Writing Feedback / IELTS: who should responsible for elderly? [6]

[b]this is the topic question: Some people think that the government should offer financial support and care to the elderly, while others think that people should save money for their future life. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion?

Nowadays taking care of elders has become a discussional topic among the whole society. Some people believe that government should be responsible for looking after senior citizens and providing them monetary supports, while others think that individual save money for the future. My view is that these two ideas do not contradict with each other.

The government should pay attention to take care of elders because senior citizens have contributed enough to the society when they were young. The government should spare no effort to improve the living condition after elders retire. To be more specific, the government could establish free nursing home, by doing so, professional staff and equipped facilities could deal with physical condition of the grey generation. Furthermore, if the elderly stay with peers, it may reduce the possibility of being loneliness.

Conversely, individuals should be responsible for saving sufficient money for their future life. This is mainly because the government has limited budget for other purposes. It is unrealistic for the elderly to totally rely on the government's pension which can only cover basic living expense, and then live in an enjoyable life. If senior citizens wish to have a decent twilight years, they must prepare a plan at early stage.

Moreover, family should also be obligated to take care of the elderly. The elderly should be encouraged to live with family, by doing so, it can enhance family intimacy. As a result, they can get rid of loneliness by spending great time with their offspring.

In conclusion, the government should definitely provide financial aid to senior citizens. Meanwhile, individuals should also save up for their retirement. But more importantly, looking after the old is the responsibility of every member of our society.

Writing Feedback / IELTS: more and more pollution and waste are created everyday [7]

this is the question: more and more pollution and waste are created everyday. what problems does this cause to ordinary people?

the most two common consequences of increasing environmental pollution are healthy problem and life quality with regarding to ordinary peoples' life. For one thing, residents could suffer from water-related disease by drinking contaminated water. After drinking the polluted water, it may give rise to healthy problem such as diarrhea or fever. Due to the illness of pollution related, ordinary people are unable to perform their jobs and studies smoothly. For another, as pollution become increasingly serve,people may naturally tend to move in eco-friendly areas. in that case, it will have a financial burden and time waste on ordinary people, since they have to invest extra money on settling the new living environment and the time consume on addressing job related issue. As a result, putting a great deal of energy on migration makes individuals feel their life quality deprived.

PS: i repeated ordinary people many times, is there any other expression to that. also i used word'people' many times as well.

Writing Feedback / IELTS: more and more young people go oversea for further studies. Some people think it [4]

Question: more and more young people go oversea for further studies. Some people think it is a positive development while others think it brings negative effects. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

Nowadays, studying oversea has become a topic of frequent discussion among the whole society. Some people think that going abroad for education brings many benefits, while others hold different views. This essay will review the pros and cons of oversea study.

Enhancing language ability is the primary benefit for youngster to study oversea. This is mainly because they have to apply foreign language on their daily life such as during university and shopping. For example, university study in oversea often contains group assignment and presentation. After three years continuously practice foreign language, oversea student will surely improve their communication skills and writing skills. Apart from the language advantage, studying oversea also provides a better opportunity for future employment. Those oversea returnees have received advanced education in developed countries, which means they have better understanding deal with foreign events. In this case, they are both welcomed by local and international companies.

However, going oversea study alone can also be seen as a challenge. Being alone in an unfamiliar country sometimes can give rise to sense of loneliness. Without friends and family being around, those oversea students could feel helpless when they meet challenge from livelihood and academic performance. Consequently, they may start to lost interest in pursuing their oversea study. In addition, studying in most developed countries have certain financial burden on an ordinary family. If youngsters are not fully prepared and have not a clear plan about their future, the needs of advanced knowledge and valuable experience will not be achieved. In that case, they have waste their parents money and they are no different with those who study in their own countries.

To conclude, although oversea studying seems very attractive in terms of enhancing language and supporting future career, it is only true for those individuals who have a clear purpose about their trip. Otherwise it is only a waste of money and time.

Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 1: LINE GRAPH/ change in fish and other three types of meat consumption [7]

The line graph below shows the change in fish and other three types of meat consumption in a European country from 1979 to 2004.

It is clear that consumption in both beef and lamb enjoyed a gradual decrease trend throughout the period, while there was a considerable rise in chicken consumption, with the figure eventually overtaking beef and lamb consumption.

