BANNING OR NOT WITH THE PERPETRATION OF PEOPLES' PRIVATE INFORMATION BY PUBLISHING THEIR STORIES

Hoping of receiving some devoted comments to make my essay become convinced. Thank you for concerning.
Nowadays, a lot of media, including newspapers, magazines, televisions, radio, and even the Internet, are publishing stories of people private lives. Should this practice be banned?

people's private rights and media

The infringement of human rights has raised controversial disputes in the world, and one of them is the actuality of people's private rights. The media's tendency to reveal an individual's life in newspapers, magazines, televisions, radio and the Internet have kindled people's objections to being badly influenced. In my opinion, this trend needs banning by both personal and legal reasons.

Firstly, if the private lives or even sensitive facts of journalists, celebrities or speakers who rashly proclaim others' secret be peered into, what will they feel? Evidently, everyone has their own private stories which are forbidden to others' intervention. These affect their emotions, psychologies, failure, weakness and even life orientations. As a result, they can easily lose their temper and act uncontrollably, even suddenly destroy themselves because of fear and outside preconceptions. In perpetrators' view, it can not be speculative that these unlegalized behaviors help people gain popularity in public because their impulses are not rooted from positive intention but satisfy themselves upon others' important issues. Moreover, they concern much about view ration instead of the accuracy of information transmitted and victims' acquiescence. In any interactive relationship, if the consensus is ignored and the inevitable consequences are not directly pointed out, it is immoral for people's private information to be exposed.

Secondly, in the legal view, it is completely undue to publicize people's information of their own lives regardless of any warrant. Everyone merit private rights in whatever form like letters, personal information, the current state of relationships and political concepts or views,... which are ruled in any constitution. "Private lives" is a phrase manifesting about sensitive stories of people, which shouldn't be approached without their permission, so the revealed posts in the media justify the violation of the law. Based on this, the executive bodies must be compelled to control severely this tumultuous state and secure their citizens' security as well as quell the blackmail and other unwished circumstances.

In conclusion, any practice consistently linking with peoples' private rights need being legally bound and compactly consult with people of that information. If the rules cannot be complied, a stern ban must be put.

In my opinion, paragraph 2 will not convince the reader. I think you should use different style of explanation. for example, this will effect negatively to the victim psychologically instead of losing their temper and act controllably.

Linh, first up, you should know by now that there is a 5 sentence limit for the Task 2 essays. This being a direct question essay falls under the same ruling. Please make sure to count your sentences again. When you write too much, you tend to change the discussion angle. Which is what almost happened to this essay because you presented a question in the second paragraph. Stick to the actual question provided. This is not the essay where you should be analytical about the feelings of the celebrities. You should have just referred to that directly, without the question because the question could have changed the total discussion topic for the essay.

No special punctuation marks in this discussion. No ellipses, most specially, no ellipses after a comma. That is never done. It is either you use an ellipse or you use a comma, you can never use both in combination.

Don't get me wrong, your discussion is on topic for most of the essay, which is good. There are just times when you forget what type of essay you are writing, which results in certain rule deviations on your part. Just be conscious of the type of essay that you are writing, which is academic, and follow the writing rules for academic papers. You can't go wrong when you follow those rules when writing these essays.