|Home / Writing Feedback [23,841] - page 248 of 398|
|TOEFL; What's more important: hard work or luck? not reckon on luck in our plan
Writing Feedbacktarbiat - Aug 16, 2013 / Pahan - Aug 17, 2013
|Last few years, authority as well as government is highly concerned about the school atmosphere.
6 - instead of "student's manner" you could use "Etiquette" For instance, mother/father = for instance parents to conclude...
Writing Feedbackfahadbd - Aug 16, 2013 / Dreqc - Aug 18, 2013
|GRE ; Advancing our understanding of the world
2 - Accepted Wisdom is correct in mosesome cases and can be exper imented. overall, your writing is good...
Writing Feedbackshadman19922 - Aug 16, 2013 / fahadbd - Aug 16, 2013
|WHO HAVE BETTER INFLUENCE ON STUDENTS - TEACHERS OR PEERS?
4 - make your intro a little more captivating, hook the audience/reader. And like Dumi said, express your view lucidly, it...
Writing Feedbacktpo112358 - Aug 15, 2013 / Ivykid96 - Aug 16, 2013
|Ielts- The internet and change of lives
Writing Feedbacktmtrang91 - Aug 15, 2013 / tmtrang91 - Aug 16, 2013
|IELTS writing task 1 - line graph on usage of cars in the UK
Writing FeedbackHA254 - Aug 15, 2013 / Pahan - Aug 15, 2013
|Essay written on Back to basic; CBEST
Writing Feedbackpig1 - Aug 15, 2013 / Aakash13 - Aug 17, 2013
|Creative artists should be given the freedom to express - 'range of limitation'
Writing Feedbackfahadbd - Aug 15, 2013 / me4mbd - Aug 18, 2013
|IELTS Task2: Technological developments in the past few decades. Positive ?
4 - Hi Dumi / Pahan, Thanks for your time in correcting my essay. I have noted your points and will...
Writing FeedbackArun0506 - Aug 15, 2013 / Arun0506 - Aug 16, 2013
|IELTS- NECESSITY OF THIRD LEVEL EDUCATION FOR SUCCESS? AGREE OR DISAGREE?
Writing Feedbackblessy - Aug 15, 2013 / blessy - Aug 17, 2013
|IELTS_cultural traditions will be destroyed by developing tourism. right/wrong?
Writing FeedbackIbrahim_Xian - Aug 15, 2013 / Ibrahim_Xian - Aug 19, 2013
|What are some other reasons than money, that people work?
Writing FeedbackRpuiii - Aug 15, 2013 / Pahan - Aug 16, 2013
|IELTS TASK 2:Some people argue that the purpose of zoos is only to entertain people.
7 - great advice congchop! :) Your conclusion too needs to be aligned with your prompt. So you need...
Writing Feedbackraulfanc - Aug 15, 2013 / dumi - Aug 17, 2013
|TOEFL-- The inernet is dangerous and unreliable
Writing FeedbackHELLOJOY11 - Aug 14, 2013 / tarbiat - Aug 17, 2013
|Happiness is considered very important in life. 'Defining depends on the ages'
6 - ... Great hook....very impressive :) Most people have the tendency to link happiness with wealth or...
Writing Feedbackjustinjustinlee - Aug 14, 2013 / dumi - Aug 16, 2013
|Which source is more important? experience or books? TOEFL iBT
2 - One source of knowledge is not enough anymore in our rapid changing world.(end) andThe majority of the universities and...
Writing Feedbackfaheddarmoch - Aug 14, 2013 / fahadbd - Aug 15, 2013
|TOEFL topic: STUDYING ABROAD - LIKES AND DISLIKES
Writing Feedbacktarbiat - Aug 14, 2013 / tarbiat - Aug 15, 2013
|Gender equality in University Admission
6 - Thaks Dumi, sry for late reply.u r gentle,not rude at all,and the strcture really helps me a lot.and i...
Writing Feedbackking jane - Aug 14, 2013 / king jane - Aug 18, 2013
|GRE ISSUE- A public official must maintain the highest ethical and moral standards
3 - Read the caption below which is written on how the introduction (GRE Issue) should be constructed. Then compare what...
Writing Feedbackioancelot - Aug 14, 2013 / dumi - Aug 17, 2013
|IELTS Task 1 General training : A friend has agreed to look after your house and pets
5 - Well Arun.... by reading your prompt, I understand your friend has agreed to look after your house and pet...