Between 1979 and 1989, lamb consumption dropped slowly from 150 to around 100 grams per person per week, while consumption of beef fluctuated, to nearly 200 grams per person per week. During the same period, the figure for chicken rose significantly from below 150 to just above 200 grams per person per week. However, fish consumption remained relatively stable, with around 50 grams per person per week.

By 2004, both beef and lamb consumption had plummeted massively, with figures reaching the bottom at around 100 and 50 grams per person per week respectively. By contrast, the amount of chicken consumed continued to rise quickly, reaching the top at about 250 grams per person per week in 2004. Interestingly, fish was still the least popular food, remaining at about 50 grams per person per week in 2004.

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Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 1: BAR CHARTS- Married and Divorced in the USA [8]

The charts below compare data about the number of people who were married and divorced in the USA over a period of 30 years, and the marital status of American adults in the year 1970 and year 2000.

It is clear that the gap between the number of married couples and divorced couples became closer throughout the period. Also, the rate for people who never married and divorced had increased by 2000, while the rate of married people and widowed people had experienced a decline by 2000.

The year 1970 had the highest gap between the number of married couples and divorced couples, with 2.5 million and 1 million respectively. From this time onwards, the gap stared to reduce. In 2000, the figure for marriages hit to the bottom point at 1 million, while the number of divorces remained unchanged at 1 million.

By 2000, the rate for never married adults and divorced adults had increased, from approximately 12 percent to 20 percent and nearly 2 percent to almost 7 percent respectively. The rate for divorce more than tripled in 2000. However, the rate for married couples and widowed people declined, to just under 60 percent and approximately 5 percent respectively in 2000.

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Writing Feedback / Ielts Task 2:Our cities are noisier than ever before. Why is this so, and what can be done [4]

Our cities are noisier than ever before. Why is this so, and what can be done about it?
You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.
Write at least 250 words.
Nowadays, it is believed that people live in a noisier environment than in the past. My view is that industrialization and pursuit of night life-style are the main causes. Also, it is the responsibility of both government and enterprise to clear up the problem.

To begin with, due to the fast development of industrialization, a series of infrastructures have been build in order to satisfy resident's demand. In order to complete the projects before deadline, construction companies would prefer to choose continuously operation and apply heavy machines during day and night. Consequently, constantly loud sounds make people believe that their living environment has been damaged. Apart from the construction, chasing night lifestyle is another contribution. Working pressure and interpersonal relationship led individuals to join the night activities such as shopping and clubbing, to release the pressure. Therefore, shop owners would try to extend trade hours to attract more customers. This is why streets are full of people even in the late night.

In terms of solving the problems, government can take the primary role by introducing law and regulation. For example, government could regulate the trade hours for shops and reduce the accessibility of night public transport thereby controlling people stay night outside. Furthermore, construction companies should also take corporate responsibilities by limiting heavy machines operation during the night, and massive fine should be applied if companies break the rules.

To conclude, cities development and chasing night lifestyle are mainly responsible for noise in urban areas. But joint effort by government and enterprise could return a relatively peace environment to community.

Writing Feedback / IELTS;Some celebrities misguide young people& some guide them in right direction [5]

Nowadays celebrities are more famous for their glamour and wealth than for their achievements, and this sets a bad example to young people.
To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people think that celebrities are known for their glamorous lifestyle rather than the work they do. While I agree this will bring negative impacts on the younger generation, this is not necessarily the case for those celebrities who are ambitious in their jobs.

It is true that some celebrities tend to show off their images in front of the public. For example, some movie starts enjoy wearing luxury brand clothes and showing their expensive life style in front of the media, thereby gaining the public attention. If they continue to behave in such a way, it will create a misleading image to young people who may think that extraordinary life can be achieved without hard work. Consequently, the attention of young people may become focused on chasing the dream of celebrity status. This is detrimental to study and work ethics and habits.

Nevertheless, I believe that other celebrities do set up role models to young people because of their visible accomplishments. Firstly, celebrities such as sports player whose performance and professional skills can be directly seen by their fans. This means that people understand that the great deal of efforts on training is directly linked to their results. Therefore, this kind of self-made celebrity can inspire children to develop their talents through application and perseverance. Secondly, other celebrities such as musician also have achieved great success in their career. Take Michael Jackson as an example, his works are widely spread around the world, and have been extremely welcomed by the younger generation. His songs spread the idea that people should care about each other, which suggests to young people how to become a good member of society.

In summary, although some celebrities misguide young people by showing their external wealth and appearance, other celebrities do lead young people in the right direction.