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Help me out to apply for Management Consulting Firm with this cover letter

marlynoktavia 1 / -  
Jun 8, 2019   #1
Hi @Holt and everyone, would you kindly review my cover letter to apply for a management consulting firm?
Thank you very much for the kind assistance :)

i am a candidate for the Consultant position

Dear Sir/ Madam,

With this letter, I would like to introduce myself as a candidate for the Consultant position at [COMPANY]. As a well-educated and qualified candidate, I believe I can give my contribution to the growth of [COMPANY].

My interest in consulting can be dated back to when I had a chance to be involved in a project funded by the government to do a research about ASEAN Economic Community's Impacts towards Indonesia's Manpower. I assisted my academic adviser on research and slice and dicing on detailed factors that were important to complete the project. After the project finished, I found that I had a significant interest to pursue my career where I can do research and problem solving activities of which are the major work of a business consultant.

The first reason of my disposition to work at [COMPANY] is for its whole purpose as a company. The company strives to build capabilities that enable organizations to achieve breakthrough improvements in the short term, while significantly raising their performance trajectory long term. Not only does it succeeds to come on top of consulting industry, the company continuously develop the people and values relationship as the key to success. During my current role as a consultant at Mercer, my responsibilities include conducting research and gathering data, interviewing my clients' employees and stakeholders, facilitating focus groups discussions, constructing presentations and proposals, according recommendations to the client, and preserving clear communication with the clients. I have advised clients located in Indonesia, Thailand, Singapore, and Vietnam. During my career, I helped clients to revamp their organization capabilities that have refined companies' brands and increased their competitiveness in the market. I aspire to create a long-term relationship with each client and firmly believe that it will be valuable for my journey at [COMPANY].

My bachelor's degree in International Relations from Parahyangan Catholic University and TU Dortmund has proved to be invaluable during my career as a Consultant. My studies in International Political Economy, International Law of Economics, Economics, and Statistics provided me with the critical mindset I needed to be successful in this field. I gained valuable communication and time management skills leading me to pride myself in my ability to produce quality work efficiently.

Believing in people, opportunities, and growth, [COMPANY] inspired me to be both contributive and respectful. With my hardworking attitude, analytical thinking, and interpersonal skill and, I believe that I will be an asset to [COMPANY]. I thank you for the opportunity. I look forward for further process.

Best regards,

Marlyn Oktavia

Maria - / 1,100 389  
Jun 8, 2019   #2
Hello there!

I can offer you a little bit of assistance for your essay.

First and foremost, may I suggest shifting the overall tone of your essay to a firmer one? There's numerous techniques that you can implement in order to accomplish this. A primary method that I always tell people would be to try and curate direct to the point content for you to focus more attention to the depth of your substance. I'll demonstrate what this means in practice later on.

Additionally, using integrated terminologies or merged words will help you trim down the excesses of your essay, causing you to have more hold over the message you are conveying. I feel as though a common pattern among learners and writers alike is to incorporate repetitive lines in hopes that it would stretch the meaning. But rather than adding depth, you are exaggerating the content without actually adding content and meaning. Knowing how to differentiate these two writing techniques is critical.

With both of these in mind, let's take a look at (in particular) your third paragraph. While the written output itself is put-together and has the distinctive complexity necessary to showcase professionalism, there were instance wherein it collided with the overall meaning of your essay. What I suggest is trying to rephrase particular lines to structure it a better light. For example, take this revision:

The company strives to curate both short-term and long-term capabilities based on sustainable and breakthrough projects. build capabilities ... term. Not only does it succeeds ... industry pave way for extravagant achievements in consultancy work, the company is able to develop both the people and their values., the company ... success.

Notice how I was able to relay synonymous meaning while still maintaining structured work. Keep these in mind.

Best of luck as always. Don't be afraid to come again if you have more queries!

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