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Motivation letter for student visa study M.Sc. Animal Sciences at the University of Bonn


Hanyseif 1 / 1  
Jul 3, 2018   #1
From: Hany Abdelnasser Kamel Aboseif

To: The Consulate General, Embassy of the Federal Republic of Germany - Cairo
2, Berlin Street, Zamalek, Cairo, Egypt

13.06.2018

Letter of Motivation for the purpose of Student Visa Application



Dear officials of the embassy,

Firstly, I would like to introduce myself. My name is Hany Aboseif. I finished my high school in 2006 with a grade of 96.3%. Since I have a great passion for animals, I attended the Faculty of Veterinary Medicine, Cairo University and graduated in 2011 with a grade of good. With this letter, I am going to explain my motives for being granted a student visa to study M.Sc. Animal Sciences at the University of Bonn, which spans for 2 years starting from winter semester 2018/2019.

In 1709 the disaster of cattle plague invaded the whole world resulting in massive losses in livestock and economy. By 1865, Europe lost about 200 million cattle and Africa lost 80 - 90% of its livestock, which was worth about 2 billion dollars. In Egypt, the losses were catastrophic, because the Egyptian economy was depending on agriculture and livestock. This drove the authorities at that time to establish the first school of veterinary medicine in 1827 to maintain the Egyptian livestock and save the economy. Currently, the Egyptian livestock is facing similar challenges and stumbling blocks that have a bad impact on Egypt's economy. Diseases like Foot and Mouth disease (FMD), Rift Valley Fever (RVF) and Avian Influenza (H5N1) have become endemic, resulting in heavy losses every year. This fact motivated me to do more advanced studies in the field of animal sciences because my country is in need of highly qualified professionals to restore its glory and become one of the leading countries in the world.

By all means, I found Germany the best place to pursue my master degree. It has the largest dairy cattle herd and the second largest cattle population in the EU. Cattle production contributes about 25 % to agricultural output in Germany. So, studying in Germany will enable me to take close look at the success of Germany in the field of livestock and apply this experience in my homeland. Another reason is that most German universities offer world-class education with no tuition fees. Additionally, the cost of living in Germany is affordable for me as a student. Therefore, I consider Germany - more than any other country - as the land of ideas and opportunities because it supports students and researchers, who contribute to its development and prosperity. No wonder that it comes the third in the number of Nobel Prize laureates. This mixture of educational quality, educational affordability, and international environment is rare to be all found in one country. For this reason, I decided to pursue my master degree in Germany and exerted an effort to learn German to be able to integrate into the German society and benefit from the German education system.

My decision to pursue graduate studies at The University of Bonn is motivated by the fact that it is one of the world's leading research-based Universities that cooperates with many universities and research establishments across the globe. It is ranked among top 100 universities internationally, which means that a degree from this university will be accredited all over the world. It is interesting to know that Wolfgang Paul and Reinhard Selten, who are Nobel laureates were professors at The University of Bonn. This fact reflects the inveterate history of this university and the scientific level of its professors, accordingly, I will be taught by top researchers and experts. The University of Bonn assures an international atmosphere that will help me get immersed in the German culture through student organizations and the Summer and Winter Schools. It is for this reason that I have decided to apply to the University of Bonn as I feel it has the right mixture of academic professionalism, welcoming atmosphere and vibrant social scene that can help me to grow professionally and emotionally.

It was for my honor to be one of the 5% international students selected for this restricted master program at The University of Bonn. The M.Sc. Animal Sciences at the University of Bonn is a two years program, which aims at teaching students ecological and resource-efficient production of food of animal origin. This program consists of 6 compulsory modules, which will teach me methods of animal breeding, production technologies, ways to address issues of animal nutrition as well as strategies for preventative protection of livestock against diseases. In addition to 4 elective modules, which will give me a chance to deepen my knowledge in preferred areas of specialization. A characteristic feature of this course is project modules and seminars, in which I will be trained to structure, organize, analyze and present research projects in a scientific way. For this reason, I chose this program, because it will enrich my knowledge as a veterinarian, as it integrates theories and practice in the field of animal sciences.

The M.Sc. Animal Sciences will provide me with the basic scientific concepts that will enable me to compete vigorously in my career. My professional goal from this course is to work as a veterinary advisor in one of the veterinary pharmaceutical companies, where I will provide technical support for products in the company, respond to field inquiries and set up and direct pharmaceutical trials. By this way, I can contribute to the prosperity of livestock in Egypt and help to improve the Egyptian economy.

Lastly, allow me to express that I do strongly believe that studying this master course in Germany is a crucial step in my careerĀ¬. I am looking forward to your positive response. Please accept my deepest appreciation and gratitude for your further assessment and consideration.

Yours Sincerely,

Hany Abd Elnasser Kamel Aboseif
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,835 4783  
Jul 4, 2018   #2
Hany, you only need to use paragraphs 5,6, and 7 for this motivational letter for the student visa. Your explanation in these paragraphs regarding your motivation are strong and straightforward. These paragraphs already explain everything that needs to be explained regarding your motivation to study in Germany. You have given acceptable reasons to help the consul believe that you will be leaving Germany at the end of 2 years. However, if you can include a statement that indicates how you plan to return to your home country during your vacations and you will not be seeking employment in Germany while attending school there, you should be able to further convince the consul that he has nothing to worry about with regards to you possible circumventing the student visa rules.

So all you have to do to edit this essay is remove the first 4 paragraphs. Those are useless because those are historical in text, which is not really relevant to your masters degree motivation. No, not even you high school academic background is important in the motivational letter. As you can tell from the name of the letter, it is all about motivation or the force driving you to study advanced courses in relation to your profession for the betterment of your career.
OP Hanyseif 1 / 1  
Jul 4, 2018   #3
Thank you Holt for your comprehensive feedback. I know that the letter is long (980 words), but I tried to answer all the questions regarding student visa application according to The DAAD (please have a look on attached screenshot).

I agree that it is too long. Could you please give me some tips in order to summarize it as much as possible, but without missing any question.

Thanks in advance





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