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Poem about Nothing....

bilal ABUZENAH 15 / 81  
Nov 4, 2009   #1
please tell me your opinion a about this one, and If you have time please go to Poetry Writing section and check my poem.


Guys come back do not believe them...
Guys come back there is n othing...
Guys, because no thing you are there....
Guys not hing has noth ing to do with anything, so just come back, nothi ng is there...
Guys it was a joke when I read it I understood nothin g because there was nothing ...
Bilal Š
zebrasapien 1 / 8  
Nov 4, 2009   #2
That's good, but I didn't really get it. Was it really about nothing, or was it about something that was nothing? Were you missing commas after guys, or was that just a it should have been?

Also, any tips in poetry? I've been writing about things the last couple of days to help myself vent about how things that unnerve me. I want to make this into poetry. I've heard that poetry is all about how you break the lines, and if you feel enthusiastic enough, rhyme.
OP bilal ABUZENAH 15 / 81  
Nov 4, 2009   #3
THANKS GUYS. could you please check my other poems....please ...
vip747 4 / 18  
Nov 5, 2009   #4
This poem really is about nothing, which i doubt was the goal.
could you tell us what you were trying to write about?
OP bilal ABUZENAH 15 / 81  
Nov 5, 2009   #5
go over the first line. and think about it...thanks guys may please check my other poems.
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
Nov 6, 2009   #6
You can click on someone's username to see all their work!

I am trying to understand... is this about death? I hope not; that would be pretty grim!! I am glad that there is obviously something right now. Proof that something is possible. Maybe this body is nothing in particular, made up of the same stuff as everything else, but the fact of the matter is that consciousness rises up into the world of form. So... that is really something.
pheelyks - / 19  
Nov 20, 2009   #7
I've heard that poetry is all about how you break the lines, and if you feel enthusiastic enough, rhyme.

Not quite...not at all, actually.

No one can really define a poem. In a collection of poetry, for instance (or maybe it was a magazine, originally; I've only seen it in anthologies), Charles Bernstein once had a page that contained only a single line:

This poem intentionally left blank.

Now, I find this hysterically funny and incredibly intellectually stimulating, but I refuse to think of it as a poem. Here, I am at odds with many critics. A poem can be, then, whatever you want it to be. But that doesn't make it a good poem.

Line breaks are essential, but there are no rules for poetry anymore. Wherever you feel a line should stop, you can stop it; there should be an intended effect on the reader for each line break (it isn't arbitrary), but there's no formula for it.

The same is true of rhyme and meter (the pattern of stressed an unstressed syllables in a line). In modern poetry, rhyme and meter are generally thrown out the window. It's not about being "enthusiastic" or not, but rather about what kind of poem you want to write. I personally write poetry with strict rhyme and meter (Robert Frost said that writing a poem without rhyme and meter is like playing tennis without a net--it's a good analogy, I think), but you should let your intention with each poem help inform the style/structure.

The most essential thing to remember, in my opinion, is this: poetry is not just about letting your emotions out. If you want to write poems as a way of venting your anger/frustration/sadness, that's fine; write them in your journal, and maybe share them with a friend or loved one if you want. But do not expect them to be poems of real literary worth--they are of personal value, surely, but that doesn't make them of value to others. True poetry, to paraphrase Wordsworth (I'm full of quotes today), is the result of extreme emotion recalled in a period of tranquility. Poetry has an emotional source, certainly, but it is organized, edited, and shaped. There must be an intellect guiding the emotion, that is, not a simple outpouring of angst.
OP bilal ABUZENAH 15 / 81  
Nov 20, 2009   #8
Thanks pheelyks...

may you check those for me.
Jeannie 10 / 214  
Dec 18, 2009   #9
It's about the war in Iraq, yeah? That is what I got very plainly anyway...

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