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|TV makes children passive. Every image and sound is delivered continually.
3 - Personally I think that you should avoid single sentences and try to put complex sentences. Moreover, you should emphasize...
Writing Feedbackdophuong - Mar 15, 2011 / SuYper - Mar 15, 2011
|Cause and Effects Essay: Evolving trends of text messaging
3 - The customer pushes their cart to ...------Their goes with a plural noun. It IS okay to do this, but...
Writing Feedbacknmartin500 - Mar 15, 2011 / EF_Kevin - Mar 18, 2011
|I can't agree fully with the demand of equality of number between genders in the universities
4 - I think we should get rid of "and" here: And According to them the selection occurs so that the...
Writing Feedbackkimo1234 - Mar 14, 2011 / EF_Kevin - Mar 18, 2011
|IELTS Taks 2 - People meet many obstacles on borrowing money from banks.
4 - hi, Its a real good essay. your points are very clear and quite strong.But you should also be ready...
Writing FeedbackSuYper - Mar 14, 2011 / ajit88rai - Mar 15, 2011
|"What is life?" - Senior Paper
3 - I don't think this is a good way to use the word "quoted"----> Tupac Shakur quoted; "Why am ......
Writing FeedbackDimples2011 - Mar 14, 2011 / EF_Kevin - Mar 18, 2011
|"Parents are first" - narrative essay
12 - I am asma fiqi, and I have worked with various companies throughout my life. They include St. Jude...
Writing Feedbacklittle sun - Mar 13, 2011 / EF_Kevin - Mar 25, 2011
|DO WE RELY HEAVILY ON TECHNOLOGY ?
6 - The only thing is if feel like this is awkward: I personally utilize technology in my daily routine whether...
Writing Feedbackstooks - Mar 13, 2011 / bellawings90210 - Mar 18, 2011
|'pets have many viruses'; Many people have a close relationship with their pets.
4 - It might be better to say a close connection instead of a close contact. "Close contact" means something that...
Writing Feedbackholic117 - Mar 13, 2011 / EF_Kevin - Mar 17, 2011
|Underrated Vs Overrated by people - what is better?
2 - Great edit here... thanks, Jerber! Yes, 3rd person is better. I like this correction: meet the expected demand...
Writing Feedbackcathchen - Mar 13, 2011 / EF_Kevin - Mar 20, 2011
|What role should Australia play in future world affairs?
15 - Thanks Laura :) yeah it is awesome I've got an extension, I've only had a couple weeks of school...
Writing Feedbackgracean - Mar 13, 2011 / Alien - Apr 2, 2011
|Happiness, tobacco, elderly, child activities, English, population control, immunise
4 - Smoking tobacco like other dangerous drugs should be made illegal. Agree or disagree? The issue of prohibiting cigarette...
Writing Feedbackgeekinthepink - Mar 13, 2011 / dumi - Mar 16, 2011
|[TOEFL] The Deceiving Advertisement
3 - Soleley is an adverb, and sole is an adjective. You should use sole in this case: Because the sole...
Writing FeedbackBorislav - Mar 13, 2011 / EF_Kevin - Mar 13, 2011
|IELTS - humans should be able to use animals for their own benefit?
6 - I suppose your writing is great and it deserves band 7 if considering the suggestions of 'TransferringStu'. BTW,...
Writing Feedbackdranu78 - Mar 13, 2011 / kelp0308 - Mar 31, 2011
|Being Perfect not only in school
5 - I take this issue from my own reality, so it's quite interesting and I have enthusiasm to write it....
Writing FeedbackSnowQueen - Mar 12, 2011 / SnowQueen - Mar 16, 2011
|"parents can not be termed as the best teachers"
3 - It is quite true that the first lessons of one's life are learned through parents but that does not...
Writing Feedbackrabiamomin - Mar 12, 2011 / EF_Kevin - Mar 15, 2011
|"increase interest" - Teachers should encourage their students to question everything
3 - As I see, other people checked your essay, I just have some comments : You should avoid the very...
Writing Feedbackvaishali1980 - Mar 12, 2011 / SuYper - Mar 14, 2011
|An essay on 'tiger mom' - what should an ideal education be like?
Writing Feedbackzailn - Mar 12, 2011 / zailn - Mar 22, 2011
|Keys To College Success Summary Writing Assignment
8 - I like this essay. It is very clear and meaningful. I think the last paragraph could have another 2...
Writing Feedbackironhawk893 - Mar 11, 2011 / EF_Kevin - Mar 14, 2011
|(more time for relationship and health care) - A job with more vacation time?
NEW - Topic: A job with more vacation time is better than a job with high salary but less vacation time...
