Aviation Scholarship Essay For Female Pilots: What's the best way to stand out?

Instructions:
an essay (500 words) describing career aspirations and goals, achievements/honors, aviation development to date, involvement with WAI, volunteerism, leadership, and planned use of scholarship funds.

the United Airlines Flight Operation Scholarship

I began my quest to achieve my dream of becoming an airline pilot by attending Minnesota State University. As an undergraduate, I study Aviation (Pro-Flight) and Spanish. At MSU, I am a part of the Honors Program, Dean's List, Women in Aviation, Flight Team, Club Volleyball, Children's Ministry Volunteer, Cru, Spanish Club, and Study Abroad Program. I enjoy being a part of these wonderful organizations because of the opportunities I've received to learn and grow as a person, leader, student, global citizen, and pilot.

For the past two years, I have been the Social Media Chair of the WIA Northern Lights Chapter. Because of WIA I have met and made many connections with people in the Airline Industry, which may help me receive job interviews in the future. With connections created by WIA, our chapter creates great opportunities. Some I have had opportunities of touring weather and dispatch offices, Delta's operations, and more at MSP. WIA events have given me the opportunity to experience and learn more about the daily routines at an airport. This has given me a better understanding of how an airline functions and the importance of work relationships between the different occupations at an airport. It is important to understand the full process to make better decisions as a pilot. Additionally, I have been able to give back to the aviation community by volunteering at the Girls in Aviation Day in St. Paul every year and many other small events that are held on campus to help aid aviation students and to promote aviation to younger students.

The growth I have made comes from unforeseen challenges I have faced. These challenges have taught me to view everything through a 'mindset of growth.' Carol S. Dweck, a professor at Standford wrote one of my favorite quotes stating that "In a mindset of growth, challenges are exciting rather than threatening." I came across this quote during my instrument training and it has contributed to all my achievements since.

My instrument flight instructor had the biggest heart and wanted nothing more than to see me succeed. However, his style of instruction didn't function well with my learning style. I became very frustrated, upset, and I thought about quitting. I kept thinking to myself 'why can't I just do it? What am I doing wrong?' Thanks to the help of some of my peers, flight instructors, and a mindset of growth, the light bulb in my head switched on. After reaching the summit of that mountain, I've been making large leaps forwards on my journey to accomplishing my dream of being an airline pilot. In the past year, I have earned my Instrument Rating, Commercial SEL and MEL License.

If I am chosen as a recipient of the United Airlines Flight Operation Scholarship, I will put the money towards my goal of becoming an MEI, CFI, and CFII. I want to become a flight instructor to enhance and expand my knowledge as a pilot. Additionally, flight instructing will allow me to educate others safe and proper technique, which one day may prevent and save them and their passengers in an emergency.

Madison, I feel like I am starting to read your essay from the middle instead of the beginning. I think that this sense of incompleteness will dissipate if you first, establish the foundation of your dream to become an airline pilot. Where does that come from? Why do you think becoming an airline pilot will make you a positive member of the community. Try to tie in your aspirations and goals to an individual and community setting in order to impress upon the reviewer that you are not just after self aggrandizement in your quest to become an airline pilot.

There is no need to enumerate all of the clubs and associations that you belong to. You must only indicate the clubs and associations that you are a member of where you made a significant contribution either through participation or leadership. Otherwise, the reviewer will not be impressed by you simply being a member of these clubs. Scholarship foundations are normally more receptive to applicants who have shown that they can be upstanding citizens and members of their immediate and academic community. I believe an adjustment in content for that paragraph is in order.

The quotation that you suddenly introduced in the middle of the essay doesn't work with any of the prompt requirements. In my opinion, your essay will do better without it. You can safely remove that without affecting the overall essay because you will be removing the reference to how you were inspired or rattled by your flight instructors anyway.

Your essay does not have any academic achievement or honors indicate. Why is that? If you are only an average student, then you will need to justify your gpa in your application and explain why that is not an accurate reflection of your abilities as a future pilot. Explaining how you were taught and inspired or not inspired by you instructors do not take the place of an explanation regarding your academic achievements or lack thereof. You must specifically discuss that in an appropriate manner in a stand alone paragraph.