Writing Feedback / Is a perfect job the main factor of happiness? IELTS TASK 2 [2]

Some people say that in order to be happy you must have a job you love doing. Others say that other factors are more important.

Do you think that people can only be happy if they have a job they really enjoy?

It is assumed that doing an occupation which is related to personal passion is the best course to obtain happiness in life while some individuals think that there are many more reasons which lead to human pleasures. In my opinion, even though carrying out a comfortable work is truly pleasant, I strongly believe that gaining blissfulness is not only due to doing what we love, but basically it depends on respective personal.

There is no doubt that procuring an enjoyable job can make people happy. It is because carrying out a job which is linear with self-hobby is suchlike double pleasures. Take the photographers as an example, basically most them absolutely has a passion on taking a picture and when they have a job as a photographer, they can earn salary as well. As a result, their quality of life is more and more advance. It cannot be circumvented that having a comforting work is a real happiness in life.

Nevertheless, having an enjoyable job is not the only reason that can lead to blissfulness, since different person generally has a different contentment. Firstly, obtaining enough love and care from close relatives are the immensely pleasant and unmatched for lots of individuals, as to be part and parcel, love and care are support for every single person for still life. In addition, several people also have a thought that happiness is when they get a chance to go on vacation. Virtually, holiday is the best moment to have fun, unscrew the burden and enjoy the life as well. There are, therefore, so many things that can make person happy.

The aforementioned evidence reveals that in spite of having an enjoyable work can make people be joyful, I presume that every single person can be happy in many ways which depends on their perspective and desire.

Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 2 : Human Cannot Live Without Internet - cyber addiction and cyber-crime danger [2]

It is true that internet has been the incredible innovation over recent decades. Most individuals have a thought that the net has led to substantial change in people's lives in many ways. While I strongly believe that human lives would be different without the net, drawbacks such as cyber addictive and cyber-crime should be taken into account.

There is no doubt that human lives become easier thanks to the internet. The expanding of the online network is a positive development since everyone can easily access to the abundance information. A good example of this is like in Indonesia, almost all entrepreneurs such as from batik fabric enterprise utilize cyber site to promote and advertise their product worldwide. Consequently, the people over the world can discern an Indonesian batik product and it also reduces the advertisement costs. Furthermore, the references and helps which are provided on the net are really useful for many professions such as students for finishing their assignment. All in all, Internet has becomes an unavoidable technology that unmatched for most people in modern era.

On the other hand, it must be admitted that the spread of the net brings drawback for human life as well. A recent study reveals that virtually all netizen users become more and more addict and spend time for hours by surfing on the web. As a result, most of netizen become unhealthy as has affected by radiation of the computer or smartphone that they utilize. Moreover, in many cases, many individuals tend to socialize on the virtual world rather than their real world.

To sum up, Internet indeed has become an inevitable for human life at these days and ages. Personally, I extremely agree that human life will be complicated and totally different without the online network. However, it is also crucial that the net bestows negative effect in human civilization. Therefore, every single person should utilize internet wisely.

Writing Feedback / 'tiger and the rhino' - IELTS TASK 2: THREAT OF WILDLIFE HABITAT [2]

WRITING TASK 2
Animal habitats have been destroyed, and some animal species (e.g. the tiger and the rhino) have become endangered.
Why does this happen?
What can be done to protect endangered animals?

It is true that these days and ages, wild animals' existence become more and more threatened. Even several creatures have stated near extinction such as Orang-utan and Ranggong Bird in Borneo. In my opinion, the improvement of human demography is one of the predominant factors which have led to decrease of the animal's natural habitat. However, I do believe that divesting the animals in their natural habitat and collaboration between governments and local will be the best ways to protect fauna from extinction.

For centuries, it cannot be circumvented that human civilization has changed world in many ways, belonging to threaten the wildlife's existence. Locals continuously cut down forests for residence purposes and many companies perpetrate deforestation illegally instead, with converting forests to palm-oil plantations. For instance, as per Indonesian Ministry of Environment and Forestry records that at least 1,1 billion hectares or 2% of Indonesia's forests decline dramatically in each year. Consequently, lots of species such as Orang-utans and Ranggong Bird are at an alarming rate due to the reason that their natural habitats have sabotaged.

