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BARRON'S TOEFL IBT BOOK "advantages vs disadvantages of studying aboard"


Nohna 3 / 7  
Jun 5, 2010   #1
Studying aboard is a good chance for a person to discover himself deeply. In my view, I will challenge myself in different ways to adapt to circumences in this experience. For example, the first disadvantage I think about is the culture shock that I'll face. More over, I'll need time to understand and speak a language which is tottaly different from my mother tongue. Further more, the feeling of missing people and places backhome will adversly impact my grades in study and that will for sure frustrate me. In the other hand, I will get so much advantages from studuing aboard. For instance, I'll graduate from an international accreditated institution and that will expand my opportunity in finding a job. No doubt that living in an other country and meeting different people will make me open mind and will improve my dialog with members from other cultures. Further more, this experience will increase my knowledge and my life's experiences by being independent and take care of my self along with studying. Therefore, I'll be saticfied by daring myself to face what I am afraid of. In conclusion, studying aboard has so much more advantages comparing with disadvantages of such experience.
anubis 1 / 2  
Jun 5, 2010   #2
hello Nohna, I am sorry but i don't think it is a good paragraph. You made a lot of vocabulary mistakes such as "circumences", "tottaly", "accreditated",.. Your sentences are not complex enough and you use " will" too much . However you have a good structure and the idea is quite clear.

Have a good day :)
OP Nohna 3 / 7  
Jun 5, 2010   #3
Thanks a lot for your review I appretiate that.
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
Jun 6, 2010   #4
Studying aboard abroad is a good chance for a person to discover himself deeply. In my view,I will challenge myself in various ways to adapt to circumstances in this experience.

For example, the first disadvantage I think about is the culture shock that I'll face. ---- good sentence!

One word, not two: moreover and furthermore
Moreover , I'll need time to understand and speak a language which is totally different from my mother tongue. Furthermore, the feeling of missing people and places back home may adversely impact my grades in study and that will for sure
surely frustrate me. On the other hand, I will get so much many advantages from studying aboard. For instance, I'll graduate from an internationally accredited institution and ...

Use a spell checker! :-)

Therefore, I'll become satisfied by daring myself to face what I am afraid of. In conclusion, studying aboard abroad has many more advantages than disadvantages.

:-)
OP Nohna 3 / 7  
Jun 7, 2010   #5
Thank u Kevin. I benefited from your comments.


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