Writing FeedbackArun0506 - Aug 14, 2013 / Pahan - Aug 20, 2013
|IELTS essay topic: Sharing of private information by the media?
3 - First, please open your threads meant for IELTS essays in the Writing Feedback forum. That helps you earn more...
Writing Feedbackmee_na_mee0913 - Aug 14, 2013 / dumi - Aug 15, 2013
|[IELTS] - Fatherhood implies environment provided by father to his children for their growth
8 - Well... I think you need to improve the essay structure. Below is what I generally recommend. You can follow...
Writing FeedbackBivek3 - Aug 13, 2013 / dumi - Aug 15, 2013
|Equal Oppurtunity And Parity in Pay. GRE Analyze an issue
3 - Thanks for the grammar and spell check. Would you like to say anything about the content of the essay...
Writing Feedbackshadman19922 - Aug 13, 2013 / shadman19922 - Aug 16, 2013
|Has people's interaction changed because of technology? IELTS
5 - people's .... In fact some have literally almost died down Old ways of communication is fading...
Writing Feedbackposdream - Aug 13, 2013 / Pahan - Aug 17, 2013
|HARD TIMES; My little son's surgery
3 - Dear dumi, tanks for notify me those points. What do you think about coherence and cohesion in my story?...
Writing Feedbackmitu63 - Aug 13, 2013 / mitu63 - Aug 13, 2013
|IELTS;Research suggests characteristics we are born with are stronger than experience
3 - ... this is a pretty simple idea, but you have presented it to sound very complicated. Be more...
Writing Feedbackgivemebrave - Aug 13, 2013 / Pahan - Aug 17, 2013
|IELTS TASK2:Student's loss interest in teaching profession
2 - .... why you narrow down the scope of your topic to students? Your prompt talks about young generation...
Writing Feedbackgmad06 - Aug 13, 2013 / dumi - Aug 13, 2013
|A person should be very careful when making a decision - think carefully before any judgement
8 - Think about how each paragraph connects to the previous one. For example, for your third paragraph, you could...
Writing Feedbacktesttaker - Aug 13, 2013 / Sybrinth - Aug 18, 2013
|IELTS: 'fish and chips' - Consumption of fast food by Australian teenagers
3 - The given chart illustrates the consumption of pizza, fish and chips and hamburgers of Australian adolescents from 1975...
Writing Feedbackmrabbas - Aug 13, 2013 / MisterWandering - Aug 13, 2013
|TOEFL- UNIVERSITY STUDENTS SHOULD ATTEND CLASSES OR NOT?
6 - I think your content is good and well developed, but you'd better use the topic sentences of your paragraphs...
Writing Feedbackalice0209 - Aug 13, 2013 / ramshah - Aug 18, 2013
|[TOEFL] The car use will definitely decrease in twenty years
Writing Feedbackjoyhu - Aug 12, 2013 / joyhu - Aug 14, 2013
|'Humans are bound to do mistakes' - I prefer machine made items
5 - Another reason is that machine made clothes isare less time consuming. There is lot of time wastage in...
Writing FeedbackLaw - Aug 12, 2013 / Pahan - Aug 17, 2013
|'avoiding sorrow' Happiness is considered very important in life.
Writing Feedbackfahadbd - Aug 12, 2013 / king jane - Aug 14, 2013
|Teachers' performance evaluation; 'People seldom agree with eachother'
Writing Feedbackfuqiangang - Aug 12, 2013 / Pahan - Aug 18, 2013
|The Internet is becoming more and more central to our lives
Writing Feedbackvantang1199 - Aug 12, 2013 / vantang1199 - Aug 15, 2013
|Entrepreuners and Jobs - GRE Issue essay (rate and comment)
3 - External factors have always had an impact on man and history and it shows that many a great or...
Writing Feedbackishas - Aug 11, 2013 / dumi - Aug 17, 2013
|Toefl:Should parents accompany their children to play games?
Writing Feedbackfuqiangang - Aug 11, 2013 / moonname - Aug 12, 2013
|What role the money plays on health, education and respect.
Writing Feedbackmitra es - Aug 11, 2013 / mitra es - Aug 12, 2013
|IELTS_should government pay for people's education and health care?
2 - .... Let see how it sounds when the order is changed slightly; First of all, education and medical...
Writing FeedbackIbrahim_Xian - Aug 11, 2013 / Pahan - Aug 15, 2013
|writing task 1 IELTS: writing a letter to your friend about a movie
4 - Hi Pooneh, To say the least, you made me smile while reading your letter..:) So about your letter,...