Nevertheless, there are potential ways to solve these problems or preserve endangered animals from extinction. Firstly, the government needs to cooperate with international organizations such as the United Nations to establish a preservation programs toward scarce animals and prosecute the perpetrators-illegal logger and - as well. Also, individuals can take a part to protect their natural balance by ceasing to hunt the endangered species. In addition, every people should consider the impact on the wildlife habitat, when they want to build a residence. Finally, Wildlife must have places to find food, shelter and raise their young to still survive. Endangered species habitat should be protected and these impacts minimized.

In conclusion, human activities consciously have triggered defacement of fauna habitat. However, if all elements can take part in protecting the animals' natural life, I strongly believe that entire communities of animals will be everlasting.

Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 1 : MUSEUMS VISITORS IN LONDON (measured in thousands) [3]

The line chart figures the level of guests in three different museums in London during June to September 2-13 and is measured in thousands. Overall, the number of people going to British and Science Museum increased gradually, while visitors from Natural History showed the reverse. In any case, British Museum was the most popular attractions among all museums.

To begin, the level of guest in British Museum stood at 600,000 in June 2013 and reached a peak of approximately 750,000 in July. However, in August 2013, there was a dramatic decline to 500 thousands. Through September witnessed a significant improvement in the number of visitors.

Moving to the other museums, the number of people who visited Science and Natural History Museum started at just over 500 thousands and 400 thousands respectively. Subsequently, there was a gradual decrease in the rate of visitors in the following two months. However, August experienced a steady rise to just over 400,000 in the number of guests

• 
  
  

Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 1 : THE INTERNATIONAL SALE of FUEL-ELECTRICITY CONVEYANCE [2]

A breakdown of the level of the international sale of fuel-electricity transportation in different regions around the world during 2006 to 2009, a 3-year period is illustrated in a bar chart. At the firs glance it is obvious that the selling count in the end of period improved as many as twice from the start of year. In any case, whilst there was a fluctuation in products' trade rate in United States, the level of hybrid transport trade in Japan and the other countries increase considerably during the time frame.

To begin, in 2006, the trade rate of hybrid transport in Japan stood at over 50 thousands; likewise, the other regions, exclude US, sold approximately 50 thousands fuel-electricity conveyance. Interestingly, the product commerce in Japan increased gradually until 2008, with in 2009 the rate reaching a high of over three fold from the previous year, while 2006 until 2009 in other areas witnessed a slight improvement in the trading rate of hybrid conveyance.

Turning to the sale rate of fuel-electricity conveyance in United States, 2007 experienced a peak of 350 thousands and it was the highest commerce rate during the period. Although there was a consider fall in 2008, the product sale increased again by approximately 10,000 in the following year.

• 
  
  

Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 2 : DISCOVERERS ARE AS CRUCIAL TO COMMUNITY AS PARA MEDICS [NEW]

Inventors are not as important to society as doctors.
To what extent do you agree whit this statement?

It is assumed that doctors have a bigger influence to locals rather than investors. In my opinion, even though there is no doubt that doctors have an essential role in society especially in salvaging locals' lives from many diseases, I strongly believe that discoverers basically bring more considerable changes in many course to the human civilizations.

For centuries, public's health and sanitation have become more and more better thanks to the para medics mainly the doctors. Many people even assume that the doctors as a hero, since they have cured and saved humans lives from lots of maladies. For instance, in many hinterlands or villages in Indonesia, a doctor's existence is suchlike a God hand who can give an aid sincerely when the locals are getting sick. Lots of inhabitants recover from their illness due to the doctors' aid. As a result, the citizens are more and more need the presence of para medicines among their environment.

Nevertheless, it cannot be denied that most of doctors' successful and ease of human lives in general are essentially helped by many new inventions of technologies and sciences because of the discoverers. Since centuries, there have been so many inventions which are used to improve the quality of humans' life. The lamp discovery by Thomas Alfa Edison is just the plain sample invention which has changed the human civilization becoming brighter. Furthermore, in this present, the spread of advanced technologies have made human activity becoming easier. For instance, the internet as the most significant invention in this modern era provides the abundance of references and information which are really crucial in knowledge expansion. Finally, all of these unmatched benefits can human enjoy due to the inventors' merit.

