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Rough Draft on Climate Change - we have short time to react.


Keeg 1 / -  
Oct 3, 2020   #1
Keegan Schenk
Draft, Review, Reflect
Professor Korman

Draft, Review, Reflect

Effects of Climate Change



The worst impacts of climate change could be irreversible by the year 2030, making it so
imperative to act now and stop wasting time. Climate Change does not only affect the weather but this will affect much more like extinction of animals, corals, and so much more that whether you believe it or not are vital to human life. We are currently treating many other topics with more focus and without action now we won't have an Earth and all other problems become irrelevant. Climate change is starting to have effects on humans but not as harsh as it has been for many animal populations and our oceans. This will eventually end up messing with our entire ecosystem. To the people that love the ocean, the outdoors, the abundance of wildlife, and much more you need to stick up for a plan to combat climate change because if not those things go away sooner than you realize. Humans have caused 97 percent or more of climate change and it is also on humans to make up for their mistakes, take action, and save the Earth.

There needs to be action taken for not only ourselves but many populations of animals that we end up needing as well. Some of today's most beloved animals such as the cheetah, panda, sea turtle, tiger, elephants, and many many more are on the brink of extinction due to climate change. In some areas Cheetahs prey have declined and they have been forced to change their diets. Not only this but "A rise in temperatures has even affected this big cat's ability to reproduce. Male cheetahs have shown lowered testosterone levels, and a sperm count almost ten times lower than your house cat." Not only animals on land are being affected, oceans and forests as well. Changes deep and the oceans and high in the mountains are the hardest to recognize but that does not mean they are not happening. Many fish populations are migrating far away from their normal habitat to find cooler water. About 70-90 percent of all coral reefs have now died. Coral Reefs also support about 500 million people and are on the brink of extinction due to climate change. The beloved ocean will deem many problems over the next several years.

Climate Change is seriously affecting our environment but the effects on the environment has a huge affect on ourselves. Ice Sheets melting in Greenland will cause up to 20 extra feet in sea level by the time that they are all gone. To put this into perspective most of Florida and a third of New York City would be under water along with 145 million people that live at 3 feet above sea level or less, and 800 million that live 30 feet above. Fishing having to leave their habitats for cooler waters is directly affecting fishermans ability to catch fish as their job. This becomes a problem when 17% of the protein consumed in the world comes from the ocean. Looking at climate change now there is no other option than taking action because you realize how much of a threat the human population is in whether it is due to the fall of ecosystem with the loss of different animal species, the rise of the seas, the death of the oceans, or our last topic the severity of weather.

Just over the past couple of months we have seen the effects of climate change right in front of our eyes, when it started with tons of wildfires in Australia and a lot along the West Coast of The United States. The wildfires in California are a direct result of 5 plus years of a new level of heat, rainfall at 20 percent the normal amount, and the worst drought in many years. As the fires started to calm down and improve I think people often forget that fires like that and more that start to occur will have a huge impact on the air quality. At some point there will be a version of today's snow days but for days when people can not go outside due to the horrible air quality. Temperatures have been slowly increasing for years and we have started to and will see more of the effects soon, but some of them have been increasing in the number of people who die from things like exhaustion, dehydration, and heat strokes. There will be an increase in deaths like this and similar by 2,000-10,000 per year in each US city. Climate Change is not something to take lightly.

There has to be drastic action taken right away for us to get anywhere on combating climate change. The sooner our animals and our environments start to diminish the sooner the human population starts to diminish and that is a lot closer than most people think. We can easily make a change because we are the ones who have contributed to at least 97 percent of climate change. The point of no return is just 10 years away from us so we need to take action immediately.

Cline, William R. The Economics of Global Warming. Inst. for Internat. Economics, 1996.

Root, Terry L., et al. "Fingerprints of Global Warming on Wild Animals and Plants." Nature News, Nature Publishing Group

Vitousek, Peter M. "Beyond Global Warming: Ecology and Global Change." The Ecological Society of America, John Wiley & Sons, Ltd

Körner, Christian, and David Basler. "Phenology Under Global Warming." Science, American Association for the Advancement of Science

Wentz, Frank J., et al. "How Much More Rain Will Global Warming Bring?" Science, American Association for the Advancement of Science
Zainab Eid 2 / 2 1  
Oct 3, 2020   #2
Good scientific essay Keeg, and it could be improved with these tips.

you started with a good introductory paragraph.
Although I have some suggestions:
* instead of saying ( a plan to combat climate change because if not those things go away sooner than you realize), you can say( before those things disappear..)

*There needs to be action taken..., you may say (there is an urgent need to take actions for ....)

* write( pet cat) instead of (house cat)
* Climate Change is seriously affecting our environment but, (using (which in turn) here makes more sense then using but) the effects on ...

You may also benefit from changing the word (but) in some sentences, in order to avoid repeating it many time.
I recommend to use some synonyms for it like:
However / Nevertheless / Still / Yet / Even so / On the contrary / In contrast/Although / (Even) though.

Good Luck
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,801 4780  
Oct 4, 2020   #3
You are making a hyperbolic claim in the first paragraph without first establishing the foundation for the claim. Where is the build up for reasons, explanations, facts and figures that will give credence to your claim that; "The worst impacts of climate change could be irreversible by the year 2030". As a scientific paper, you should be able to create a logical explanation prior to presenting your claim.

Your paper is actually more sensationalist in presentation rather than academic. It is all about making claims that are not properly supported by scientific, popular, or personal research information for the most part. There are no properly in-text citations in the essay that will help to establish the validity of your "quoted" information. That means you are opening your paper up to plagiarism claims. Always remember, if you have a citation page, you need to cite the same references in relation to the information that you used in the presentation.


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