Writing Feedbacksabrinayaa - Mar 11, 2011 / — -
|"for a better world to live" - wealthy nations to share their wealth among other
3 - Thanks, Nadine. You are cool! I want to talk about this mistake at the beginning. Here are some...
Writing FeedbackArdhitya - Mar 10, 2011 / EF_Kevin - Mar 14, 2011
|Eulogy of Morrie schwartz by Charlotte schwartz.
Writing FeedbackDude - Mar 10, 2011 / Dude - Mar 12, 2011
|Study at home using technology or study at traditional schools?
9 - Thank you!...
Writing Feedbackghost1 - Mar 10, 2011 / ghost1 - Mar 14, 2011
|"your claim of being a bona fide student in New Zealand" - GAP YEARS EXPLAINATION
Writing Feedbacktakanguyen - Mar 10, 2011 / takanguyen - Mar 14, 2011
|The Key Qualities of an Ethical Teacher - What is my stand on this? -Essay paragraph
Writing Feedbackmpvick - Mar 9, 2011 / mpvick - Mar 12, 2011
|TOEFL: Important qualities of a good supervisor (boss)
6 - I'll correct some of the grammar, and I hope you practice each correction 10 times. That will teach you...
Writing Feedbackkarlenin - Mar 9, 2011 / EF_Kevin - Mar 13, 2011
|IELTS task 2: Noise levels have impact the quality of our life?
Writing Feedbackdevil - Mar 9, 2011 / EF_Kevin - Mar 13, 2011
|TOEFL: MORE VOCATION TIME Vs HIGHER SALARY
3 - Awesome, Kathy... Ellen, can you easily understand the corrections made here? Some people think money is everything,...
Writing Feedbackeating105 - Mar 9, 2011 / EF_Kevin - Mar 13, 2011
|Cambridge IELFTS - Prevention is better than cure. Health education.
Writing FeedbackPony - Mar 9, 2011 / Pony - Mar 16, 2011
|Toefl - It would be tragic if we put the wrong metric on judging people (external appearance)
4 - However, other people regard outer appearances as something very important indicators.-----I changed it so that it would make sense...
Writing Feedbackosooo - Mar 9, 2011 / EF_Kevin - Mar 13, 2011
|[TOEFL] The real source of success (courageous and bold people)
6 - Ha ha, okay, I'll check it out. I don't think you used the word resentful correctly here. You...
Writing FeedbackBorislav - Mar 9, 2011 / EF_Kevin - Mar 13, 2011
|TOEFL - Parents are the best teachers? No, it does not hold for every case!
5 - Impressive! You are ready for the toefl. Just forget about it and move on to other challenges. When you...
Writing Feedbackg8231226702 - Mar 9, 2011 / EF_Kevin - Mar 13, 2011
|TOEFL: Does Television destroy our bonds with friends and family?
6 - That's always great advice. When you argue, show the opponent and audience that you do understand their reasoning and...
Writing Feedbacksabrinayaa - Mar 9, 2011 / EF_Kevin - Mar 22, 2011
|School board to increase the physical education requirement to three years - CBEST
Writing FeedbackKarla - Mar 8, 2011 / adam20 - Mar 29, 2011
|New generation no more read books. Is this complaint true?
4 - Let's say "the modern generation" The modern generation does not... have time to visit a public library to...
Writing Feedbackjomse - Mar 8, 2011 / EF_Kevin - Mar 12, 2011
|"War Is Hell" - English Descriptive Essay
Writing FeedbackAthanatos - Mar 8, 2011 / EF_Kevin - Mar 11, 2011
|IELTS - museums and art galleries will disappear soon?
2 - I don't think Chinglish is something to avoid. People from different parts of America and Europe speak very...
Writing FeedbackShrek Fiona - Mar 7, 2011 / EF_Kevin - Mar 12, 2011
|More and more people claim that modern work patterns are a source of stress.
3 - ...results of temporary work patterns which have formed stressful lifestyles for people of the modern generation. Resolutions can be...
Writing Feedbackmegiacodon - Mar 7, 2011 / EF_Kevin - Mar 12, 2011
|Some people spend the entire lives in one place. Others move a number of times.
3 - believes Keep it plural: ...new people, new cultures, and new beliefs that are all so amazing to me; I...
Writing Feedbackmahrou - Mar 7, 2011 / EF_Kevin - Mar 12, 2011
|Young people have no influence on the decisions about the society
Writing Feedbacksunnycoastwang - Mar 6, 2011 / sunnycoastwang - Mar 13, 2011
|Describe the "TRAITS OF A LEADER" . Which of those fits you best ?