In conclusion, although para medics like the doctors have a vital role in a community, I am extremely disagree of the statement that said that discoverers role are not as essential as the doctors in society, since there have been many evidences that make human life become better thanks to the inventors' discoveries.

Writing Feedback / IMMIGRANT'S PROBLEM WHEN LIVING ABROAD [2]

A breakdown of the level of three different predominant problems which are witnessed by individuals who decided to live overseas and measured in percentage is provided in a bar chart. At first glance it is obvious that, looking school for children is the lowest problem for the new settlers. In any case, finance is the big matter for most young people, while for immigrants aged 35 or over experience sanitary as the greatest obstacle.

With regard to children education, individuals' age between 35-54 face the obstacle to bring their children to school at approximately 18%, while for the youngest and the oldest categories experience this trouble at 6% and 2% respectively.

Turning to finance problem, at almost 34% people aged between 18 and 34 assert this complication when reside in another country, while for older migrants who aged 35 to 54 experience by 2% compared with the youngest age category. However, sorting out funds is not the main problem for the oldest people who find monetary problem fewer than 30%. On the other hand, the percentage of healthcare problem people aged 35 to 54 and over 54 reach 36% and 37% consecutively, while for the youngest age group is just under 35%.

• 
  
  

Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 2: IS IT DIFFICULT TO BE HEALTH? [2]

SOME PEOPLE SAY THAT IN THE MODERN WORLD IT IS VERY DIFFICULT FOR PEOPLE TO HAVE A HEALTHY LIFESTYLE. OTHERS, HOWEVER, SAY THAT IT IS EASY FOR PEOPLE TO BE HEALTHY AND FIT IF THEY WANT TO BE

DISCUSS BOTH THESE VIEWS AND GIVE YOUR OWN OPINION.

It is generally assumed that in this sophisticated era, it is quite arduous to keep hale and healthy due to many factors. However some others argue that basically obtaining a healthy lifestyle is not difficult if there is a desire. In my opinion, every single person has to add healthy habit in their routine, although they are lack of time to do it.

In this day and age, a great deal of time due to busy on duty has made the risky lifestyles becoming more and more popular among the citizens. In my opinion, this problem is the common obstacle for several people who work in a mega city. For instance, many full-time workers in a big city such as in Jakarta have to work in office from early morning to virtually evening and do not have much leisure time to do healthy life routine such as sport. In addition, another factor that is possible to promote an unhealthy lifestyle is the high frequency in consuming junk food which is regarded resistant to cause many diseases. This phenomenon happens as well to the citizen of the city mentioned earlier. The spread of junk food shops in that area has tempted the busy communities to obtain instant meals.

On the other hand, every single human is actually possible to gain a healthy manner of life. I strongly believe that the willingness is the predominant key to obtain this perfect lifestyle. Take a sample for busy worker, they can use bicycle to go to work. Beside it is a simple way to keep fit, they actually have taken a part to reduce the traffic congestion and climate change. And with regard to consume healthy food, they can look for an organic food in shop or as adequate as possible they cook for themselves.

To conclude, in spite of some factors in the modern world counteracting people to have a healthy life manner, I extremely believe a strong willingness to do an effort like the examples I provided previously can evade that assumption.

Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 2 : THE MEDIA AND THE MAIN REPORTS [2]

THE MEDIA PAY TO MUCH ATTENTION TO THE LIVES AND RELATIONSHIP OF CELEBRITIES SUCH AS ACTORS, SINGERS OR FOOTBALLERS. THEY SHOULD SPEND MORE TIME REPORTING THE LIVES OF ORDINARY PEOPLE INSTEAD.

It is true that at these days and ages, majority of the mass media tend to be more attracted exposing the personal life of popular people such as celebrities and sport players as the headline new. Although the information regarding famous ones are quite interesting to be discuss by citizens, I unanimously agree that virtually press media should pay more attention to the phenomenon in local's lives.

As a matter of fact, the source information about the live of outstanding individuals is the inevitable news, since a wide range of inhabitants assume it as a part of world entertainment. For instance, in Indonesia virtually entire TV stations broadcast gossips program every day. And it is still maintained due to have attracted the attention from many viewers. Hence, the reporting as for fame person actually becomes one of the local's entertainments.

