Business Emails

Hi All,

Can we please raise this topic? Business letters and emails. Which are generally short in text. Or please write if there is already a space/thread meant for this.

BTW why I am starting this is a problem in my own composition.

I am a hiring consultant and do most of my work through emails. Around 40-60 emails a day.

I find myself pretty OK in vocab and grammar but the problem is I tend to write very long sentences and can not figure out when to break and start a new one. (like this one)

e.g.

One of the emails I sent today

Please see if you can evaluate Sarvanan's and Apurva CVs so that we may schedule their interviews in coming week in accordance with Sanjeev's preferences.

Do I lack in grammar or something? Or has it just become my style of writing. I this doesn't help reader to keep focus on what I am trying to say and they might miss out on something important.

Comments requested.

This is what I would do:

Please see if you can evaluate Sarvanan's and Apurva's CVs, so that we may schedule their interviews infor theup coming week in accordance withperhaps "according to" would sound more clear? Sanjeev's preferences.

What you need the most, however, is the proper use of punctuation; breaking a long sentence with a couple of commas where needed really makes it much easier to comprehend.