4 - In academic writing, professors often expect you to use at least 3 or 4 sentences in a paragraph....
Writing Feedbackstooks - Mar 6, 2011 / EF_Kevin - Mar 12, 2011
|GRE Sample: "Scientific Fact Invariably Proves to be Inaccurate"
3 - Impressive writing! Let me make some suggestions. Almost anything is as much something as it is nothing.---no commas....
Writing Feedbackkgw - Mar 6, 2011 / EF_Kevin - Mar 12, 2011
|Improving your knowledge and dealing with other people - reasons to attend school
Writing Feedbackg8231226702 - Mar 6, 2011 / g8231226702 - Mar 13, 2011
|Narrative Essay: Fun with Elders
4 - => all I could see were the smiling faces (your sentences in past tense, so use "could" instead of...
Writing Feedbackbbish520 - Mar 6, 2011 / KathyLala - Mar 7, 2011
|"early childhood teachers and classrooms" - article reflection
5 - Okay Sylvia Brown, let's simplify this intro: To begin with, m My two little critiques are about the vagueness...
Writing Feedbackmintchoco - Mar 6, 2011 / EF_Kevin - Mar 12, 2011
|Do you agree or disagree that people benefit more traveling in their own country ...?
3 - Recently, people have more chances to travel around the world, and it has become more affordable. They travel...
Writing FeedbackPeifen - Mar 6, 2011 / EF_Kevin - Mar 12, 2011
|Is it better to live for the moment or plan for the future?
Writing Feedbackkrauser - Mar 6, 2011 / EF_Kevin - Mar 12, 2011
|'Equalitarianism manifest' - the same number of male and female students.
Writing FeedbackBarbieTsu - Mar 6, 2011 / EF_Kevin - Mar 11, 2011
|Admired characteristic to understand ourselves
6 - Thanks for your help Kevin! @Jhonies Saysi! I have been trying very hard for my writing. I switched my...
Writing FeedbackKathyLala - Mar 5, 2011 / KathyLala - Mar 11, 2011
|Understanding, responsible - important qualities of a good supervisor /boss/?
2 - => When a supervisor hires employees, he or she expects from them to do their best at working places....
Writing FeedbackVarbanov - Mar 5, 2011 / KathyLala - Mar 7, 2011
|SAT - Failure is the beginning of education
Writing Feedbackcathchen - Mar 5, 2011 / cathchen - Mar 13, 2011
|IELTS; Children need to recieve the proper education before engaging in paid work
Writing Feedbackglars908 - Mar 4, 2011 / glars908 - Mar 6, 2011
|Old aged people go to live in homes, who should bear the fee - government or family
2 - You should write small sentences instead of many commas. You should mention clearly introduction and conclusion paragraph about your...
Writing Feedbackmohang - Mar 4, 2011 / vaishali1980 - Mar 6, 2011
|"Listening to music and reading" - Things That Inspire Me
2 - Hey, Delilah, this is a very thoughtful critique! Rebenrio, I think you did very well with this! It has...
Writing Feedbackbutterbescotch - Mar 4, 2011 / EF_Kevin - Mar 9, 2011
|Traveling to get job . . Environment is the Victim
5 - This part needs a little change: Firstly, government can provide or increase public transportation and make workers about...
Writing FeedbackMahrooo - Mar 4, 2011 / EF_Kevin - Mar 10, 2011
|Internet is valuable information for everyone, if we know how to use it properly
3 - Nowadays, the Internet plays an... People who have a mobile phone or a computer will be able to...
Writing Feedbackzezaar66 - Mar 4, 2011 / EF_Kevin - Mar 9, 2011
|Analytical writing: "Education will be truly effective only if individually..."
2 - Well, this is not really about emphasis on quality, is it? It is about specialization. The intro paragraph...
Writing Feedbackkak3521 - Mar 3, 2011 / EF_Kevin - Mar 5, 2011
|TOEFL-"forest is disappearing but needs to be saved."
Writing FeedbackY529 - Mar 3, 2011 / Y529 - Mar 21, 2011
|"The smell of the library is different" - a descriptive essay (library)
Writing Feedback92angel - Mar 3, 2011 / Mahrooo - Mar 4, 2011
|People in our modern age stay longer than in the past generation
3 - I like the way Keng used the word "stay." It is poetic and cool. But for improving clarity, let's...
Writing FeedbackKeng - Mar 3, 2011 / EF_Kevin - Mar 9, 2011
|Contrasting between two jobs (commuting, hours, job type)
3 - In addition, the second job was closer to me. In addition, the second job was closer for me. ...
Writing Feedbackmalakot - Mar 2, 2011 / EF_Kevin - Mar 8, 2011
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