However, the news release with regard to the occurrences in local environments should be more encouraged, because to part and parcel, media have a vital role to be the connector or the informant between citizens lives and government activities. For instance, in many regions worldwide, Media have been representative of locals' voices and critics which extended to the government for years. On the other hand, the government can convey the extent of their performance thanks to media.

To conclude, even though news about familiar ones is quite needed as the consolation for many people, I extremely believe that correspondent properly centralize reporting on the occasion in locals' and government's environment.

Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 1 : THE ESSENTIAL SKILL IN JOB AS PER SURVEY [4]

The table chart compares the proportion of communication competencies which are crucial in occupation as per the opinion of respondents on surveys in 1997 and 2007. Overall, it can be analyzed that the sequences of skills from the most important to the lowest in both of survey in 1997 and 2006 remained unchanged. In any case, dealing with people was the most important skills in a job, while conducting presentation was assumed as an unessential expertise in a profession.

To begin, the survey in 1997 reveals that being faced with other people, listening to colleagues, advising for a client, knowing of products and training people were the top five crucial skills which the percentage reached of 60, 38, 36, 35 and 25 percent consecutively. Interestingly, these competencies, based on the survey in 2006, were still in the top five though there was an alteration formation between caring for costumers and knowing of a particular product.

On the other hand, the five remaining skills such as analyzing work together with others, selling a product, persuading others, planning the activities of others, and making a presentation were valued by respondent as the five lowest necessities in job which based on the current study showed that the rates realized at fewer than 26%, while in the oldest survey gained at just under 24%.

• 
  
  

Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 2 : Who Should Take Responsibility on Children Unhealthy Lifestyle? [3]

MANY CHILDREN THESE DAYS HAVE UNHEALTHY LIFESTYLE. BOTH SCHOOLS AND PARENTS ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR SOLVING THIS PROBLEM.
TO WHAT EXTEND DO YOU AGREE WITH THIS STATEMENT?
It is true that at this time and ages most adolescents have a sedentary lifestyle particularly regard to consuming risky dishes and drinks. Although I agree that their closest environments such as family and school have a big responsibility to reduce this harmful manner of life, I strongly believe that the government should be involved and be the stakeholder for solving this problem.

At the present time, the sophisticated technology has changed human life in many ways. One of the obvious facts is that most individuals have the instant lifestyle, belong to consume unhealthy cuisines and beverages. In particular, many children have a bad habit in consuming sorts of ready-made meals. As a result, most of them are vulnerable to gain ailments and it is arduous to do their daily activities, such as study and play with their peers.

Basically, this problem is the responsibility of either parents or schools, since they have a vital role to preserve the healthcare of their generations; particularly their mother and father at home have a privilege controlling their children's meal, while the school side must ensure the hygiene of dishes in the canteen. However, the result will not be maximal unless the government takes a part to establish a right policy for reducing this dangerous manner of life. For instance, the Health ministry and the local government in Indonesia have encouraged the license of foods, drinks and cosmetics distribution by built a committee who watch out all of the novel products. Hence, the citizens can consider consuming the licensed goods only.

In conclusion, I strongly believe that to compress the unhealthy lifestyle of the children, parents and schools are the main factors to tackle this phenomenon. However, in my view, if there is not encouragement of the government to relieve this harmful habit then the result will not reach our expectation. The government, parent, and the school must work together to save the young generations.

Writing Feedback / The level of graduates from 2001 to 2007 who are recruited as regular educators in Ontario; IELTS 1 [2]

The graph provides information about the level of graduates from 2001 to 2007 who are recruited as regular educators of English and French subjects in Ontario at the same year once graduated and is measured in percentage. Overall, it is evident that the percentages of first-year English teachers decreased significantly over the time frame, while the French-language tutors' rate increased considerably.

To begin, the level of French-language teachers, graduates 2001 stood at 70% in the starting period, likewise, the teachers of English subject was recruited by approximately 3% compared with the French tutor at the same year. However, both of categories fell sharply in the following year at just under 60%. Interestingly, in 2003 experienced a significant improvement of French-language teacher's acceptance, while the employment's rate of educators in French lesson plunged to 40%.

