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Hate poem - I need some words that end in ing describing this feeling


maria /  
May 2, 2007   #1
Thank you for editing
i need some words that end in ing describing hate... i founded some but i need some more...Can you please help me out....
Thank you soo much....i have done half of my poem but i need more words describing hate ending in ing to finish it ,, After i finish can you please edit that poem for me?

thank you
OP maria /  
May 2, 2007   #2
This is what i got soo far for a diamante poem
Love
Devotion, adoration
admiring, desiring, relishing
valuing, sacrificing, scorning,(need another word ending in ing for hate)
Loathing, despising, burning
detestation,(Need another word word not ending in ing)
Hate

Can you please edit this poem for me...And try to the 2 words that i got stuck on, thank you
EF_Team2 1 / 1,708  
May 2, 2007   #3
Greetings!

Here are some ideas: revulsing, revolting, abhorring

After detestation, perhaps execration? abominate?

Your middle line makes an abrupt change from positive (valuing) to negative (scorning); was that the idea--to switch suddenly? Or should there be more of a transition?

If you're not using an online thesaurus, I'd highly recommend it! I find it very useful when I can't think of the right word.

Thanks,

Sarah, EssayForum.com
EF_Team2 1 / 1,708  
May 3, 2007   #4
Greetings!

I like the poem you have written! As far as I can tell, it is, indeed, a contrast poem. I have a suggestion, though. I think you use "incomplete" too many times. If you can find a different way to say the same thing in the first two lines, I think it will be better. For example:

My breath was shallow
My heart beat faint [or slow, or timid, or muted-- you could put lots of things here]
Incomplete was I
But now the moon is full
Complete in the sky
And now with you
Complete am I

Titles are fun. A lot of your poetry mentions roses or flowers, right? What about something like "A Garden of Poetry" or "Poem Rose Garden"? Robert Louis Stevenson has already taken "A Child's Garden of Verse" but yours could be a sort of allusion to that, without crossing the line of plagiarism.

You've done very well!

Thanks,

Sarah, EssayForum.com
OP maria /  
May 4, 2007   #5
THANK YOU SARAH....You have helped me alot throw my poetry unit...I no just saying thanks wont repay all you have done for me but stilll Thank You!!!!!!
OP maria /  
May 4, 2007   #6
I have to choose a theme such as Love, friendship, sports, peace, war etc. And then i have to write a 4 verse poem the that directly relates to the theme. My theme is love this is what i have created can you please edit it and and tell me if it make sense and if it is actually an poem:

The one who my heart
Took for my own
Is blissfully ignorant
The earth and the skies
However, know the truth

We did meet each others eyes
But modesty stood between us
I couldn't express in words
The feeling of my heart
There's now this excitement
Every moment
I must look for him
To him, I must
Pour out my heart
But where is he

The night seems to have blossomed
In the company of the moon
I'm away from him
Although I have met him
Yes, I have seen him
Why there's a twinkle
In my eyes
And a flutter in my heart
If only love would
Awaken in his heart
And bring him here

His the one my heart has
Accepted as my own
There he is blissfully ignorant
However the earth and the sky
Know the truth

I think the poem needs to be a bit smaller and needs some rhyming in it....Can you please try to do that...Thanks
OP maria /  
May 4, 2007   #7
After i write the four verse poem i need to turn it into a song...Thats why i really need help in rhyming....I also need to ask you does this poem relate to my theme love? Thanks
EF_Team2 1 / 1,708  
May 4, 2007   #8
Greetings!

Yes, I'd say your poem definitely relates to the theme of love very well! If it didn't have to become a song, it wouldn't necessarily need to rhyme. Because songs almost always have some sort of rhyming scheme, your poem probably should, too.

You already have some instances of rhyming; all you need to do is throw in a few more at regular intervals. I've done a little work on it, though I'm not sure I've improved it any; I liked it your way! See what you can do to finish! :=))

Good work!

Thanks,

Sarah, EssayForum.com
OP maria /  
May 5, 2007   #9
Because it has to be 4 verse i need to add one more verse...this is what i wrote:
If only love would awaken in his heart
And bring him here
Even for a moment
This madness is driving me restless

Can you please edit it and tell me if it make senses
thanks
EF_Team2 1 / 1,708  
May 5, 2007   #10
Greetings!

Well, it makes sense, but it doesn't rhyme. If it needs to, consider saying something like "this madness is tearing me apart" to rhyme with "heart."

Good job!

Thanks,

Sarah, EssayForum.com
OP maria /  
May 5, 2007   #11
This is what it say in my assignment to do after we create the poem-Prepare an artistic interpretation of your poem in the form of a song/rap/jingle or any other dramatic/artistc form(be creative as you want; you may want to use background music, rhythimic beats,instruments,props,video,images,etc)

Do you think this poem that we have created is good for any of this.If so can you tell what should i do in details because i am reallly stuck on this part..It a big presentation and i am reallly really stuck!

Thank you!
EF_Team2 1 / 1,708  
May 6, 2007   #12
Greetings!

I think your poem can be used creatively in any way you like. Your instructor has given you some suggestions. If you are not musically inclined, consider making it a visual presentation, perhaps making some pictures which illustrate the poem. If you cannot draw or paint, you could make a collage with images cut from magazines. They don't have to illustrate it literally; just express the feelings the poem evokes. The main thing is just to take your poem beyond the realm of simply being words and allow other art forms to add to it.

It has been said that we create our own reality. If you keep telling yourself that you're "really really stuck" then that is exactly what your reality will be. I really hope you will try saying to yourself instead, "I am a creative person; I can come up with some ideas to artistically interpret my poem!"

Even if you don't believe it at first, try it! I know that this type of positive reinforcement can work! And I also know that you are very creative--I can see it in your writing! Now, think positive thoughts and get to work! I want to know what you come up with! :-))

Thanks,

Sarah, EssayForum.com


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