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Academic Reference Letter for Scholarships and To Get a University

izecsony5 4 / 9 2  
Dec 3, 2019   #1
Please help me to review my reference letter.
This reference letter originally written by my supervisor in February 2019.
That time, I used this letter for Australia Awards Scholarship (AAS). But, if it is possible, I wanted to use this letter for other scholarship and to apply to the universities.

I supervised his works for final thesis in order to got a bachelor degree with the title is,"Efficiency of Promotional Fees And Services In Raising Third Party Funds In Sharia Bank". Mr HMW came up with this title as a result from his research, both in the library and on the field. As a methodology to measure efficiency, I was surprised that he used the Data Envelopment Analysis (DEA) approach with DEAWIN as main tool (software). Because at that time, this method was rarely used by student as most of them are more familiar with BOPO (Operational Cost-Operational Income) approach. Thus, in order to be familiar with DEAWIN he tirelessly learned from his senior in faculty about how to operate DEAWIN, how DEAWIN do a calculation, and analyze DEAWIN's output.

During my time guided Mr. HMW, I know him as a person who has a good motivation and hard work in order to achieve goals. In my case, it could be seen when he collected the data and earlier studies that related to his methodologies. He tried to collect the data from one bank to another, until he got them from "X Bank". Beside that, he was also did a research from previous studies eagerly, even though the previous study that used DEA were rare.

The scope of his thesis was 10 branches of X Bank with 7 variables as a benchmark of efficiency such as advertising, promotion, publicity, personal selling, automated teller machine (ATM), frontliner, and space convenience. As there were many variables that Mr. HMW used it, it was necessary to collect the data carefully and they have to meet with the criteria based on the theory. The purpose of his works to identified operational cost which branches were efficient according these 7 factors and which variable were efficient between those 7 variables in order to collect a third party funds. Variables or branches are called efficient if the output of DEAWIN shown 100%, other than that they called inefficient. The result from his works showed that operational cost for ATM, frontliner, and space convenience were efficient. On the other hand, only 2 branches out of 10 that identified were efficient.

He finished his thesis about 6 months, fast enough regarding the number of variables and objects that he involve in his works. It proved that he could works under pressure without wasted more times. Thus, I believe that Mr. HMW is ready enough to continue his study since he has an ability to understand in a short time and able to do an individual or teamwork commitment in order to fulfill his tasks.

XPROFF 3 / 15 13  
Dec 5, 2019   #2

I would like to give my feedback your reference letter.

Firstly, the reference given good details of the work you have done.
However, I do not feel that it shows the type of student you are academically, proffessionally and your experiences that has shaped you to become an great scholar.

I think to improve, it should include your academic capabilities, preseverance, personal characters , professionalism and ability to impact community post graduat.

Secondly, you should give reasons why that particular university you prefer with relation to academic qualities, personal interests and career development.

I hope these comments helps you on deciding your reference.

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