During the period of 2003 to 2005, the percentage of both categories simultaneously grew. However, until the end of the period, while the recruitment rate of English lesson's tutors jumped sharply at fewer than 30%, there was a considerable improvement in the level of French-language educators at approximately 73%, although there was a gradual drop in the previous year.

• 
  
  

Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 2 : EMPLOYEE OR EMPLOYER - being an owner of some personal business is worth to consider [2]

SOME PEOPLE DECIDE TO START THEIR OWN BUSINESS INSTEAD OF WORKING FOR A COMPANY OR ORGANISATION.
DO THE ADVANTAGES FOR PEOPLE WORKING FOR THEIR OWN BUSINESS OUTWEIGH THE DISADVANTAGES?

At these days, it is generally considered by lots of individuals to be an entrepreneur rather than being an employee for another enterprise. In spite of drawbacks such as the business is possible to be unsuccessful or even can be bankrupt, I believe that being the owner of our personal business and gain income from it are merits that should be taken into account.

Several people sometimes argue that being an employee is a safety way to obtain a stable salary due to the reason that workers receive a monthly salary from his superiors regularly. A further disadvantage is possible to be bankrupt, this notion is sometimes haunting many people to begin their own enterprise. For illustrate, when a company is bankrupt, the employer or manager is the most losses, while the worker or employee on this company can easily look for another company

Indeed, starting up an own business is a quite complicated evidenced with the issues that I have mentioned previously. However, to be part and parcel being a boss on personal business is an inevitable pleasure. Although someone earns much money by working for another enterprise, actually they are still a peasant. On the other hand, if somebody establish his own business, by far he is a boss. Moreover, you would be extremely happy earning income from your personal enterprise. Furthermore, you can control and manage your time work personally.

To sum up, even though some obstacles would be demerits in starting up personal business, earn income and control own expertise personally are the great benefits that should be taken into account.

Writing Feedback / THE WIND TURBINE - the structure and process of generating electricity - IELTS TASK 1 [2]

The given diagrams illustrate the structure and process of generating electricity from the wind power as well as the possible position to place the machine. At first glance, it can be seen that a turbine structured by some essential equipment like steel tower, generator, blades and wind sensor which is connected to the computer. In any case, this machine is possibly installed in three different spots in order to produce electricity.

In the first stage of the process, wind's direction is firstly detected by wind sensor of the machine. By the time, this tool measures the speed of the wind as well. Next, the information regarding course and speed of the wind are analyzed by the computer and then the computer will adjust the rotation of blades which made from fiberglass or wood materials. When the winds pass through the propeller, it will create an air pressure that can rotate the turbine propeller. Ultimately, the rotation of blades can produce electricity up to 1,5 megawatts thanks to the generator.

Furthermore, the whole structures are installed in various spots, such as around locals residential in a smaller size of the turbine and just generating about 100 kilowatts. Meanwhile, lots of the turbines are possibly placed in the sea in order to reduce the harmful effect on the coast. On the other hand, the establishment of the turbine in the mountain is possible to obtain optimum wind energy and also generate a plenty of electricity.

• 
  
  

Writing Feedback / The given diagram illustrates the ins and outs of air circulation in a house - prodigality of energy [4]

The given diagram illustrates the ins and outs of air circulation in a house and causing the extravagance of energy because of heat losses. Overall, the standing out information from the picture is that the air goes into a house through downstairs and upstairs while the warm atmosphere is leaked by way of the ceiling in the building.

To begin, the air leaks into the house through several medium which is installed either on the upper floor or basement of the construction. The majority of the air go through the windows and door. Besides, outdoor faucet and crawl space in the basement are contributed to dispense the fresh atmosphere into the house. Moreover, the hot airs are also replaced by the new atmosphere thanks to the household like kitchen fan and dryer vent.

On the other hand, the warm air in the building is leaked through few channel on the ceiling such as recessed light and attic hatch, while bathroom fan and plumbing stack vent are the mediums for the warm air losing out of the house.

