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To be a business woman who is able to help the world. Self introduction for KGSP 2017

ylin0233 3 / 10  
Mar 7, 2017   #1
Hello to all,
I've finished writing this long time ago. Now working on my study plan and future plan. I just wanna post this up and to make sure it's a good induction for my application. Please let me know if there is any improvement should be done. this scholarship really means a lot to me. I appreciate your help.

I am a leader among my peers

My name is (Name), major in international business in xxx University in xxx. I will receive my bachelor's degree in May 2017 and I hope to continue on the path of academic improvement to help me achieve my goal in life. My dream is to be a successful international business woman who is able to help the world reach harmony and improve human welfare. I was born in a small town in southern Taiwan. Although my parents did not pursue a higher education, they are self-made adults. My parents built a thriving business from scratch and through that example I learned that as long as you work hard you can do anything. Growing up under my parent's liberal education style has made me independent, accountable and helped me to become an opinionated, discerning and a more open-minded person to myself and others.

My friends describe me as a persuasive, passionate and confident person. With my strong personality, I am a leader among my peers. I was voted as a class representative in middle school and in high school. As a leader, I believe in teamwork. My leadership not only allows my voice to be heard but also allows me to build strong relationships with others. I continue to practice this until this day. I was a leader of the public relations section in xxx school club and a member in students' association. While being active in school clubs, I learned not only how to make friends and interact with a diverse array of people but also learned how to host activities, lead others and the ways to organize. Newton once said "If I have seen further, it is by standing on the shoulders of giants." I believe in contribution to the community. Thus I became part of the social welfare club at school. I had the chance to volunteer to teach children English in the mountainside of xxxx. Although I was the one teaching them, I felt like I was the one who actually learned more. I was touched by the children's pure hearts and how they longed for learning despite their lack of resources. With this experience, I value what I have more and I am willing to give and help out others in need in any way I am able.

Traveling is one of my strongest interests. I was always amazed at seeing all the cultural differences and different life styles when I traveled abroad. In order to step out of my comfort zone and to experience the foreign life, I went to U.S.A. after my freshman year in high school for a year. Being the most energetic international student in the school, I was awarded the International Student of 2012 in xxx High school. In the states, English is no longer a subject, but a means of communication. At that point a tight bond between foreign languages and me formed. With my affection for foreign cultures and business growing everyday, I decided to major in international business in university. With my zealous passion for the subject and confidence in my academic performance, I received a xxx GPA during four years in university. I was also selected to be the exchange student representative to study in xxx University, U.S.A during my junior year. The world is a book, you have to read it yourself to know what is in there, and you have to see it with your own eyes to know the truth.

In the recent years, Korea has become a strong presence in the world's economic forefront. In soft power, K-pop has grown huge and fast all over the world. In hard power, Korea's business strength is famous worldwide. Top universities in Korea receive some of the highest rankings in the world. Being able to study business in Korea will solidify my path to reaching my goal. In the process of being an international business woman, being able to speak more than one foreign language is essential. Having unbreakable bonds with Korean friends enhanced my interest in learning Korean. In order to improve my Korean ability, I attended xxx University Korean Language Institution last summer and received a TOPIK 2 certificate. While in Korea, I was much impressed and appreciated my time in Korea. I fell in love with the country. I made a promise to myself to go back to Korea someday and KGSP is my shot.

It's amazing how KGSP provides many financial supports and academic benefits. What's more important is that being in this program, students are able to get to know people from all over the world and exchange different cultures while attending graduate school. Being able to be a part of the program will be an amazing opportunity for me in being able to receive the advanced education without worrying about the financial difficulty, and it will bring me that much closer toward my goal. If chosen, I will not only do my best to complete the program with excellent academic performance, but also help to bridge the gap between xxxx and Korea to increase the interaction between the people, cultures, and businesses.
azaa1428 2 / 8 1  
Mar 7, 2017   #2

Is there more achievements during your undergraduate years?
Many people advised me that not write much about high school, it's better to write about academic study.
So in my opinion, you should add more achievements during in your University.

Hope my advise help you.
OP ylin0233 3 / 10  
Mar 7, 2017   #3
Sorry for the confusion. I deleted the name of the school clubs because it has my uni's name on it. The only things I mentioned about high school are actually only me as class representative and study abroad in USA.

Thank you so for ur reply!
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 13,591 4458  
Mar 7, 2017   #4
Lin, the focus of your academic background should not include high school information anymore. Those are considered irrelevant in terms of your education because you are now applying for a masters degree course. Therefore, the concentration of your self introduction should only be on your college studies, your accomplishments during that time, any internships you may have had, along with awards from your school. After presenting those information, you should present a professional background for yourself. However, since you are graduating in May of this year, it will be best if you focus on your training and internship programs that are relevant to your course of study under the masters course.

By the way, what is the masters course you are planning to study? Be specific about the masters course and explain why you are going to study the masters degree immediately after graduation instead of working for a few years first. Why is it important that you earn the masters degree this early in your life? Why earn it before you even start your career?

This essay doesn't follow the normal path of a introduction due to your admission that you are just about to graduate. So you have to make sure that your college background is as impressive as it can be in order to make the reviewer consider your application more important than that of a more experienced and professional applicant.

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