; these people buy products not to meet their needs. For example, when those people see an advertisement on television about expensive cars with appearance of a famous, rich family, and everyone in community know that it is a luxurious product. It is likely that they will buy this car for their desire having a happy, famous family like that even they have several other cars in garage. These people often do not care about their need, they are willing to pay a large mount of money for products as long as these products help them show their luxury.

On the other side, others people only buy products when these products can meet their real needs. Before making decision to buy any products, they often consider about utilization of products. Advertisement cannot change their consumption habit, and for them, commercial advertisement help them access more information about products such as prices, supplier. The crucial factor for deciding to buy products is value for usage.

In conclusion, I believe that commercial advertisements contribute to increase in sales; however, this selling rises reflect rises in real demands for products not only for the power of advertisement.
thinhtvdhtm   
Oct 11, 2009
Writing Feedback / in which ways, computer is a hindrance [3]

dear EF_Stephen, i was not comfortable with this essay. in this essay, i have to answer :
in which ways, computer is a hindrance. i supported in the second paragraph
what my opinion. i showed my view in the third paragraph. i know that it was not good, because i found it difficult.

could u give me more suggestions to improve my third paragraph?
thank so much

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