• 
  
  

Writing Feedback / 'level of blissfulness' - IELTS TASK 1 : HAPPINESS RATING CHARTS [3]

The first bar chart provides information about the blissfulness level of individuals who have married and still single, categorized by age group, whereas a breakdown of the percentage of mated couples' happiness based on the number of children is illustrated in another bar chart. Overall married couples have a higher happiness rating rather than the single ones. In any cases, the bliss level of married individuals who have either children or no children tends to be similar.

To begin, happiness rating in whole age groups of mated people are virtually equal. However, people aged 18 to 29 are recorded as the highest level of blissfulness at 45%, while married people in the age 50-64 age group saw lower by 5% compared to the youngest age group. On the other hand, the bliss rate of unmarried individuals under 64 years of age is just over 20, whilst the single people aged above 64 years reach 34% of happiness rate.

Moving to a more detailed analysis of mated couples' happiness, people who have children under 18 years seem happier than other groups, with reaching 44%. Meanwhile, individuals who have children aged 18 years or above experience as the lowest happiness rating at 41%.

• 
  
  

Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 2 : THE INFLUENCE OF SOPHISTICATED MEDIA on people in a relationship [3]

The use of electronic media has a negative effect on the personal relationship between people.
To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is generally assumed that utilizing of sophisticated media such as the net and mobile phone bring a detrimental effect on the personal interaction between individuals. In my view, although in several cases the use of electronic devices breaks a relationship, I strongly believe that it totally depends on the user. If advanced technology is used properly so it can make the relation being more harmony.

These ages, electronic gadget becomes an unavoidable belonging for virtually every single person. However, this equipment sometimes leads to a problem, especially debate between couple partner due to each of them busy on their personal device. Most of the couple tend to spend more time to focus on their own gadget and neglect their partner. As a result, they are a lack of a real personal communication.

Nevertheless, I extremely believe that to be part and parcel, technology devices do really aid a human in many ways, including establishing a perfect relationship. It is because sophisticated technologies like the net and smartphone are truly useful to make the distance being meaningless. To illustrate, a great number of people can keep in touch with their partner thanks to electronic devices. Moreover, the use of gadget also gives a great chance for entire individuals to perpetuate their every single moment in their togetherness by the phone camera and shared on their social media. Hence, they can remember the precious moment whenever they are.

To conclude, the advanced media can possibly trigger a dire effect on people in a relationship if it is used inappropriately. However, I extremely believe that electronic device makes the relationship between individuals if they utilize it wisely.

Writing Feedback / PROPORTION OF FOSSIL FUELS CONSUMPTION IN THE US AND THE UK [2]

A breakdown of the proportion of petrol consumption as per three different earning income among citizens in the UK and the US is illustrated in a line chart. At first glance, it is obvious that in the United States, the poor consume much fuel than middle and rich ones, while in the UK, people who have low incomes spend less petrol than other categories.

To begin, low-income people in the United Kingdom consume petrol at approximately 0,5 to 2,7 percent of usage. In contrary, the poor in the US spend petrol with reaching a high of 5,2%. Meanwhile, middle-income citizens in both countries consume fossil fuel around 4%-5% (the US) and 2,7%-4% (the UK).

Furthermore, the level consumption of petrol fuel among wealthy people in both developed countries are virtually same where the rich people in the UK utilize much petrol oil at around 3-4 percent rather than wealthy people in the US at just around 2% to 4%.

• 
  
  

Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 2 : CAN OUTFIT APPEARANCE SHOWS SOMEONE'S CHARACTER? [3]

Some people say that the clothes people wear are the most important indication of what they are like. Others, however, say that people should not be judged by the clothes they wear.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
It is true that clothes become an inevitable accessory in human beings' lives. Nowadays, a great number of people assume that these garments can delineate who an individual is, while others believe that there are no justifications for this. This essay will discuss both points of view.

For decades, apparel has become a primary need for every single person which protects them from the detrimental effect of various weather conditions. Interestingly, the style of dresses is constantly changing in each age and most of the people have a tendency following the new fashion trends in order to still look up to date. Moreover, lots of outstanding people wear the certain style and the current dress to impress their fans and express themselves. As a result, fashion occasionally becomes a benchmark in society to describe someone's personality.

