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Formal recommendation letter re: the vacation job


learningtowrite 32 / 50  
Jul 25, 2008   #1
Hi, can you help me check through this letter? This is one of my assignments. I'm particularly worried about my tone. It should be respectful and formal. Can you tell me if it is appropriate?

Dear Mrs. Lim

Re: The Vacation Job

On behalf of my class, thank you for offering us this one-week vacation job. After much consideration, we have unanimously decided on participating as student reporters for the national newspaper.

All of our classmates share a common interest in writing. Many of them are our school magazine correspondents. Most of us have been chosen to represent the school in writing competitions, and we managed to clinch high-ranking positions in the National Essay writing Competition earlier this year. Based on our interests, we would love to hone our writing skills through practical work, and working as student reporters will provide us with just the skills we need.

By working as student reporters, we all have the chance to observe how a newspaper is produced. The senior reporters will provide us help along the way, as we explore the different aspects in a newspaper. We are given the chance to conduct our personal interviews with the athlete champions, students at our age, who have won over different categories at the National Youth Sporting Championship. This hands-on experience will provide us with more effective communication skills, benefiting us in any career that we may choose in the future. After that, the senior reporters will continue to help us by editing our articles and reports; presentation skills, for example, how to enclose useful illustrations to the articles will also be taught. We will certainly improve our critical thinking and writing techniques through close coordination with these experienced correspondents.

After one week working at the national newspaper, we hope that we can improve our formal writing skills as well as our communication skills. With these valuable lessons, we will apply and fine-tune our compositions at school, our articles in the school magazine as well as our works in the future career. Moreover, working as student reporters allows us to enjoy the freedom of travelling like real correspondents; understanding the working environment of the journalists will help us consider our future career more wisely, especially for those who wish to work in the media sector.

The other career guidance programs are both very effective in giving us the insights of the work scope. However, we have already experienced being tutors in the Peer Mentoring Program organised by the school. The skills to organise a store and display stocks attractively introduced in the Sales Job program are also very useful; nonetheless we had had workshop addressing these skills before we held our School Carnival this May. The job as a reporter will thus suit our class more, as it provides us with brand-new experience on the field that we unanimously agreed on.

I hope that you will consider our class's recommendation. Thank you for your kind attention.

Yours sincerely
EF_Team5 - / 1,586  
Jul 26, 2008   #2
Good morning.

I think the tone is appropriate. You are gracious yet professional, and you let your reader know that you are interested in her offering and why. Go ahead and remove the "Re: The Vacation Job" as this is usually reserved for memo writing. Also, don't forget your comma after your reader's name and after the closing.

Regards,
Gloria
Moderator, EssayForum.com
EF_Team5 - / 1,586  
Jul 31, 2008   #4
Any time.

Regards,
Gloria
Moderator, EssayForum.com


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