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Poem about Friandship - can I try this one?


Melodi 1 / -  
Feb 27, 2008   #1
Friendship

A single word
A simple word
A great word that mean a lot to us
A wonderful word that would able to make us smile

War
A single word
An innocent word
But not in meaning
A horrible word that mean a lot to us
A cold word that would make us cry

If we had to choose
What would we choose?
What would we feel?
What would it mean to us?
Why do we even choose?
EF_Team2 1 / 1,708  
Feb 28, 2008   #2
Greetings!

I think you have a great start to your poem! I like the line about war being an "innocent" word. :-) Let me give you a few suggestions about the grammar:

A great word that means a lot to us
A wonderful word that can make us smile

A horrible word that means a lot to us - There is an implication with the phrase "that means a lot to me/us" that the thing is good, rather than bad; it might be better to say something like "A horrible word with grave meaning.."

Keep up the good work!

Thanks,

Sarah, EssayForum.com


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