Nevertheless, some people believe that it is quite hard to value someone character based on their outward appearance since the different person has a different dress style. Generally, the garment which individuals used depends on their occupation. For instance, a business woman dresses clothes neat suit up in order to seem polite when meeting with colleagues, while a farmer always wears a simple suit like t-shirt because this type of fabric is easier to absorb sweat. Therefore, the cloth is totally worn for such purposes and we cannot judge people's character by the clothes they wear.

In conclusion, I would argue that garment basically cannot be an indicator to value somebody's personality, due to the reason that the cloth is just outfit appearance that can be manipulated anytime, while someone's character could not be changed. Finally, while there are some who may wish to judge people by what they wear, the reality is that nobody can distinguish the character of a person simply by the clothes they wear.

Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 1 : THE NUMBER OF PASSENGER IN THREE DIFFERENT INTERNATIONAL AIRPORTS [2]

The given bar chart illustrates the number of passenger in three different international airports during five years, from 1995 to 2000 and is measured in millions of people per year. At first glance, it is obvious that the total of the traveler increased considerably in both Laguardia and Newark air terminals until the end of the period, while there was a fluctuation of visitors' rate in John F. Kennedy Airport. In any case, LaGuardia experienced the highest rate of the visitor in virtually each year.

Moving to a more detailed analysis, visitor numbers who arrived at Newark Airport began approximately 35 thousand while the total of guest in Laguardia Airport reaches over twice as many as Newark. Subsequently, 1995 to 1998 experienced a gradual improvement in the total of holiday maker in both of international airports. However, while the number of travelers in Laguardia grew steadily in following two years and reaching a high of nearly 70 thousand of people in 2000, the level of the visitor in Newark international airport was leveling off at 42 thousand of the passenger for the remainder of the period.

With regard to the passenger rate at J. F. Kennedy airport, the total of passenger stood at just under 30 thousand in 1995 and increased steadily over the following two years, with the rate reaching a peak of 45,000 passengers. However, it suddenly fell to approximately 32 thousand of guest in 1999. Finally, the rate then increased again in 2000 by 10,000 visitors compared to previous year.

• 
  
  

Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 2 : MONITORING SYSTEM THROUGH ADVANCED TECHNOLOGY [2]

Nowadays technology is increasingly being used to monitor what people are saying and doing (for example, through cell phone tracking and security cameras). In many cases, the people being monitored are unaware that this is happening.

Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

These days and ages, it is true that sophisticated technology is becoming an integral part of human being lives due to its expediency. In particular, some of the technology equipment like CCTV camera or cell phone are used to keep track of people's activities or conversation. In general, most of the people occasionally do not realize if they are being monitored. I firmly believe that this development is beneficial to reduce the criminal cases like shoplifting or organized crime and be the authentic evidence in a certain incident. However, increase in case of illegal wiretapping is a drawback that should be taken into account.

It is inevitable that human life becomes getting easier thanks to technology. A great number of people or companies utilize several advanced technologies like CCTV camera of particular interest. Generally, it is put in the house, office or shop for security reason. Take the stores in a shopping center as an example, the manager or the owner of those shops fit up the CCTV camera in order to record the whole activities in the shops include the shoplifting incident. The thief who is not aware of surveillance camera will be easily caught by the security. Besides, the recorded videos or conversation in a certain crime can be an authentic evidence to ensnare the perpetrator to confess. Therefore, these advanced technologies are totally useful and bring so many benefits.

Nevertheless, every single person or company has to consider to have a strong legal basis for monitoring certain individual due to the reason that each person has the privacy right of their own as long as it does not harm others. The technology possibly leads the drawbacks because it can be also used to steal the personal or secret information. For instance, in 2009, the Indonesian president and several state officials in Indonesia had experienced an illegal wiretapping through the telephone by the Australian government since 2007. This incident is certainly very detrimental to Indonesia because their privacy information had been stolen.

To conclude, despite the fact that the easy leaking of information because of modern technology is a demerit that should be taken into account, I believe that the development of this technology brings more advantages in human life as long as it does not harm other people.

Writing Feedback / At what age should kids begin their formal education: at four years old or 7 years old instead? [2]

In some countries it is thought advisable that children begin formal education at four years old, while in others they do not have to start school until they are seven or eight.

How far do you agree with either of these views?

