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Abercrombie part time impact team member - How to make this resume sound better


alswn95 11 / 28  
Jul 26, 2010   #1
Volunteer, YMCA Richmond Hill, Ontario 2009 - to the present
Learnt leadership skills
Learnt how to solve problems
Learnt how to communicate effectively
Volunteer, Medic 8 Clinic Richmond Hill, Ontario 2010 - to the present
Learnt how to file
Learnt how to organize file
Organized and tidied the area
Assistant Helper, Young Nak Church Toronto, Ontario 2010
Made powerpoint presentation
Photocopied papers
Participated in group activities
Child Care Taker, Young Nak Church Toronto, Ontario 2010
Took care of children under the age of 13
Organized games
Kept children

Objective:
Objective: Seeking a position as a Abercrombie part time impact team member where my communication and organizations skills will be utilized to their maximum
rajeshaaidu 2 / 31  
Jul 26, 2010   #2
Dear Kang,

You should modify the objective of the resume. It's somewhat offensive. Please, try to make it something like that where both of you (you and team) will be benefited by working together.

Thanks,
Rajesh
EF_Kevin 8 / 13320 129  
Jul 27, 2010   #3
Add an anecdote or example to each of these job descriptions. They are unimpressive if left the way they are. It is better to write a little descriptin of each job and use complete sentences. Can you think of an example for each job?

I also recommend writing a little introductory blurb to tell the reader why you are interested in this company. You can be honest. If you have a sincere, modest goal and want to do a good job, and if you mention the employer's name on the resume, they will be very impressed! So, I think it is great that you put the company's name in the objective. But make a change:

Seeking a position as a Abercrombie part time impact team member where my communication and organizational skills will be make me a valuable asset.


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