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Here is my essay`s answer for the leadership and influence for applying to a Chevening scholarship.

Nicola Ojena 1 / 1  
Sep 24, 2017   #1


The most motivating thing in life is education as is stated by late Nelson Mandela "Education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world". I always asks myself about what I can do to bring positive changes to myself as well as community, then what comes to my mind is education. I have placed education and religion as a core of life guidance, which can allow me to offers good services in the world. Since I grew, I learned these features during the high school at Saint lowanga Catholic School. Such principles are led me to make the most sensitive decisions in my life.

After the high school I joined Sudan University of Science and Technology in the faculty of Radiology and Medical Instrumentation Engineering. I got appointed as biomedical engineer in the Ministry of Health in Juba Teaching Hospital. During my working period I was loyal to hospital administration and supervisors. I acquired several skills that helped me in develop of works ethic and taking of responsibilities.

Studying abroad or being away from home to me is not new thing, because I been I China for duration of two years for post graduate studies. In fact China is known by its life regulations and cultural differences even the language. But when I went there, I found it not like what I heard before, it`s only the matter of adaptation with environment and people. This experiment has made me much stronger and much self-confidence.

What encouraged me to applying to this program is because studying in United Kingdom, I am always wishes to study in UK. As I heard from people who did their studies in UK, about how is grateful to study in UK Universities. And the highest ranking colleges of life science can be found in UK. Addition to that there is multicultural environment and historical places that I would like to visit it.

Another reason because South Sudan is a new nation among developing Countries and educational system is the worst, also there is few intellectual people and deficit in health system. South Sudan is in needs of Medical cadres that can fill the gaps and improvement of health system services through implementation of modern methods of diseases prevention and controlling of outbreak of communicable diseases. Health system in country were decline due to current conflict, which consume the green and dry resources. I certainly would like to take my full responsibilities and I will walk forward to be leader and work by all abilities for the prosperity of people.

Holt [Contributor] - / 7,839 2130  
Sep 24, 2017   #2
Nicola, this is nothing like the required leadership and influencing essay response that should have been created in response to the Chevening prompt. What you wrote is something similar to a personal statement, which is more geared towards a college admission essay than a scholarship grant. It will be in your best interests to review the already completed essays for this Chevening prompt that are posted at this forum. Read the comments that were made for the improvement of those papers. Try to learn what mistakes they made and how it was corrected. Then do some personal review of your leadership and influencing skills based upon your profession. Make sure to address the required elements in your new essay and then post it as a new thread here for proper review. You should find that there will be a significant number of changes to your essay based upon the provided examples. For one, you need to show leadership instead of subordinate skills as you do in this essay. It is one thing to be loyal to your employer, it is another thing to be a leader in the function of your duties for your employer. That is one clue that I can give you for the revision of your essay. What your actual new draft should contain, will be based upon the leadership skills and influencing nature that you have exercised over your team mates or co-employees. Another suggestion is that you use actual work related leadership and influencing examples in your essay in order to better illustrate your role as a leader and influential figure in your place of work. These suggested presentations should help you better align your response towards the required prompt elements.
makarios 1 / 6 3  
Sep 24, 2017   #3
@Nicola Ojena
i think you started very well in your first paragraph, however i think you sorta derailed from your second paragraph. the idea of the essay is to demonstrate your leadership abilities and how you have been able to influence your community positively.

OP Nicola Ojena 1 / 1  
Sep 24, 2017   #4
Thanks a lot for your help and support. actually this my first essay to a Chevening scholarship, certainly I missed preciously aspects answer. I will write this essay according to you corrections and suggestions, then I will post the new one.

Thanks you so much, I went through your essay and its made me to think twice. I will try to include valuable information in the next essay.

Best regards.

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