It is generally assumed in several countries that the parents necessarily enroll their children in a primary school at the early age. In contrary, others argue that the children ideally begin their formal education at least 7 years old. Personally, it can be justified to provide basic skills for children in early age, but the materials which are introduced to the children should be adjusted to their capacity.

It is true that education is one of the essential necessary in human being life and generally has introduced since a young age. Most parents consider bringing their children to formal school in early age, occasionally 4 years old. This consideration is generally based on argument that at a younger age, children are faster to comprehend something new. Moreover, Lots of studies have revealed that the first five years is the golden age of children's intelligence development. One study says that at the age of 4 years old children's intelligence capacity has reached 50%. In many cases, children who have introduced with the basic materials like recognizing letters and numbers have a greater ability than their peers who have not been introduced to the subject since childhood.

Nevertheless, all parents should take into account that basically there are several development stages on children's brain. Forcing children obtain heavy materials such subjects in a formal school can possible lead frustration and cause failure in academic. The materials which are introduced to the children should be adjusted to their capacity. As stated by Director of Early Childhood Education (ECE), Ministry of Education, Dr. Gutama, the intelligence capacity reached 80% at the age of 8 years. This shows the importance of providing stimulation in early childhood, before entering primary school.

In conclusion, in spite of the fact that early age of children is the golden period to learn and comprehend something new, the parents should consider the development of their children's brain before enroll the children in a formal education.

Writing Feedback / The Level of Three Predominant Exports in Southland [3]

The given bar chart provides information about the level of three predominant exports in Southland in 2000: 2016 and 2025 as a projected year, a 25-year period and is measured in the billions of pound. At first glance, it can be obviously seen that international tourism sector was the greatest export in the beginning year as well as at the end of the period, while meat products show the reverse. In any case, dairy products experience the highest proportion in a current year.

Moving to a detailed analysis, the amount of earning in the tourism sectors stood at higher than £8 billion in 2000, the rate then increases to virtually £9 billion in the next 16 years. Interestingly, 2025 forecasted to experience a significant growth, with the rate reaching a high of £10 billion. Meanwhile, the amount of income from meat products sector began at £6 billion and fall gradually to roughly £5,5 billion in the recent year. Moreover, the rate will decline steadily by £0,5 billion compared to the previous 10 years.

With regard to the international export of dairy product sectors, the level began at almost £7 billion. In the following 16 years, the rate increases sharply and speak at 10 billion. However, the rate forecasted decrease considerably at just over £9 billion in the end of the period.

• 
  
  

Writing Feedback / DO THE COLOURS INFLUENCE THE PURCHASING DECISION? IELTS Task 2 [2]

Colour is a powerful tool that is used to great effect by manufactures and retail companies when they try to sell us something. In fact, many of the purchasing decisions we make are partly or largely influenced by colour. How true is this statement? How much does colour influence us when we buy something?

These days, a great number of manufacturers enrich the colour of their product as they assume that the majority of customers have a tendency to purchase certain goods based on its colour. In my point of view, this consideration is indeed true because someone is generally fascinated by the certain colour. However, unfortunately, colour is not the strongest factor that influences customer decision in purchasing a product. Instead, the price and the brand of product are the dominant factors that customer are generally taken into consideration.

It is true that colour can possibly influence someone's decision when purchasing certain goods such as cloth or cell phone. This is because physical appearance like the colour has a special allure to impress human's attention. For instance, in semiotics is explained that colour has an influence toward someone mood and interest. Hence, a great number of companies consider enriching the types of colours on their products to attract attention of the customers as well as improve their sales.

Nevertheless, apparently, colour is not the only one factor that can affect customers' interests to buy something. The price and the brand of the product precisely have a significant role in attracting costumers' interest that should be taken into account. The majority of people tend to consider the brand of the certain product before they purchase it as well as mull its price due to quality and affordability reasons. A recent poll by the customer in a Mega Mall Indonesia reveals that 48% of customers tend to ask the price of a product before purchasing it, while almost 38% of customers buy a certain commodity based on its brand.

To sum up, in spite the fact that colour obviously influence someone's interest to buy a product, but apparently colours of certain product are just a final consideration when the costumer has felt compatible with the price and the quality of the product.