Writing Feedbackpooneh - Aug 11, 2013 / gmad06 - Aug 12, 2013
|SAME JOB Vs CHANGING JOBS - Discuss both views
Writing Feedbackpooneh - Aug 10, 2013 / dumi - Aug 17, 2013
|IELTS writing task 1- A letter to a friend about a movie that I am planning to watch
Writing Feedbackah_zafari - Aug 10, 2013 / ah_zafari - Aug 11, 2013
|IELTS writing task 2- Doing the same job for whole the life or changing it frequently
18 - Dear ah-zafary I really enjoyed your essay. I learned somany new structures from you. the only thing I saw...
Writing Feedbackah_zafari - Aug 10, 2013 / marmaria - Sep 14, 2013
|TOEFL:It is important for students to participate in school's leisure activities？
Writing Feedbackfuqiangang - Aug 10, 2013 / fuqiangang - Aug 13, 2013
|[Proficiency exams ]Argument essay arguing in favour of or against advertising..
4 - ... People include both sellers and buyers. That is to say they represent both advertisers and consumers. So,...
Writing FeedbackDeli52 - Aug 10, 2013 / Pahan - Aug 20, 2013
|Think of the most interesting class you have ever taken. Why did you enjoy this class
5 - .... both these sentences mean the same. Therefore one makes the other redundant. Combine both and form one...
Writing FeedbackLaw - Aug 10, 2013 / Pahan - Aug 15, 2013
|"Is Legalizing the Right Choice?" - It's the right decision!
3 - Marijuana has been gaining in popularity for many years and its popularity never ceased to grow until to...
Writing FeedbackWilliamProsch - Aug 10, 2013 / dumi - Aug 17, 2013
|Toefl: Treat pets like family members or not? 'it is not a good idea'
7 - I think the biggest problem with your essay is that it is too formal. It follows the traditional essay...
Writing Feedbackeden68 - Aug 10, 2013 / Sybrinth - Aug 17, 2013
|IELTS Essay : effects of advertisement on daily life
Writing Feedbackhuyenanh1508 - Aug 10, 2013 / Pahan - Aug 15, 2013
|[TOEFL] The characteristics of NEIGHBORS - Specific details and examples
Writing Feedbackramshah - Aug 10, 2013 / joyhu - Aug 13, 2013
|GRE Analytical writing task - scientific discoveries help in understanding the world.
Writing Feedbackprepbuddy - Aug 10, 2013 / dumi - Aug 15, 2013
|TOEFL _ Should high school students be made wear uniform or not?
5 - .... this has grammar issues; ....prevent them from wasting their time on discussing over what they wear. prevent...
Writing Feedbackmoonname - Aug 10, 2013 / dumi - Aug 12, 2013
|Popular events like the Football World Cup release patriotic emotions.
6 - no problem :) I tell the guys who post in wrong forums with the intention of correcting the usage...
Writing Feedbackcongchop - Aug 10, 2013 / dumi - Aug 16, 2013
|IELTS: Public Libraries and computer technology
Writing Feedbackjflo - Aug 10, 2013 / dumi - Aug 15, 2013
|IELTS - 'slight difference'; The illiteracy rates around the world
Writing Feedbackxucoi - Aug 10, 2013 / Pahan - Aug 17, 2013
|[TOEFL] Environmental protection V.S Economic developments
3 - They are both important because they are vital to human'sour future and welfare. However, since resources are...
Writing Feedbackalice0209 - Aug 10, 2013 / dumi - Aug 12, 2013
|IELTS ; Some people are born with talents while others are not!
4 - While there is some truth in saying that talents can be trained, certain fields such as music and...
Writing Feedbackashupatel67 - Aug 9, 2013 / Pahan - Aug 12, 2013
|IELTS: How to encourage people to use public transport?
3 - ... well.... I think this is not a fare statement. In many countries, even developed countries in the...
Writing Feedbackposdream - Aug 9, 2013 / Pahan - Aug 10, 2013
|'the life itself'; PARENTS Vs TEACHERS ; Reasons & Examples
5 - .... this is an incomplete sentence. This is alright for your speaking task, but in writing you need...
Writing Feedbackfaheddarmoch - Aug 9, 2013 / Pahan - Aug 16, 2013
|IELTS Task 2-Some people think that travel helps gaining knowledge
Writing Feedbackbobinv - Aug 9, 2013 / MisterWandering - Aug 11, 2013
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