Undergraduate / Going away to school frightens me; Harvey Mudd Essay / One thing [6]

Due tomorrow so any help is appreciated. Wondering if this essay is too risky or skirts the question.
Prompt is what is one thing harvey mudd college won't know about me from my application.
Here it is:

Paper is a notoriously fickle medium of communication. Jules Verne could tell a tale of going into untold depths of the sea, and Ernest Hemingway could vividly elucidate on the Spanish countryside, yet I suppose you could never guess that they both had two spoonfuls of sugar in their morning cup of coffee. While a wonderful story can be told, quirks and nuances about the author are lost in translation; the author's voice can only express his personality as well as his writing is. So to further introduce myself, I am compelled to share a few qualities about me that may not be quite apparent on paper.

Going away to school frightens me. Moving nearly 139 miles away from home to attend college is not something you take lightly. It is a decision you make after hours of crying, yelling, and arguing - and then your parents finally decide to let you have a turn talking. But I suppose this is the essence of college: being thrust into the unknown - moving far, far away to return with stories of prosperity and success. Am I afraid? Perhaps so, but hesitant? Never. I face adversity head on with a certain doggedness that refuses to quit. If it takes leaving behind what I have known living in my small town for the past eighteen years to attend the school of my dreams, then I am ready to push forward into the unknown. As long as I have my family and friends behind me, coupled with my dreams within grasp, I would gladly let my parents drop me off in Claremont, California for a breathtaking and invaluable four years.

While unknown to many people, I am also in a deeply committed relationship with my world map. Resting upon the wall behind my computer it sits - watching the hours go by listening to the constant "clack" of the keyboard. I would say it knows me better than I do - the sheen fading to yellow across the whole map, the wearing and stains across all of Europe unabashedly showing just where my favorite places in the world are. I find comfort in the fact that the whole world can be compressed into five by seven foot map at the tips of my fingers. Its size is what I most enjoy about my map; it makes it seem like the world around me is manageable. A world like this is what I hold most dear in my heart. Nothing feels more like home to me than a small and intimate community where I could hope to know everyone's name.

And finally, my best friend in the whole world is single-variable calculus. It has been a summer since we last saw each other, but I can remember every moment in vivid detail. Fresh in my mind is the day when graphs could finally be drawn with the help of derivatives, or when area became a sum of infinitely thin rectangles. Never before had a set of concepts made so much sense, I could do nothing less than welcome this new chapter of mathematics into my life with open arms. Each day learning more about each other was an adventure, promising new chapters every week. And one does not simply forget a month's work on an integral project made of Rice Krispie treats. If spending 50 dollars on marshmallow, butter, and cereal to make a 3D parabolic shape is not an example of true friendship, then I cannot begin to imagine what is. And if we could become such quick friends, I can look forward in hope and excitement at the vast world of mathematics and science waiting to be met.

And to think, these are only small pieces that collectively make up the puzzle that represents me. These attributes may seem to be very disconnected, but truthfully they represent the eclectic nature of my personality. I really do feel excited to explore outside my own backyard, to test my limits, to achieve my dreams, and to grow in my love the sciences. I suppose that the one thing you will not know about me by my application is everything. I am not defined by numbers, grades, or words typed upon paper. I am a devoted, diverse, and intriguing individual that can really only be understood in person. You can read these words time and time again, but there are not enough words in this world that can accurately depict my love for knowledge, my quirks, my personality - truly, me. Thus, I suppose I will simply have to attend Harvey Mudd College. There is really no other way to know who I am than to spend four wonderful years getting to know each other.

Undergraduate / It is my dream/ Why Harvey Mudd ? [3]

Due in 3 days, any help would be appreciated! I'm just concerned it doesn't sound sincere enough or if it just needs some better description. I want to show that even though I haven't visited I know I absolutely want to attend Harvey Mudd College.

Being more than a just a "nerd"

Harvey Mudd College is no Caltech backup. It is my dream, and it has its own personality in my mind as a loveable and quirky school where a passion for math and science and appreciation for the humanities are welcomed in earnest. I will readily admit that I have not had the chance to visit - but that in no way impacts my interest or my love for Harvey Mudd College. I plan to visit soon, and I am confident that the way I feel now will only be intensified.

From every Harvey Mudd student I have had the chance to talk to, I can already tell that Harvey Mudd College would fit me like a glove. Where else would a Calculus project made out of a rice-krispie integral be appreciated? Nowhere, and that is why I am so drawn to Harvey Mudd. No other school I have seen has had such an amazing aura: where each student loves what they study and puts their heart into every effort. I long to be a part of such a close knit community where study groups are always exciting and unpredictable and calculus is not some geeky pursuit - it is a way of life. And just for good measure, Harvey Mudd requires a third of core classes to be humanities (because we all cannot sit in our dorms doing physics problems forever).

In addition to my need for a close knit community of students and professors alike, I am attracted to Mudd's heavy workload that emphasizes sciences, but also appreciates the arts. I have not and nor will I ever perform well with free time on my hands. I perform my best not only in small environments, but under pressure and with little time to spare. I have no explanation other than that filling my schedule with endless amounts of work and activities forces me to organize my time efficiently and ambitiously. In a way I am sure few people understand, the work I did between my two summer jobs was emotionally fulfilling and left me feeling like I was on top of the world - at the peak of my game. The work load Harvey Mudd College has to offer has been a very significant factor in my interest in applying, and I know I will be more than happy to devote hours to work, study, and the occasional unicycle ride to the Donut Man's legendary bakery.

With a campus close to home, and a student body that is enthusiastic and excited about studying, Harvey Mudd College is the perfect school in my eyes. It stands above all of the UC's and CSU's in California - with specialized attention and stronger engineering and computer science programs, Harvey Mudd College is one of a kind (much like each one of its students). As I apply to Mudd, I think of all my hard work, perseverance, and dreams culminating in one final moment, and come fall of 2013 I hope to be one of the few who can proudly call themselves a Mudder: more than a just a "nerd" - certainly a well rounded student, distinguished with excellence, among the most creative and brightest of their generation (with a penchant for pranking Caltech).